Help Me
by writingmonkey10
Summary: Different take on IM2, Tony is dying of palladium poisoning but he has found a "temporary" cure with a twist. How he and Pepper get through it, Pepperony, hurt/comfort, movieverse, first Iron Man Fic guys!, spoilers, read AFTER watching IM2
1. Chapter 1

**Hmm…so…I've never written Iron Man FF. I'm definitely a House, M.D girl, so this is going to be an interesting first. Oh, and all I know about Iron Man is what's in the movies – never read the comics (sadly) so if I hopelessly screw something over or I openly show my naiveté concerning any particular subject, forgive me please! **

**Also, the basis of this idea is probably already being explored, has been explored or will be explore. Still, I'll do my best to make it unique. I had this idea hours after watching IM2 and I HAVE to do this. Enjoy! **

**Chapter 1**

Approximately twenty four hours after his failed birthday party (well, it wouldn't have failed if Rhodey hadn't come along), Tony was back in his shop, half a donut in his mouth, doing what he did best. Tinkering, messing with things, ordering Dummy around, insulting Butterfingers…or creating an invention that was bound to blow away your mind, whichever you preferred. The only difference, was that this time, his invention was more biological than it was mechanical. And his new creation wouldn't wasn't designed to "help" him in the ordinary sense of the word.

He was dying, and he wasn't one to loathe in self pity, but there was nothing he could do about it. He was going through palladium for his arc reactor like candy – multiple batteries a day. He had already designed and tested probably over a hundred different elements and combinations of elements to replace the palladium – nothing had worked and as his blood toxicity increased at an almost exponential rate, he had realized that he couldn't just leave without finishing up a few things first.

It was a race against the clock now, and one of the things on his list had been crossed off just twenty four hours ago thanks to Rhodey. The military finally had his suit. The only consolation Tony had was that it was the Mark II. At least when he died, he'd take the secrets of the more advanced suits with him. He couldn't make the military's job that easy. So they had their suit. Now they had to work for the rest.

And his lawyer…had been an ass. Yes, his lawyer.

He was re-drafting his will.

He was too young to _re_-draft a will.

_Shut up_, he told himself as he worked.

Of course, his lawyer had not only been suspicious but had repeatedly tried to pry into his personal life. It was bad enough the lawyer had to know he was working through his will (besides, Tony wasn't sure how to legally draft a will without a lawyer) and though the lawyer had confidentiality protocol to follow, Tony knew those would go out the window if it was revealed _why_ he had to suddenly draft a will. His lawyer still thought Tony was doing this because he wanted to make sure all of his things ended up in the right hands if anything happened to him, being Iron Man and all when, in reality, that was the least of Tony's problems. And what was worse, his lawyer thought he had time. Well, maybe _he_ did but Tony sure as hell didn't. He might be self destructive but he wasn't an idiot – time was time.

_Sir,_ JARVIS started, almost hesitantly. _It appears Ms. Potts is making her way down to the shop. If you still insist on keeping your condition from her you should probably stop—_

"Mute," Tony commanded before JARVIS could continue, already certain of what he would say. Better hide the stuff he was working on before Pepper put her inquisitive nose into his business. Not that he hated her inquisitiveness. Actually he liked that and it was part of the reason why he had hired her to begin with. But for once, he really hoped she'd let her guard down. And by the looks of the expression on her face, she wasn't going to pay much attention to what he was working on. She was livid.

"Pepper, are you busy?" he asked, hoping his relatively nonchalant demeanor would get him off easy. No such luck. "Because that Natalie chick we hired isn't ever around to--"

In almost a single breath, Pepper interrupted. "This is a document that says you were one hundred percent sane when you handed over the job of CEO to me; this says any damage done to any person or equipment other than yours last night shall be paid in full by you; this says you will meet your lawyer in a week to discuss any of the damages that occurred--" For each statement, Pepper handed Tony a sheet of paper, with X's marked where he should sign. She had on the straightest but obviously most pissed off expressions he had ever seen.

"Well, that's not too bad," Tony said as he started signing. Wait a minute… "Wait, what was the last one?"

"That you finally agree that _all_ information regarding the suit should be handed over to the military. _Permanently_."

Tony threw the pen on the counter in reluctance. "I'm not signing _that_. You were going to make me sign that? Whose side are you on?"

"I'm not sure which side I _should_ be on, Tony. And considering your…_party_ last night, I think they just might have a point. In that circumstance, the suit was a dangerous weapon that could have done considerable damage."

"Yeah, _in that circumstance_," Tony pointed quickly. "And it's not a weapon, I thought this has already been established."

"It blows things up," Pepper said pointedly. "It's a weapon."

"It's a suit."

"It's a weapon!"

"Since when did you ever agree with them, especially regarding this?"

"Since your inventions started harming innocent people because you were being careless."

"No one got hurt," Tony argued, thinking back. In fact, if he recalled correctly, _he_ had been the one who got hurt thanks to Rhodes.

"Someone could have, Tony. Because you were drunk, in a suit you had designed and created, that had the potential to blow up the entire building."

Tony still wasn't entirely convinced. "Okay…so it _looks_ bad."

Pepper said nothing. Instead, she took all the paper she had given him – the signed and the unsigned. "You know I'm always behind you with anything you want to do, despite how crazy or…or out there it might be. But yesterday?" She gathered the last of the papers and took her pen. "Yesterday was just ridiculous." And she turned on her heels and walked out of the room without a second look back.

She was disappointed more than she was angry, Tony could tell. _If she knew what I was going through…if she knew why I did it_. It was his last birthday party. Couldn't he be reckless…or perhaps more appropriately, destructive? Actually, that just made it sound worse.

It definitely wasn't the brightest idea he'd ever come up with, but he had fun and more importantly, he had _forgotten_. He had forgotten about his impending death and that was the point, wasn't it? Still, excuses couldn't be made, and he knew it. It was stupid, and the mature thing to do was apologize, or better yet, fess up and tell her the truth.

But that wasn't fair either, to throw the burden on her. Telling her wasn't going to help him and it would only make her worry about something no one could change.

"JARVIS, how's the specimen?"

_It's ready for activation._

"Great. Get the basin ready for the heat-shock."

_Sir, you do realize that the heat-shock method is an established means of transformation for bacterial plasmids and not for—_

"Yes, I am aware but the concept is still the same."

_Actually, sir—_

"I don't recall programming you to argue, JARVIS," Tony said, amused. "Prepare the sample and make sure the basin's at optimum temperature."

_Yes, sir_, JARVIS replied, sounding almost exasperated.

"And put my lawyer on the line. I need to yell at him again."

_Yes, sir._

_

* * *

_

_**6 hours later**_

_Sir, the diagnostics have been completed. The solution is completely viable_.

Success! Tony thought to himself as he lifted up the syringe and observed the green solution he had created. This was…different; no nuts and bolts involved. Still, this 10 mL solution would be a temporary _and_ permanent solution. Temporary in the sense that all of his symptoms, all the problems the palladium was causing would disappear instantly. It was permanent because in exactly one week, the very solution he was holding in his hand would kill him.

It was a last resort. If his math was right, which it always was, the time between his blood toxicity reaching a fatal amount and his death would be six hours. Six hours of pain that was supposed to feel like he was detoxing off an opiate. This solution that he had just created was going to take care of not only that pain, but it would take care of all his symptoms as well. But in one week, the same temporary cure that he had just created would kill him anyway. The only upside was that he'd die without the pain and probably just in his sleep. But the one week would give him time, a deadline, to set things right. This syringe was Tony Stark beating death for a week.

He stood up and took the syringe with him, placing it on his desk. In a swift motion he checked his blood toxicity and while the machine was running, used the time to change the palladium in his arc reactor. Again.

_84% BLOOD TOXICITY_

Damn.

* * *

For the last two hours, Tony had been debating calling Pepper to _at least_ apologize. It was bad enough he was dying and she still had no idea so the least he could do was apologize. Right? But he was worried that if he started apologizing, he might not stop, and he'd end up telling her the truth. Or maybe he'd start to tell her the truth but chicken out of it anyway. Either way, it didn't make him feel any better about himself.

As he made his way down the stairs to his shop, he commanded, "JARVIS, I need you to--"

An indescribable pain shot through his leg and into his chest and seemed to grab and squeeze his heart. Tony collapsed immediately, tumbling down the rest of the stairs and landing hard on his side on the floor below. He gasped for air and moments later, the same pain shot through his entire body again, causing his heart to spasm and Tony cried out as his brain took in an overload of pain he hadn't known he could endure.

_Oh, shit_…he thought as he crawled into his workshop using his arms alone. Every foot or so, his entire body would spasm and he'd stop, screaming or trying to hold in a scream. By the time he reached his desk, he was sweating and shivering at the same time and barely able to drag himself any further. He reached up towards his desk, tugging at the drawer, trying to get it open. His muscles kept clenching, making the task next to impossible but after over a minute of tugging, the entire drawer came crashing onto the floor beside him. The palladium batteries scattered around him.

Another spasm. It felt like a giant shock of electricity coursing through his being. He screamed, banging his head against the edge of the table accidentally. In the back of his mind, he knew the palladium wasn't going to do anything. It was too late for that. But he wasn't ready to take the solution. He wasn't ready to draw that definitive line. He wasn't ready, he wasn't ready, he wasn't ready…

The pain charged through him again but this time he held in the outburst, clenching his fist and curling up into fetal position, remembering where he had left the syringe. It was feet away from him in a cabinet – the top drawer. And there was no way in hell he'd make it there. Slowly but with determination, he managed to half kick, half crawl to the cabinet. His hand tried to reach up though the feat was impossible if he couldn't stand up. He needed help.

Pepper.

No, not Pepper. She didn't need to see this and she sure as hell didn't need to be the one to give it to him. The plan was never to tell Pepper to do this. She wasn't supposed to be involved but now…now he was going to stay here, writhing in agony for the next six hours if he didn't call her. Besides, what should he say? "Pepper, it's me. I'm dying. Come kill me." No, he couldn't do this to her.

The strength and power at which the next wave of pain hit him was almost a rebuttal to his statement. Tony screamed, holding on to anything that was around him and closing his eyes shut as if to shield out the pain. It felt like someone was trying to rip out his heart from the inside and his entire body felt sore, as if he had run around the world a dozen times. In the aftermath of the wave of pain, he breathed quickly through his teeth, about to mutter the words he knew he'd end up regretting for the rest of his life…which was for about a week.

"JARVIS….call…Pepper…."

* * *

Pepper was getting ready for a meeting with the board. Yet, the one person on her mind was Tony. She felt terrible for what she had said to him even though he very well deserved it. Still, it was hardly fair since she hadn't even heard him out. Well, what was there to hear out? It was his fault, doing something stupid like that…

In the middle of her thought process, her phone started ringing and she quickly took it out. If it was another member of the board or another reporter that had managed to get her number…She frowned a little when she looked at the number. It was Tony.

Angrily, she tossed her phone back into her purse. If it was that important, he'd leave a message. She left to take a shower.

* * *

_Sir, it appears Pepper didn't pick up. Would you rather leave a message or redial?_

Tony could hardly believe his ears. She always answered her phone. Why wouldn't she…was she still angry at him? Of course she was angry. Maybe he should leave her. But what was he supposed to do, go through this for another six hours? How could he even _live_ through the next six hours?

_Sir?_

"Call again," Tony instructed as he clenched his jaw in preparation for another shock wave.

* * *

Almost forty five minutes later, Pepper was in the back of the car with Happy on their way to the meeting. Her phone started ringing and immediately, Pepper whipped it out to check who was calling. Tony. She rolled her eyes and was about to hang up when she realized she had thirteen missed calls – all for him. Her eyes widened, realizing that it was probably important and she had been too busy in the bathroom getting ready she hadn't even realized her phone had rung so many times. Immediately, she picked up.

"Tony?"

"Pepper…"

She could immediately tell something was wrong. He sounded like he was being strangled.

"Tony, what's going on, where are you?"

"Shop…I need you…" She heard him make some sort of moaning guttural sound that sounded like he was choking on his own breath.

"Tony, what's going on; are you okay?"

"I can't reach it…I need…"

"Tony, just…hold on, I'm coming over right now, okay? Okay, Tony? Tony!" She stared at her phone for a split second, realizing the call had ended. "Happy, take me to Tony's place, please."

"Ms. Potts, what about the meeting?"

"Forget the meeting."

**Ummm…so that's the first chapter. I'll try and update soon. Please review and tell me how I did! :) kthxbai**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews guys! And I have GOT to say this: I had more reviews for the first chapter than I usually get per chapter for my House FF. And I have WAY more readers for House – I guess more people just write/read House FF. Dang, guys. So…you guys made me so happy! :) Believe me, reviews are always a constant motivator. It's nice to get the feedback. Anyway…**

**Chapter 2**

"Tony?" Pepper called out as soon as she had entered the house. Her own voice echoed, bouncing on the walls and finally coming back to her in an endless stream. "Tony!" she yelled out again as she rushed down the stairs towards his workshop, despite her heels. The fact that he wasn't answering was scaring her. Once downstairs, she keyed in the password and let herself in but still, she did not find him. Where was he? He had said he would be in the shop. She called out his name again, growing increasingly frustrated and worried, checking the floors to see if he was underneath some latest contraption trying to fix something. What she found was much worse.

"Tony!"

He was curled up in fetal position, shaking, his back facing her. She rushed over and gently rolled him over onto his back. His shirt was drenched with sweat and was sticking to his body, his hair was plastered around his face and his breathing was labored. Tony's eyes were closed tightly as he twitched and shook, obviously in extreme pain.

"Oh, God…Tony, what happened?" She couldn't have felt guiltier and more terrible in her entire life. Had he been like this for the last hour? She hadn't picked up the first time because she was angry and had missed all his other calls because she had been in the bathroom. If she had just picked up the first time, she would have reached him. This was her fault.

He opened his bloodshot eyes and swallowed hard, trying to contain the pain he was feeling. When he opened his mouth, a low, unintelligible, guttural sound escaped instead of the words in his head. He jerkily motioned towards his chest and immediately, Pepper suspected the arc reactor. Was it broken? Did he need a new one? She immediately lifted up his shirt to see what the problem was and was again faced with another shock. Spider like, silver veins had spare from his arc reactor and all over his entire chest, forming almost an intricate road map. She gingerly placed her finger on one of the veins protruding from his chest and followed it, speechless. What was this? "Tony…what's…"

Tony swallowed again and managed to mutter, "Palladium…" he motioned towards the floor beside her where all the palladium batteries had been scattered. Pepper grabbed one of them not sure what to do with it but Tony only shook his head.

"Tony, I don't understand…what do you want me to do, what's going on? I don't know what to do…"

God, where should he start? How was he supposed to explain what was happening to him? For an hour, he had been on the floor, dealing with the pain, sweating, dry heaving, and he hadn't figured out what to say to Pepper when she actually showed up. He clenched his jaw as another wave of pain rushed through him, causing his eyes to roll towards the back of his head.

"Tony, please…" Pepper begged, trying not to break down. She wanted to help but she didn't know what to do.

Tony grabbed her arm with all he had him and Pepper gasped at his strength despite his situation. "Pepper, I…it's not working…" he said, trying to reach his chest with his other hand feebly.

"What's not…" Pepper started, trying to understand this game of charades. "You're…you're arc reactor? It's not working? Do you need this?" she raised up the palladium battery.

"No…it doesn't work anymore," he tried to explain without going into any detail. Not that he could even if he wanted to. "It…it's not working. It's…doing this…" he touched his chest and the spider veins all over it.

"It's…it's hurting you? So you need a new one of these?" she lifted up the palladium. "A different one? One that works better? Do you have one, where do I get it?"

_There is no other one_, Tony wanted to tell her. Instead he shook his head. "No…no new ones…I tried--" He stopped talking and immediately let out a muffled scream, quickly letting go of Pepper's arm, scared he'd hurt her. Instead, his hand shook, frozen in position as he tried to blur out the pain.

"Tony," Pepper tried to reassure him, though she knew it wouldn't do much. "Tony, where do I get a new one?"

He shook his head. "No new ones…I tried and I couldn't…find it…"

Pepper didn't understand what he was saying but slowly, the meaning of his half phrased sentences were plain to understand. "You tried to make one…but you couldn't…?" Tony nodded, agreeing with her.

"So what can I do?" Pepper screamed. "What do I do now?"

"Top drawer…" he said, breathing heavily, motioning behind him. Pepper immediately jumped up and opened it but didn't find anything that looked like one of the palladium cartridges she had just seen.

"Syringe…" Tony muttered.

Pepper kept looking frantically until she found a syringe with a green liquid in it. She quickly took and bent down next to Tony. "This? How do I do this, I don't know how…"

Tony dreaded explaining this next part – what the syringe would do. She couldn't just tell her it was a cure – that would be a lie. But if he explained it's true purpose, then she'd force Pepper to make an informed decision, knowing that either way, he was going to die. But he owed her the truth. Finally.

"It's…it's a cure," he said. "But for one week…"

Pepper shook her head. "I don't understand, it's a cure? Does it work? Why one week? Do you need more of it?"

Tony shook his head. "It helps for one week…"

"Then what? What happens after a week?"

"That's it…" he said. "It…nothing…it'll stop my heart…" For some reason, Tony considered the statement a euphemism for what it would really do to him.

"It'll…kill you?" Pepper asked hesitantly, hearing what he was saying but refusing to comprehend. Tony slowly nodded his head agreeing, his face contorting in pain.

"No…no, I'm not going to…" she shook her head, determined that she wasn't going to do this. Why would he even ask her to do this? Ask her to kill him? But when she saw his entire body clench suddenly and the half scream, half moan of pain he let out, she understood why.

"What happens if I don't give it to you?" Pepper asked, trying to weigh her options. She couldn't just kill him.

Tony tried to catch his breath, whimpering. "Five hours," he said. "Five hours…"

"What happens in five hours?" she asked, though she already knew the answer. Tony simply shook his head lightly in reply.

"So for the next five hours…you'll be like this?" She leaned back, her back resting on the table leg of her desk and rested her hand on the side of her face, inspecting the syringe she was holding. She couldn't do this. How could she make herself do this? "Tony, I can't," she said, her eyes watering. How could he make her do this?

Tony looked at her, his eyes pleading and Pepper couldn't stop the tears from flowing freely now. Looking at him like this, not only vulnerable, but literally on the brink of death and in pain…either way he was going to die. And either way it was going to be her fault. He didn't verbally ask her to do it, beg her to do it, but he wanted her to do it and that was all that mattered. He wanted to give her the choice but really, there wasn't one.

"Oh, God…" Pepper gasped, crying as she looked at him, and then at the syringe. "Tony…I can't…please…"

"Pepper…" he gasped, rolling onto his side and attempting to crawl towards her. "Help me."

She shook her head, slowly at first but growing more and more emphatic. Yet, though she didn't want to, and was saying she wasn't going to, she took the syringe and held on to him, knowing she had to. "God, Tony…Tony, please. I can't…" She held the syringe in position but was uncertain where to place it.

"Anywhere," he muttered, but he motioned towards his neck. Anywhere on his neck.

She placed the tip of the syringe about two inches beneath the tip of his ear, still shaking her head. "Tony, please…I can't do it, I can't do it…Please, Tony, don't make me do it…"

He was heaving now, trying to take in air and he held on to Pepper's free hand. _Do it, please, do it. I can't stand this anymore…_

She withdrew the syringe and rested her head on his shoulder, crying. "Tony…Tony, I can't!" He only nodded. "Yes, yes, you can…" he said, sorry for doing this to her; for forcing her to make this decision. It wasn't fair. This wasn't supposed to be her job.

Pepper gently rested her hand on his face, looking at him. There had to be another option. Take him to the hospital? What could they do for him? They didn't know how to deal with arc reactor technology. And with only five hours left, there was nothing they could do. It was five hours of pain before death, or a week of comfort before death. The best option was simple but hard to carry out. Again, she placed the syringe on his neck, refusing to look. Her head remained buried into his shoulder. "Tony…I'm sorry."

"Not sorry…don't be sorry…" he told her, waiting for the prick that would determine his fate.

As she pushed the needle into him and slowly ejected the liquid into his body she cried, she sobbed, and she hated herself for what she was doing. She knew it was the better thing to do but was it right? Was it any better to watch him die in pain? It wasn't fair. The arc reactor was supposed to help him, but instead, it had killed him.

Her head still rested on his shoulder and she noticed his breathing had slowed down and wasn't as labored. Already, the "cure" had begun its work. The pain was leaving him and as his body returned to balance, his eyes closed slightly and exhaustion took over.

"Thank you…" he whispered, his grip on her hand loosening and Pepper was forced to look at him and accept the fact that she had just killed him. And his response to the fact? He had just thanked her. "Thank you."

"Tony?" she whispered after a minute. His eyes were closed and his mouth open slightly. "Tony?" she shook his shoulder and when he didn't wake up, she quickly felt his neck for a pulse. She relaxed slightly when she felt the light pressure and stared at him, still unable to accept what she had just done. Angrily, she threw the empty syringe across the room and heard it fall to the ground somewhere on the other side of the workshop. What had she _done_? This wasn't moral, ethical…was it even right? What would have been the "moral" thing? To watch him die? All she had done was delayed death which was definitely a good thing. So why did she feel like a murderer?

She looked at the unconscious Tony Stark. He couldn't stay here. But how was she supposed to carry him up the stairs and over to his bedroom? Should she call Rhodey to help her out? No, she couldn't do that. She'd have to tell Rhodey the truth about Tony's condition and what she had done. She wasn't ready for that. Instead she left and ran upstairs and gathered a bundle of blankets and pillows. In less than two minutes, she was back down again and she arranged the blankets on the floor beside him, shoving the palladium cartridges aside. Once finished, she gently moved him on top of the blankets she had laid down, doing her very best to not hurt him in the process. The entire time, she continued to cry.

"I'm sorry, Tony," she said, even though he couldn't hear her. She didn't care if he was grateful, or if she had done the right thing. It still hurt. And now, Tony had seven days to live.

The countdown began.

**That's this chapter. I think it's shorter than the last but I thought it was a decent place to end. Please review! They mean so much to me! And now…now I need to go write a lab report for my AP Biology class (annoying since the AP exam is already over. What's the point?)**

**Anyway, review please and tell me what you think or like or don't like! Thank you so much! I'll try to update soon.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you for the reviews! You guys are awesome! :) I went and watched Iron Man 2 again Thursday night with a couple friends so now I have the movie fresh in my mind for any FF references. Lol, enjoy!**

**Chapter 3**

_**Day 1**_

Pepper had fallen asleep on the floor of the workshop, her head resting on one of the table legs. Now, she woke up groggily, trying to get her mind to catch up. Why was she asleep in the shop? And what were all these cartridges on the floor—in a quick rush, all the information stored in the back of her mind from last night rushed back and she felt a sharp pain in her chest as the knowledge was restored. Tony was dying – that's what had happened, or at least that's what she had found out.

For a moment, she just sat there, the hurt and the pain returning along with the memory. And she hesitantly turned her head to see if he was still asleep on the floor. The blankets she had set out the night before weren't there though. He lay on his back on the cold, hard floor, face up, and completely still. Too still. She shifted toward him, worried, and immediately, fear took hold. He was deathly pale.

"Tony?" She shook his shoulder lightly, praying to whoever could hear that he would wake up. He remained frighteningly still and he was cold.

"Tony! Tony!" Pepper grew increasingly frantic as she tried to wake him up. In the back of her mind, she was processing the information – he was still, cold and pale. There was no waking up. But that didn't make her stop doing everything she could think of to wake him up. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be dead. He had told her that the shot she had given him last night was supposed to prolong his life for another week.

_But what if he lied?_

"Tony!" No he couldn't have lied. He wouldn't—

_He's been lying to you all along. For months, maybe. He never told you about the palladium poisoning. That he was going to die._

But that was different. He wouldn't lie to her about this, he wasn't heartless. "God…Tony, wake up! Can you hear me? Wake up! Tony! Tony!"

_He lied to you. It wasn't a cure. It killed him before his time and kept him from the pain. He lied to you and you killed him._

No...she didn't, _he_ didn't. But he still wasn't awake and Pepper's screams were doing nothing to bring him back. She stopped suddenly, still in shock and moved back, her eyes wide open in terror, breathing heavily. Oh, God…Tony…

He still hadn't moved, hadn't said anything. He wasn't breathing…he wasn't doing anything. She thought about how people believed dead people looked like they were asleep or finally resting. But Tony didn't look like he was sleeping. He looked…_dead_.

He was gone. And he had lied to her. Again.

* * *

Pepper yelped and her eyes shot open instantly. She sat up, breathing fast. _It's not real, it's not real, it's not…_ she stopped when she realized where she was. She wasn't at home and she definitely wasn't in Tony's workshop where she remembered falling asleep. Instead, she was alone in Tony's room. In Tony's _bed_ to be precise. She held on to the covers, looking around and trying to gather as much information as possible. She was in the same clothes she had worn yesterday and her shoes were lined up in the corner. Still, she didn't remember how she had gotten there. Had Tony _carried_ her here last night?

Outside the room, she heard yelling that had to be all the way down the hallway and she quietly slipped out of the bed and opened the door just a crack so she could hear and see what was going on. Tony was fully dressed, pacing back and forth and arguing with someone on the phone, a cup of coffee in his hand.

"Yes, well, that's _exactly_ what my problem is. I don't have time for all this crap, so I need you to accept the changes. You have your signatures, so approve it," Tony argued, setting aside the coffee and kneading his forehead. He looked exhausted and he had dark circles around his eyes.

"Okay, okay, okay," Tony continued. "Stop…stop…why are you still talking, you're not listening to me--" He rolled his eyes and tapped his fingers on the table for a moment before interrupting again. "Okay, just shut up. Right now. Stop talking. I don't have _time_ for two weeks, okay? You might have time, which is great, okay? But I don't. So I need my will approved _now_."

His will. He was working on his will, Pepper finally realized and the thought stung. _This is my fault. He has to write his will because of me_. She knew this was illogical. It was because of her he was able to write his will to begin with. He'd be dead right now if she hadn't done what she had.

"You're still not listening to me, why don't you listen to me? What – okay, shut up. Listen, I will throw in…half a million dollars bonus if you get this damn thing approved in twenty four hours. What do you mean, you can't do that? This is ridiculous, see, _now_ you made me angry. Now I'm mad." Tony stood up and took a swig out of his coffee cup. "I'm mad. Too late, you made me angry…no, I'm actually getting my ass down there right now to yell at you in person to see just what the problem is…don't even _try_ and apologize…"

Tony hung up and threw his phone aside, cursing. He rested both his hands on the high table in the kitchen and massaged his temple and Pepper wondered just how much sleep he had gotten the night before. He drew his hand over his face and rested his head in his hand, staring at nothing in particular for a moment but Pepper could easily see the wheels in his head turning. Quietly and sadly, Pepper walked back over to the bed and under the covers and stared at the sheets. She didn't want to leave, to face reality, to face the time Tony had left. Maybe if she stayed here, alone, the pain she was feeling would numb.

The door opened and Pepper's head shot up. Tony stopped at the door. "Oh," he said suddenly and Pepper said nothing. "Did I wake you up?" he asked a little sheepishly but still she said nothing. "Sorry," he added but was faced with Pepper's silence.

He scratched his head and curled his lip, not entirely sure how to respond. "Uhmm…I'm…going…out…" he said. Then deciding that that sounded stupid he added, "I'm…going to talk to my lawyer…do you…ah…need anything?"

Silence.

"Okay…if you need to go anywhere, Happy's outside…and..."

Again, he scratched his head, not really knowing what to say since he was getting _zero_ reaction. This was hard enough, but he needed feedback. "Ah—mmm…okay…listen…thank you for…for last night, for being there and --- I'm sorry. For not telling you before."

Some apology. And still, Pepper was just looking at him, her expression completely unreadable and blank. If he hadn't known any better, he'd say she was just apathetic.

"Okay," Tony said for the hundredth time. "I'm going to--" he motioned behind him and finally muttered, "I'll be back…in an hour," before leaving Pepper alone in his room. Even after he had left, Pepper continued to stare at the door where he had been, and the first tear that she had kept hidden fell down the side of her face.

Tony grabbed his keys and rushed out of the house, hating himself. He had done this, made this mess. Maybe if he had told her ahead of time, she wouldn't be in so much shock. Now she was angry, terrified and feeling guilty. It wasn't her fault…maybe he shouldn't have called her last night. He should have just suffered through the pain, left her out of it altogether so she wouldn't have to deal with the guilt. But how would she have taken it? Finding him dead the next day in his workshop? No…he should've told her weeks ago. What he had done yesterday was nowhere near fair. No amount of apologizing was going to fix it.

* * *

Ten minutes later, Pepper was downstairs in the shop. "JARVIS?"

_Yes, Ms. Potts?_

"I want every record and information regarding Tony's rapidly declining condition on the home screen."

_Ms. Potts, I'm not entirely sure…_

"JARVIS, I don't have time for this. I have less than one hour to figure this out."

_Mr. Stark would prefer I didn't disclose any of this information._

"Did Tony specifically_ tell_ you not to tell me anything? Or to keep anything from me?"

_No, Ms. Potts, but it was implied multiple times._

Pepper couldn't believe she was arguing with a computer. And yet, this definitely wasn't the first time. "Unless Tony told you not to tell me anything, I don't think you're breaking any of his instructions. Give me the information."

_Yes, Ms. Potts_.

Pepper prepared herself for the influx of information that appeared on the many screens surrounding the workshop and was amazed at all the information there was. She didn't have time to read any of this. But one particular screen caught her attention. A chart and dozens of mathematical calculations she didn't understand were scattered all over it. "What's this page? The one with the chart and formulas." She read one of the formulas out loud.

_One of the many unviable substitutions for the palladium in the arc reactor. _

"How many has he tried?"

_109 different elements and combinations of elements have been tested either theoretically or physically to date._

"Oh, God…" Pepper said aloud. "And nothing worked?"

_All trials have proved to be inadequate._

"How long has he been searching for a new substitute?"

_Three months and seventeen days._

"And how long has he known about the problems with palladium?"

_Three months and eighteen days_.

Pepper was speechless. So for over three months, he had known he was dying. He tried everything in his power and nothing had worked. She could finally understand the defeat he had faced, the hopelessness. And he had faced it alone. Did no one else know of his condition? Did Rhodey know?

And Tony had chosen to keep it all from her.

Did he think it was better that way; to keep her completely clueless? Did he not trust her?

She looked at the rest of the screens, not understanding any of the mathematical mumbo jumbo she was faced with. "What's the significance of blood toxicity?" she asked, glancing at the word.

_The percent of poisoning caused by the palladium that has reached his blood stream._

"Duh," Pepper thought to herself, feeling stupid for asking. "84% toxicity…what is--?"

_That would be the last reading Tony took at approximately eight thirty two last night._

"How bad is that?"

_Blood toxicity increases at a relatively exponential rate with a five to fifteen percent fluctuation due to environmental chances and stress. At a level of 84% toxicity, it was estimated that he had at least two weeks._

"Until?"

_Until his blood toxicity reached ninety seven percent, which might as well be one hundred percent._

"But he didn't have two weeks," Pepper rationalized. "Last night he almost died. Tony's math is never wrong."

_Apparently, sometimes it is._

Pepper would have laughed had it been any other day. But she was angry that the one time she wanted Tony to be right, he wasn't. "What's the shot I gave him yesterday? The solution in the syringe? And how does it work?"

_A formal name has yet to be designated for the solution. It works against all the symptoms caused by the palladium poisoning and decreases his blood toxicity by approximately fifty point two percent. However, four days after receiving the injection, the symptoms will return and his blood toxicity levels will increase at an unprecedented rate. Over three times as fast as before and exponentially. Levels of toxicity should reach ninety seven percent in seven days. _

"And will it…hurt…when he…?" Pepper couldn't bring herself to say the word 'die'. Tony didn't just 'die', though recent events proved otherwise.

_Mr. Stark's degeneration will be completely painless. And he will most likely pass away in his sleep. _

So that was it. There was no cure, no hope, no extraordinary concoction that would reverse everything. Not even the great Tony Stark had been able to figure this out; all roads had led to a dead end. And seven days later, she would walk into his room and find him dead.

So what was the primary point of the solution anyway, if he was going to die anyway? To prevent the pain or to give him time? Time to do what? Set things right…

Another realization dawned on Pepper as she stared at all the records surrounding her. Time to set things right. And isn't that what he had been doing, for weeks? He had given away his entire art collection to the…_Boy_ _Scouts_. Not sold them, but had given them away. And the Stark Expo. A virtually unprofitable and unnecessary idea and he was determined to go through with it anyway. And his talk about…_legacy_. He had suddenly gone off on this legacy tangent…that was the only point with the Stark Expo. And…

"Oh, God," she said, realizing something else. She took the seat behind her as her brain went through an information overload.

He had even made her the CEO of the company. She was supposed to take his place when he died. That was why he had suddenly made her CEO. To make sure the company was under control when he was gone. To replace him. He had even said that he had been thinking about appointing a successor. A successor…already? She hadn't even processed the information because she was in shock at the news. And then he'd gotten just self destructive and thrill seeking; like when he'd suddenly decided to drive his own racecar and his birthday party. His _birthday_ party…he had gone crazy. His last birthday – that's why he had acted the way he had. He had known it would be the last time he would celebrate his party. And before, in the plane, he had wanted to cancel his party.

Jesus…the plane. He was going to tell her the truth on the plane, but she had been too focused on the recent events at the race track she hadn't even thought about it. And what had she told him? _Not everyone runs on batteries, Tony_. She hadn't realized that his own batteries were about to shut down. And all he had done was smile half heartedly, still saying nothing. Tony had been giving her all these hints. He'd been giving the entire world all these hints, and no one had caught it.

Pepper pulled open one of the drawers in his desk, looking for the palladium batteries but instead she found a single envelope with a single name written on it.

_Pepper._

She was about to open it when JARVIS warned her, _Mr. Stark has just arrived, Ms. Potts_.

Quickly, she put the letter back where she had found it and picked up the blankets and pillows that were still on the floor of the workshop. With the bedding in her hand, she walked back up the stairs, refusing to make any eye contact with Tony but secretly wondering why he was back so early. Had he decided to not see his lawyer after all?

"Pepper?" Tony called after her as she walked past him to put away the spare pillows and blankets. She didn't respond.

"Pepper…can we talk?" She ignored him and continued to put away things, pretending as if he wasn't even there. She didn't mean to seem so heartless, but she knew if she stopped what she was doing and focused all her attention on him, she'd break down and start crying. She didn't want to do that. She continued to do some minor housekeeping as Tony attempted to explain, apologize or at least say something.

"Can we stay still?" he suggested, still following her around the house. "I don't know…maybe sit down? Because I feel like I'm running a marathon or talking to a wall when I'm running after you like this…hey, hey," he took her hand and finally Pepper stayed still, but focused her eyes on the ground, still refusing to make eye contact. "Come on," he pleaded. In agreement, Pepper dropped down on the sofa behind them and said nothing and finally dared to look at him, her face still downcast.

"I'm…sorry for not telling you," Tony started hesitantly. "But that goes without saying—even though I just did…but that's not the point…what I mean…what I'm…I didn't…_want_…to tell you. Well, at first!" Tony tried to defend himself feebly. "At first…I didn't want to because I…I thought I could…come up with something…but I didn't. So…I thought I had time…which was wrong…my math was wrong…it's a long story, but I owe it to you…later..mm…" He hadn't really thought about what he was going to say and now that he was saying it, none of it was making any sense. Pepper still had said nothing to him and he was having the hard time getting an expression. "Pepper, I feel like I'm talking to a sphinx, I don't know what you're thinking – I need some feedback."

Tony was sure he felt her slap before he heard it – he had no idea her hand could move so fast. His cheek started burning, but he only grimaced slightly. Well…there was his feedback. "Well…at least we're getting somewhere," he decided, hoping it wouldn't earn him another slap.

_Now_ he could tell what she was thinking. The emotion was escaping through her eyes and her quivering lips. "When were you going to tell me?" she asked him, trying to hold in the tears. "Did you even plan on telling me?"

"I was going to tell you on the plane--"

"Was I supposed to walk in one day and find you dead? Was that your plan?"

"I made an omelette…and I was going to tell you…"

"When you made me an _omelette_? That's the best time you could think of?"

"Well, I was going to take you to Venice."

"I don't want to go to Venice!"

"You didn't want to go before either, so I didn't say anything. You were mad."

"I'm mad now!"

"But I didn't want you to worry unnecessarily."

"You didn't want me to worry?"

"Well…no…"

"Tony, do you even know what I felt when I walked in there last night?" she told him, finally silencing him. "I didn't know what was going on…I thought you were hurt. And then you told me what happened, the _truth_. That you were dying."

"Pepper…"

"And then you told me what the solution was for…and how it worked and what it would do…"

"Pepper," he pleaded, not wanting her to continue.

"And then I had to choose to give it to you. And I had no heads up, no knowledge of what was going on, I just hoped I was doing the right thing--"

"I'm sorry for not telling you, I should have told you. It wasn't fair--"

That one earned another hot slap across the _other_ cheek which seemed to sting even more. This time, Tony complained. "You really need to give me some sort of warning before you do that again."

"It had nothing to do with _fair_, Tony," she told him. "I keep thinking, what if I didn't pick up? Or get your call at all? Would I have walked in the next day, gone to your shop and found you on the floor? What do you think I would've felt if something happened and I knew I could have done something but hadn't?"

"No, what I did to you wasn't fair at all. I shouldn't have let you make that decision, that isn't your responsibility. That shouldn't be anyone's responsibility except for mine. And I dragged you into it. I shouldn't have even called you."

"So that I can find you dead the next morning?"

"What I did by calling you, was make you think me dying is somehow your fault. No matter what happens, it's not your fault. I couldn't find a substitute for the palladium. That's what killed me. It had nothing to do with you."

Pepper only nodded once, still not entirely convinced. "So is that what everything's about, then? Giving everything away, the expo, making me CEO…?"

Tony only nodded slightly. "But I _want_ you to be CEO, I trust you to do it."

"You gave Rhodey your suit," she stated plainly.

"Actually, in my defense he _took_ it, I didn't just give it to him."

"You let him take it. Does Rhodey even know? Did you tell him?"

"I didn't _tell_ him anything. He figured something was up with the arc reactor but he didn't know that I was running out of time and options."

Pepper nodded once. "So you told no one?"

"Yeah, I didn't tell anyone. I didn't think it made a difference if I told anyone or not, it's not going to change anything. But--"

Pepper had already swung her hand to slap his cheek _again_ but this time, Tony caught it mid swing. "I'm getting better at this," he told her but she didn't take the joke. She yanked her hand away about to protest but Tony interrupted. "I was _going_ to say that I was wrong and that I should have told you. I know I messed up. I'm sorry. And I know apologizing doesn't change anything."

Pepper knew she should give him a break and accept his apology. But she was still angry and worst of all, scared. She didn't want to think of anything that would happen after one week. She wasn't sure how she'd be able to function without him around. To walk into his home and know he wasn't there. She shook the idea out of her mind.

"You know Rhodey's taking the suit to the military," Pepper pointed out.

"Yes, that's actually the point – they can finally have their suit now that I'm…" he trailed off, refusing to finish his sentence.

Pepper didn't say anything for a moment. Finally she asked, "So what now?"

"Well, I finally convinced my lawyer to approve the changes to my will on the way over so I didn't have to go and--"

"No, I mean…what now," she repeated. "This week."

Tony pursed his lip for a moment. "_I_…still want to go Venice."

"Tony…" she sighed.

"I understand if you don't want to go. And you don't have to--"

"No, it's not that I don't want to go--"

"Yeah, well you said about…ten seconds ago that you didn't want to go to Venice."

"I didn't mean it, I was angry."

"Okay, so do you want to go? We can leave in three hours; I can call the plane--"

"I haven't even said anything yet--"

"Okay, go ahead. Shoot."

Pepper sighed. "Tony…are you sure you want to leave?"

"What's wrong with leaving?"

"Nothing…just, do you want to leave now?"

"Yes, actually I wanted to leave ages ago--"

"But is now really the best time to take a trip to the other side of the world?"

"You mean the company? Well…no…considering—but you _are_ entitled to--"

This time, her hand made it to the side of his face. _Slap! _Tony exhaled loudly, rubbing his cheek. "You really…really need to stop doing that."

"Do you think I care about the company right now?" she asked him angrily.

"I…yeah, probably not. Now, I'm really confused, if you don't want to go to Venice all you have to do is say so. You don't need to make excuses."

"I'm not making excuses, I'm just saying that…going to Venice might not be the best thing for you to do…now. To leave home…in case, something…happens…Do you want to be away if something happens?"

He sighed, finally understanding what she was getting at. She was worried that if he went to Venice, he wouldn't come back home in time, if he wanted to. She wanted him to understand that if they left, he wasn't going to make it home in time to fix or change anything, to get anything done. He was going to die there. Was he ready to leave home for good?

"Yes, Pepper, I know that."

Her lip twitched and she stood up. "Will that be all, Mr. Stark?" she asked him, sadly.

"That'll be all Ms. Potts."

**Ummm---yaaa. So this chapter was a little over 4000 words which is how long my chapters usually are (at least for my other story). Lol…I hope the beginning didn't scare you too much. Please leave a review. You guys are awesome! And I'll see you guys later! :) **


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_**Day 1, 6:00 P.M**_

"Tony!" Pepper called out as she made her way down to his workshop. "Tony, the plane's been waiting for over an hour!" She entered in her pass code and let herself in. "Tony--"

She stood at the door and Tony looked up from what he was doing behind his desk and immediately, all the screens in his workshop, once full of life, all shut down in less than two seconds flat.

"What are you doing?" she asked, suspicious.

"Nothing," Tony said all too quickly as he messed with his keyboard for a second before shutting it down too.

"What are you working on?"

"Nothing," he said as he picked something up and stuffed it in his pocket. "Why are we still here?" he deflected. "Come on, I thought you said we're late."

"No, wait, but you were working on something--" Pepper said, pointing behind her as Tony led her out.

"No, I wasn't."

"Yes, you were."

"No, I wasn't."

"But--"

"I don't get it I thought we were late?" Tony interrupted, doing his best to distract her which Pepper did not like one bit.

"Are you hiding things from me again? What aren't you telling me now?" she demanded, growing frustrated. Her frustration disappeared though once she reached upstairs. She rolled her eyes. "And why haven't you even started packing?"

"What do I need to pack for? I'll buy everything when I get there." He squinted at her a little. "_You_ didn't pack, did you?"

"Of course I did!"

"Why would you do something like that?" He asked, as if it was the craziest concept he'd ever heard. He grabbed his keys and sunglasses and made his way toward the door. "Come on, let's go!"

"Wait, but--"

"I thought we were late! You're the one who wanted to leave quickly," he smiled at her frustration and refused to slow down. "Don't bring anything!"

"Can we at least stop by my house? I need to pick up--"

"Don't pick up anything, it's more fun," he yelled after her, rushing her out.

"Did you lock all the doors?"

"JARVIS! Lock up when we leave!"

_Yes, sir._

"Yes, Pepper…the doors are locked."

"And did you remember--"

"JARVIS!" Tony called out again, just as they left the mansion all together. "Remember everything I forgot!"

_Of course, sir_.

"See?" Tony said, opening the front door of his car for Pepper. "I remembered everything."

"You can't even lock your own door with a key," she said, rolling her eyes. Pepper stopped once outside, looking around. "Where's Happy?" she asked suspiciously.

"He took a break. I'm driving."

"What?"

"Scared?" Tony taunted.

Pepper frowned slightly. "Fine," Pepper agreed reluctantly as she stepped into the car. "At least put the top up."

Tony closed the door behind her before answering, "No."

"Tony!" Pepper warned him as he started the car. "Why not?"

"You only drive a convertible with the top up when it's raining, look it's a nice day--"

"Tony."

"—the sun is shining--"

"Put the top up."

"Why?"

"Because I do not want a picture of me and you in your convertible to be on the front cover of every newspaper in the nation," Pepper told him honestly. "I already have everyone's eye on me since you appointed me CEO."

Tony didn't say anything at first, as he put the car in gear, but he didn't put the top up either. "Does it matter that much to you what they think?"

"Uh…no…but--" she said hesitantly.

"Besides," he said. "In a week, everyone will have their explanation, won't they?"

Pepper felt like crying. He was right. Who cared what anyone thought now? When one week later he wasn't going to be around anyway? "I'm sorry, Tony."

"For what?" he asked, honestly surprised. "So can I leave the top down? And how far is it to the drop zone?"

"Uh…about fifteen minutes--"

Tony floored it and Pepper slammed into her seat, glaring at him. _This_ was why she never entered a car with him driving.

* * *

"I take it you haven't even booked any rooms yet," Pepper told him, mentally checking things off mentally.

"That's too far down the road; I'll do that in the plane."

"Actually, it's in a couple hours and knowing you all the hotels you'll be interested in all want reservations at least a week in advance."

"I never make reservations anyway and I still get a hotel room."

"That's because, _I_ make the reservations. And why do you keep saying 'room'? As in singular? You don't honestly think I'm going to--"

"When I say _room_, I mean _suite_ by default. And when I mean _suite_ that's always multiple rooms. Not just one…unless you _want_ just one."

"No, thank you," said firmly but with a hint of playfulness in her tone.

"I can see the headlines now. _Pepper Potts – climbing the ladder of success the old fashioned way._"

"Tony…"

"Although I guess you're already at the top of the ladder so there's no need to--"

"Tony!"

"Alright, alright, I'm just kidding," Tony quickly added, smirking. He made the final turn towards his plane and rolled his eyes as soon as he had. Great. Just what he needed.

"Uh…Tony, who's that?" Pepper asked as the two of them got out of the car. A man with his arms folded across his chest seemed to be waiting for him outside the plane. But what caught Pepper off guard the most was the eyepatch covering his left eye.

"No one, just ignore him," Tony quickly said, locking the car and making his way toward the plane.

"And where do you think you're going?" Nick Fury asked him, about two dozen meters in front of the steps of the plane.

"Business trip," Tony answered walking right past him. Pepper quickly caught up to Tony walking past the strange man with the eye patch.

"Who is he?" Pepper whispered, looking back slightly.

"Doesn't matter, don't make eye contact," Tony said, still walking ahead. Immediately, Pepper's head whipped away.

"Seriously, where do you think you're going?" Fury repeated, walking behind him. Pepper had the sudden urge to sprint over to the plane but hid her fear and remained at Tony's side. Tony turned around to face him.

"Well, it's already hard to take _you_ seriously, with that…thing…always on," Tony said, motioning at his eye.

"What happened to not making eye contact?" Pepper whispered. All she wanted to do was leave. And how did Tony know him anyway?

"You're not leaving," Fury said. "Not anytime soon. You've got some _real_ business to take care of."

"I'm not joining your boy band," Tony said with the straightest face.

"This isn't about the Initiative. This is about _you_ getting back to work."

"In case you weren't paying attention, I _am_ going to work. Business trip. I don't know what work you're talking about."

Fury smiled and Pepper's lip quivered. "I think we need to talk," Fury said.

"No, we don't," Tony said just as he turned towards his plane. He stopped immediately and his head tilted to the side in confusion and disbelief. Natalie Rushman, his new P.A, was dragging the unconscious body of Tony's pilot out of the cockpit and into the open.

"Uh…" Pepper started, not really sure what to make of all this considering Natalie was dressed in a tight fitting cat suit. She glanced at Tony who was still staring at her, his head tilted. She frowned, despite the entire situation and had the sudden urge to step on his foot.

"She's…" Tony said, looking for the word. "Fired."

"What's going on?" Pepper asked aloud, finally finding it in her to face Fury.

"I think we need to talk," Fury said, not even sparing Natalie or Pepper a glance.

Tony turned around to face Fury, raising his arms, palm up as if to surrender. "I don't know what you want. I am not joining your…your little group and you're going to wake up my pilot, so I can get to the other side of the world in less than sixteen hours."

"Tony, who is he?" Pepper asked, desperately wanting some sort of explanation. She hated being ignored.

"He's Nick Fury he wants me to join his little boy group and Natalie--" he turned to look at Natalie who was coming down the plane steps with the pilot on her left shoulder. She walked past both Tony and Pepper without a single glance and stopped outside Fury's van. She opened the door with one hand and half threw, half dropped Tony's pilot into the car. Pepper blinked once and then stared at Tony who only looked at Natalie. "Yeah, and I have no idea who the hell _she_ is. _That_ business is all relatively new."

"Why are you leaving, Tony?" Fury asked. "What business do you have to take care of?"

"Does it really matter?"

"Considering your condition it doesn't really matter at all what your plans are."

Tony clenched his jaw, glaring at him. He _definitely_ didn't like where this was going and he _definitely_ didn't like how he always seemed to know what was going on. Why couldn't he go bother someone else?

"How about…we turn around, go back to your home, and talk there?" Fury suggested.

He was right in the sense that there was no point in just hanging around an unpiloted plane in the one hundred degree weather. Tony made sure Fury could easily see how pissed off he was. He was not supposed to be wasting his time running around in circles just because Fury felt like playing tag. Tony yanked his keys from his pocket and unlocked his car doors before making his way towards his car. Pepper followed him, still looking back at Nick Fury.

"I don't get it, what does he want?" Pepper whispered even though they were meters away. "And how does he know about the palladium?"

"I don't know, but he's not going to leave me alone until he gets what he wants," Tony said angrily as he put his car into gear.

"How do you know?"

"Because he's been hunting me down for six months."

Pepper's eyes widened. "Why didn't you say anything? Why don't you _ever_ say anything?"

"Because I didn't take him seriously. Didn't I already say that?"

"But you're taking him seriously now. Why now?"

"Because I need my pilot back and I can't fly a plane," Tony answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Absorb and deflect, Pepper. I'll let him talk, digest it, spit it back at him, and get my pilot back. Everybody wins."

"Right…" Pepper said. "Because it always works out like that."

* * *

"You need to get yourself together, Tony," Nick Fury told him as he, Tony and Pepper were seated at one of the tables in the house. Natalie was…well, Tony had no idea where she was and he couldn't help but worry she was taking pictures of his workshop and sending it to the FBI. Or Russia.

"Hey, I'm together, alright?" Tony said, arguing with Fury. "_I'm_ fine. _You're_ the one who needs to leave me alone."

"Oh, I can tell you're fine. You want to know how I can tell? I can tell because you're giving away all your stuff, you let Rhodey take your suit, and you made your P.A your CEO."

"Okay, first, it was an _art _collection. I gave away an _art_ collection because I didn't want it. And I didn't _let_ Rhodey take my suit. He _stole_ it."

"And your P.A is now the CEO?"

"I'm right here, you know," Pepper said, not liking that Fury was acknowledging her presence.

"I knew she'd make a good CEO. What, I can't appoint my own CEO, now? Since when was that illegal?"

"Don't play games with me, Tony," Fury warned.

"I'm not playing games, you're--"

"_You_ are sick and dying. And you need to figure out what's going on so you can get your ass up."

"Yeah, well, it's a little too late for that," Tony said and Pepper could see the honest sadness in his eyes.

"I don't think it is."

"Hey, look, I know you took a two or three week break before you resumed your little stalking experiences, but just to clue you in, there isn't anything _left_. And even if there is, I don't have time for it. I only have six days to live and I don't intend to spend that time looking for a magic cure."

Nick Fury nodded once without any sign of consolation or sympathy. "Then I guess this is going to be a very important week for you, now isn't it?"

Tony laughed dryly. "I have tried every element known to man, every combination of elements I can come up with to replace the palladium. _Nothing_ has worked. There is _nothing_ _left_."

Suddenly, a metal box labeled HOWARD STARK was dropped on the table in front of them suddenly and both Tony and Pepper jumped up simultaneously. Natalie stood over it. "There's something left. And this should help you find it." With that, she walked away from the table and down towards Tony's workshop.

"I don't like how she's going down there," Tony said simply.

"You hired her," Pepper retorted.

"Yeah, and then I fired her, why is she still here?"

"Natasha's staying whether you like it or not," Fury said.

"Natasha? Hmm," Tony said, as if unimpressed. "What's next? I bet she doesn't speak Latin. _Or _Russian."

"Her name's Natasha _Romanoff_," Fury informed him.

"Yeah, well, now she's also a Russian spy. _And_ Italian. She speaks Italian doesn't she? I bet she's spying on you," he said to Fury. "She's like a triple agent…You know, I never liked her."

Pepper scoffed. "Yes, you did."

"Did not," he argued.

"Tony, you are the worst judge of character _and_ you couldn't stop ogling her."

"So I couldn't stop ogling her, that doesn't mean I _liked_ her. You didn't like her either."

"That's not true…"

"Now you're on the defensive--"

"_You_ were just on the defensive--"

"So are you going to get to work on finding a permanent solution or not?" Fury interrupted, rolling his eye.

"Not," Tony said simply and Pepper looked at him. He refused to make an eye contact with her; instead, staring straight ahead, right past Fury. She desperately wanted him to give it another shot, but she couldn't ask that of him. He only had a week left, and he deserved to enjoy that time and spend it the way he wanted to. And if he did use his time to look for a cure and ended up not finding one, it would be a waste. It wasn't fair to ask him and the least she could do was respect his wishes. But a part of her wanted him to try anyway. She wanted that miracle.

"So that's it then?" Fury asked. "You're just going to take it lying down?"

"Hey, I didn't take it lying down, I've been looking for over three months," Tony said, his anger rising.

"Yeah, you looked," Fury agreed. "And _then_ you killed yourself."

Tony frowned. How the hell did he know about that? "What?"

"You looked, and then you invented that thing of yours to finish the job for you, give you a week. And then you decided to drag Ms. Potts here into the business to administer your little 'cure'--"

"Stop it," Tony warned him.

"Tony…" Pepper reassured him, not liking where this was going.

"So now you're dying, she feels guilty--" Fury prodded.

"Watch it--"

"You know you at least owe it to her to try something else."

Tony slammed his hand on the table and then pointed his finger at Fury. "Stop it!" he yelled, angrily. No, he was beyond anger now. He had no right to say _any_ of that shit. Did he honestly think that Tony had _wanted_ to call her last night and tell her to kill him? It hadn't been easy and he didn't need him sticking all of this in his face. He leaned back, resting his chin on his hand.

Pepper wanted to smack this Nick Fury guy across his face, but most of all she wanted to tell Tony that none of that was true…even if it would have been a lie. She didn't feel guilty per se. She felt terrible, depressed, but not guilty. And Tony most certainly didn't owe her anything.

"Why don't we have a little chat, Pepper?" Fury said, finally speaking to her.

_No, thank you_, she thought to herself, but she stood up hesitantly to follow him. She glanced at Tony and desperately wanted to say something but instead, put her head down and followed Fury out of the room.

"On a scale of one to ten, how evil do you think I am right now?" Fury asked once they had left the room.

_Ten thousand_. _To infinity._ "Why did you do that?" Pepper asked him instead, growing bolder.

"Was any part of what I said true?"

"No," she lied. "And even if it was, it didn't make it fair."

"The people need him, and he needs to find a solution."

"He's _tried_!" Pepper said angrily. What part of that did he not understand?

"And _you_ need to convince him to try harder."

Pepper hesitated. She hadn't expected this turn of events. "Me?"

"You're the only one who's going to convince him to start looking again."

She shook her head; slowly at first but growing more and more emphatic. "No! No, you can't make me do that to him, that isn't right…that isn't fair…"

"You'll be saving his life."

"_If_ it works. He's been trying for months, there could be nothing left and you want me to tell him to use his last week to keep looking anyway? I can't do that to him."

"_You_ want him to keep looking," Fury said, turning the tables. "Forget about what you think is fair or what's going to make him feel better now. What if there is something out there? And you're willing to let him just let it _go_?"

"It doesn't matter what I want, this has nothing to do with me! This is his decision! And I'm not going to influence--"

"Even if it saves his life?"

"What if it doesn't?"

"What if it does?" Fury said back, raising an eyebrow.

Pepper folded her arms across her chest, suddenly feeling cold. How could he ask her to do this? If she convinced him to keep looking, and he did and failed, how was she supposed to live with herself, knowing she had given him false hope and then yanked the rug from under him? This was supposed to be _his_ week. He was supposed to do what _he_ wanted. She couldn't take that away from him.

But what if there _was_ something? Then the lost week wouldn't matter.

And what if there wasn't? This was a gamble and she didn't want to pick a side.

"I'll think about--" she looked up but Nick Fury wasn't standing in front of her anymore. He was walking out the door, Natalie…or Natasha, by his side.

For a moment, she didn't go back into the room. She had to go in there and tell him something, and in doing so she'd pick a side – tell him her opinion regarding what he should do with that one week. And she didn't know what to tell him. She didn't know what the right thing to tell him was.

She gently placed her hand on the door handle and let herself in. Tony was still sitting down, his chin rested on his hands and Pepper silently took a seat next to him.

"He…wants me to convince you to keep searching for a substitute," Pepper said, looking down at her hands.

Tony didn't say anything at first. But after half a minute, he asked, "Is anything he said not true?"

Pepper looked at him but he didn't look back. "I don't feel guilty."

"Don't lie to me, Pepper."

"I'm not lying. I feel…bad. But I don't feel guilty."

Tony chuckled dryly. "What's the difference?"

"If I felt guilty, you _would_ owe me. I don't, Tony. You don't owe me anything."

He wasn't convinced. "I shouldn't have called you last night," he said with finality.

"Don't say that…"

"I shouldn't have called you at all. It didn't have to be your decision and I forced you to make it. So now you've got that burden on your shoulders when it shouldn't have been yours to carry--"

"Tony--"

"That's not right. It's not fair…I _do_ owe you--"

"Stop it," Pepper said, grabbing his shoulder and forcing him to look at her. "You don't owe me anything. This is _your_ week. _Your_ choice."

"What do you want?" he asked instead. "Should I…"

"I think it's your choice--"

"Don't give me that, bullshit. I'm asking _you_."

She sighed and closed her eyes, rubbing the side of her face. "I…I want you to give it a shot. And I want you to find something. I want that miracle, but…that's like wanting to win the lottery. I know it's not likely and I what I don't want even more is for you to waste this week. I want you…to do what makes you happy."

Tony leaned back in his seat. "I guess he was right, then."

"Who?"

"Fury. I guess he was right when he said you'd convince me."

"Tony, don't do this just because of what I said," Pepper pleaded. "Please, don't."

"I should at least give it a shot…"

"Tony…you said you didn't want me to feel guilty. And I don't. But I will feel guilty if you try this and it doesn't work. I don't want this to not work."

"But you want me to try."

"No!" Pepper said. She was so confused, torn apart by so many different emotions. "That's…that's not what I want. I just want _something_ to work. I want to see you next week, and the week after, and next year. But I don't know if that's going to happen. And I don't want you to lose the one week you know you have for certain."

Tony laid his finger on the metal box with his father's name on it, wiping some of the dust off. "Then I guess this is going to be one hell of a week, isn't it?"

**More dialogue in this chapter than in the others which I think most of you would like. :) I know this chapter lined up more with the movie but that was the point. Don't worry, I'm not re-writing the movie, lol. It's going to be different. But that's all I can tell you without giving anything away! I hoped you liked this chapter anyway! Please review! Thanks! :) Day 2 is the next update!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hey! :) Thanks so much for the reviews! It means so much! Here's the next update, as promised, lol.. Enjoy!**

**Chapter 5**

_**Day 2, 11:00 a.m**_

Tony really needed to start working if he wanted to get anywhere. But the fact that he had no idea where to start certainly wasn't helping matters. He had been _trying_ to work since last night, and he felt like he was running around in circles. There wasn't much in the box that Fury had left him; only a few notebooks and one or two tapes. He had gone through the notebooks and journals last night but he there was nothing in there that could help him find this mystery cure he needed. For the last hour, the the tape had been rolling on the projector and still, there was nothing in it except for his dad talking about the Stark Expo and how important it was…blah, blah, blah. Yeah, it was important but there was no way he was going to see it if he didn't figure something out. And fast.

He wasn't going to find anything. This was the second day, meaning he had six day left to figure something out. And that wasn't all he had to do in those six days. He had to figure out how to create the new replacement, then _actually_ create it. The planning could take anywhere between a few hours and a few days depending on how complicated the procedure was. And as for the actual creation…that would at least take two days. Minimum.

So why was he sitting here, reading his father's notes, watching some meaningless tape and hoping to find his cure? Even if he did figure it out, he probably wouldn't be able to get it made in time. What was the point of trying if he was doomed to fail? He shouldn't be here doing this. He had more pressing things to take care of before he died. This was useless, going around chasing something he could never catch.

Who was he kidding? He wasn't going to stop looking, stop chasing. And it wasn't because he himself wanted to keep going, but because Pepper did. She wanted him to look because she thought there was something out there. And although she was completely biased and she had no scientific data to back her up, he found himself believing her anyway. And even if he had his doubts, he still wanted to try. For her at least.

And why, to make her happy? If he ended up dying anyway the last thing she'd be is happy. She'd be depressed, and he wouldn't be around to do anything about it.

Maybe he should stop trying now. Tell her it was over, that nothing was left. She could prepare herself for the inevitable this way instead of give her false hope.

_Tony_.

That was what he should be doing. This…what he was _trying_ to do was ridiculous. Impossible. Pointless.

_Tony_.

His head shot up when he realized the voice he was hearing wasn't in his head. He looked up and realized it was his father speaking on the tape. He dropped the notebook he had been looking at and focused his attention on the screen.

"_Tony…you're too young to understand this so I thought I'd put it on film…I built this for you, this represents more than people's inventions. This represents more than my life's work. I'm limited by the technology of my time so I turn this over to you. With this you can change the future. What has always been and always will be my greatest creation…is you."_

The camera rolled for a few seconds before the screen went black completely and Tony sat silently, still staring at the projector.

He believed in him. His father had believed him despite what Tony had thought for years. And here Tony was, literally on the brink of death, telling his father that he was wrong. Tony wasn't going to change the future because he wasn't going to be a part of it. Tony wasn't going to make it to his father's expectations, because he wasn't going to be alive. Tony had wanted to make him proud, and now he was letting him down.

Without even thinking, Tony angrily hurled the notebook in his hand at the wall and it hit one of Tony's machines, causing it to crash to the floor and break into God knew how many pieces. And yet, he wanted to do so much more. He wanted to break apart the workshop, tear everything apart, destroy all his work, because none of it was helping him. He was angry. He hated himself for letting everyone down – his father, Pepper. Everyone. He had failed.

* * *

_**Day 2, 12:00 PM**_

Pepper had just come back from the dry cleaner's and judging by the intact condition most of the house was still in, Tony hadn't left the workshop all day – or night for that matter. Realizing this, she bit her bottom lip, doubt growing. What if there wasn't anything out there? What if she had made a mistake, telling Tony that he should at least try and look for a cure? She was wasting his time; time he could be using to do something _he_ wanted. What she had done wasn't fair at all, it was just downright selfish.

But now what could she do? If she told Tony that he should forget it and spend his remaining time the way he truly wanted to, she would be admitting defeat. And right now, she was the only person providing him with hope, and she knew it. If she gave up, then there truly was nothing out there. So how could she fix the mess she had just created? Telling him to continue his search was pointless. The chance of him actually finding something was almost nonexistent. But telling him to call off the search was admitting failure.

What had she done? She had thought she was helping him…no, no she hadn't. She had known what she had been doing. She had known she was being selfish but had used Fury's demand as an opportunity to back herself up. Even Fury was being selfish, but for his own reasons; reasons she didn't completely understand just yet.

This was no one's choice. No one's decision. This was supposed to be Tony's week. But instead, she had forced him to spend it...no, _waste_ it. She had to tell him something. That was the decent thing to do.

Pepper opened his closet and hung up his clothes. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw that one of the drawers in his dresser was opened and she relaxed slightly. So Tony _had_ been upstairs. She didn't know why it made her feel a little better, but it did; knowing that he hadn't isolated himself completely. She walked over to push the drawer in but before she did, she noticed that there was a stack of envelopes resting inside. The envelopes looked just like the one she had seen addressed to her the day before and her curiosity took over. She picked them up, and went through the envelopes, her heart stopping. _Rhodey, US Military, Stark Industries, The Press_. What were these? And then at the bottom of the stack – _Pepper_.

She wanted to open hers first. Common sense told her that, but her conscience told her not to open _any_. This was still Tony's, and when he wanted to he'd give it to her. Still, she was itching to open one and instead of choosing hers, she pulled out the one addressed to the press, deciding it wouldn't be as private as the others. It was a pathetic compromise but she didn't care.

_The People of America:_

_Yes, it's true. The great Tony Stark is dead. And here's your reason: no bullshit included._

_When I was captured in Afghanistan for a missile demonstration, our convoy was attacked and as a result, shrapnel from an exploding device managed to work its way towards my heart. I've been using a miniature arc reactor similar to the one powering the Stark Industries factory to keep the shrapnel out of my heart. (No, I will not tell you how I managed to miniaturize the device. Forget it). Unfortunately, the same device that has kept me alive for so many months has also managed to kill me – the palladium in the arc reactor proved fatal. So if Stark Industries told you something else…they lied._

_Anyway, enough of that sob story…stay out of my house, don't talk to JARVIS, and tell Christine I said hi._

Pepper didn't even realize she had been holding her breath. The letter had been so concise, so straight to the point and so…unemotional. He had practically said, _I'm dying. Here's why._ As if it was an unimportant topic. Frantically, she opened another letter – this one addressed to Rhodes.

_Rhodey,_

_Don't blame yourself for taking the suit to the military. I was planning on doing it anyway. And you had reason to do it so I won't haunt you or anything._

_Thanks. For everything. For watching me when Pepper wasn't (don't tell her I said that. She'll get all jealous and whiny. Don't tell her I said that either). You've been a great friend. Really, you have, even though I rarely say it. Okay, I never say it. And you put up with a decent amount of my shit which is an adequate qualification for "best friend" to me—_

She stopped reading, and immediately put it back in the envelope, tears streaming down her face. These were letters that were supposed to be sent out after he died. He had prepared notes and last words and statements to everyone he knew or at least people who wanted to know what had happened. And she couldn't even begin to wrap her head around the fact that Tony had known he had been dying for months and had been preparing _everything_. Tony Stark who didn't know his own social security number and was known for his complete lack of responsibility had prepared everything for after his death. And she hadn't noticed.

Pepper looked down at the letter addressed to her. Everything in her wanted to open it. She wanted to know what he would tell her, what he wanted to tell her. In the end, after a few moments of internal conflict, she ignored her conscience and opened it anyway, hoping she wouldn't regret it. She frowned once she had, not sure if she should be relieved that she hadn't really done anything wrong or disappointed.

The page was blank.

Well, what the hell did that mean? A blank page? Was he not sure what to write? Or was it in a different envelope? That wasn't likely. So why was it blank? Did he never plan on writing anything to her? A million questions coursed through her mind but in the end, she slowly put all the letters back where she had found them. This wasn't her business anyway.

But why did everyone else get a letter except for her? Had he not started it yet? So why was there even a piece of paper inside to begin with?

The doorbell rang and Pepper jumped up, dragging herself to the present. She had been in Tony's room for over fifteen minutes and she tried to put everything back where she had found it in the exact order though she doubted Tony would even notice. As soon as she thought that, she wanted to slap herself. Yes, he would notice if something was different. Maybe the Tony before wouldn't have but the Tony now? The one in his workshop trying to save his own life? He'd notice. Besides, it didn't seem like Pepper knew Tony all that well anymore. What was wrong with her?

Again, the bell rang and Pepper ran out to answer it. It was Happy.

"Hey, Happy," she said as soon as she had answered, trying to hide her red eyes.

Happy could tell something was up, but he decided to mind his own business. "Everything from Tony's old office is in the car. Do you want me to go ahead and move it in?"

Pepper didn't answer at first. She just stared at the boxes in the car and especially at the long, rectangular cardboard pieces sticking out of the back, tied by a rope. All of this was supposed to be in Tony's office. _Tony's_. And now here it was at his doorstep to make room for her things as CEO of Stark Industries. If everything else wasn't proof enough that Tony was leaving everyone for good, she didn't know what was. _And you didn't notice_, she told herself harshly. _You. Didn't. Notice_.

"Ms. Potts?" Happy asked hesitantly.

"Yeah, you can move it all in," Pepper half whispered, still in a slight state of shock and again. Happy couldn't resist.

"Is everything alright?" he asked as he picked up one of the boxes to take inside.

Pepper tried to smile, but it probably looked more like she was about to hurl. "Everything's fine," she whispered as she led him inside. Each box was dropped just outside the door with the cardboard layouts that looked like pieces of a puzzle resting on the table.

* * *

_**Day 2, 4:00 PM**_

For hours, the entire house had been quiet. Even JARVIS hadn't said a word, a bad omen on its own. Pepper had tried to keep herself busy, playing P.A as opposed to CEO. She hadn't seen Tony all day and she hadn't gone into the workshop either, worried about what she would find. Would she find him working, but not getting anywhere? Or would she find him doing nothing, simply defeated?

She tried to stay involved with Stark Industries from Tony's home. Honestly, she did. But her heart wasn't in it and she didn't give a damn. She was on the phone with someone from the board when Tony finally made his way upstairs and away from the workshop. Without thinking or caring if what she was doing was rude, she hung up on the poor man on the phone and switched all of her attention towards Tony. He looked exhausted and worse, beaten.

"Tony…?" she called to him. He looked at her for a moment and smiled half heartedly. She knew that smile. It was _not_ good news.

"Did you…" She didn't need to finish the sentence. _Did you find anything?_

He shook his head, getting himself a cup of coffee. "No," he answered simply.

She nodded once. Should she say something? Tell him it was okay? That he would find something eventually? Or should she say he should forget it? To do what he wanted?

"Pepper…" he finally said. "Do you think…I should keep looking? Do you honestly think there's something out there?"

_Yes. No. I don't know, Tony! I just want there to be something! I don't know anything. I want to know, but I don't_. She didn't say any of that, though. Instead she said, "Do you?"

"I asked _you_."

"You asked me last time. I told you what I thought. Now I want to know what you think."

Tony sighed, rubbing the side of his face. "I…don't know if there is. I've looked, I've tried, I failed. And now I keep looking and I'm thinking…I'm chasing my own tail looking for something. Maybe there is something out there, but I don't know if I'll be the one to find it."

"Tony…" she said, not about to believe the words that were going to come out of her mouth. "You don't have to keep looking if you think there's nothing. If you don't want to--"

"I don't want to give up. And I don't want to stop looking if you think--"

"It doesn't matter what I think!" she almost yelled. "What do I know?"

_Everything_, he wanted to say. "Enough," he told her instead. "What you think matters."

"I don't want to be wrong, Tony. That's all. I want to _know_ but I don't. Neither of us can. So it all goes down to how do you want to spend the time? What do _you_ want to do? What I think doesn't matter. What you think does."

She had to bite her tongue as she said this. What she wanted to say was, _We will find it! There is something and we'll get it! And next week you'll laugh about how worried we were._ But she didn't _know_. She didn't want to give up. But it seemed like the logical option.

"Tony…"

She stopped when she saw his expression. He had stood up a little straighter, his eyes focused on something just in front of the door. "What is that?" he asked, pointing at the door.

Pepper turned to look what he was pointing at – all the things Happy had brought in from his office. "Happy stopped by and dropped off--"

"No, I know what it is but…" he stopped and made his way toward the rectangular cardboard cut outs. "This…" he laid the pieces side by side and now Pepper could see that it was a model of some sort of city. His eyes seemed to light up as he realized something. "Here, help me take some of this stuff to the shop," he asked and Pepper quickly bent down to take two of the pieces down right beside Tony.

She knew that look. He was thinking, his brain was working and firing at speeds Pepper would probably never comprehend. She said nothing and followed his instructions. He cleared off an entire table in his workshop by throwing everything on the floor and Pepper knew she was going to have to clean that up as soon as Tony was done doing whatever it was he was trying to do. Tony didn't clean up – he didn't understand the concept.

As soon as everything was set up, Tony was in his own world. "JARVIS, give me a manipulative form of this."

_Of course._

JARVIS started to scan the model and in a few moments, Tony held up a virtual version of the layout. Pepper quickly left the workshop, knowing that when Tony was thinking, it was best to leave him be. There was little Pepper could do to distract him but she wanted to give him enough time and space. He was on to something. She could feel it, even if she didn't understand it.

_Don't get too excited, Pepper_, she told herself, trying to calm down. _Don't get your hopes up…_ But that was like telling a bird not to fly. Pepper's hopes were already soaring and whirling around at a hundred miles an hour. There was no stopping them now.

_Please, let it be something…please, please, please…_

_

* * *

_

Fifteen minutes later, Pepper made her way back down the shop, deciding that she wouldn't enter. Just watch and see how things were going. She peeped through the sides of the window. Tony seemed to be surrounded by a virtual bubble comprised of miniature circles and the image reminded her of the droid phone commercials. The only difference was instead of a robot, Tony was in the middle of the virtual bubble, twirling around in his chair. Smiling. Laughing.

Pepper covered her mouth to stop herself from screaming as tears poured down her face. Tears of joy, relief…everything. The search was over. He had found it. And it was possible. There was a way out of this. _Oh, thank God, thank God, thank God…_

He would make it. He had found it.

**Yeah…so I changed the role Tony's dad played. Instead of the inspirational role, he made Tony feel like crap. I am evil. Hear me roar. Aah, whatever. Hope you liked the chapter! Please review and let me know what you think! You guys review so much and I really do appreciate it. I've kind of abandoned my House fic for this one because I feel that much more appreciated…lol. All my House readers must be **_**pissed**_**. I'm rambling. **

**Review please! :) And there is definitely more to come. This is sooooooooooo not it…**


	6. Chapter 6

**I just realized that I haven't put in a disclaimer for this story yet. So here it is: I don't own Ironman. But when you think about it, putting in a disclaimer is pointless because I wouldn't be on fanfiction if I owned Ironman. Isn't that the point of fanfiction anyway? That you recognize that you owe nothing but you're still allowed to play around with the characters? Oh, whatever, just read ;)**

**Chapter 6**

_**Day 3, 1:00 PM**_

Pepper Potts was on the phone with a member of the board, trying to keep everything and everyone in line during Tony Stark's mysterious disappearance. It had been four days since his infamous birthday party and no one had seen or heard from him. The company was getting worried and the press was getting antsy. And Pepper was just getting frustrated, especially at everyone's skepticism that she couldn't do the job as CEO _and _babysit her former boss at the same time.

"Mr. Stark is doing just fine, actually," Pepper said on the phone while rolling her eyes. "Well obviously, it's none of your business…the only reason it's _my_ business is because Mr. Stark chose to disclose that information _to me_…well, you'll find out when he sees fit to tell you…" And so on and so forth.

At the same time, she kept receiving calls from the press. Everyone from the New York Times to the National Enquirer had called her phone, Tony's cell or the landline, and each time, she chose to ignore the call. Of course, that never stopped them from trying.

"I assure you, everything is under complete control, Mr. Stark is doing just fine and-"

At that exact moment, part of the roof next to her collapsed on top of the grand piano and Pepper jumped up at the sound, screaming. Her eyes widened as she stared at the large concrete slab that had collapsed on top of the piano, breaking one of its legs. For a moment, all was silent. Then immediately afterwards, another one of the piano legs broke again and the entire piano collapsed onto the floor.

_Hello? Ms. Potts, what's going on?_

Pepper was still in shock as Tony came around through a side door to inspect the damage. He tilted his head and pursed his lips and after a moment, nodded his head and shrugged.

"Not bad," he decided.

He turned around, no doubt to destroy something else and found Pepper staring at the broken piano and then at him. Tony motioned at her phone while leaving the general area. "I think someone's on the line," he said. When Pepper said nothing Tony added exasperated, "We're back in hardware mode! Stuff gets broken."

Pepper covered the microphone. "That's what your workshop is for," she told him.

Tony shrugged. "I need more space," he said simply as he made his way back downstairs.

Pepper closed her eyes and exhaled deeply before putting the receiver back on her ear. "Hello? Yes, everything's fine, why?...oh something just fell …"

* * *

Tony had to get everything right the first time, if he intended to pull this stunt off.

By his calculations, the element he intended to create to replace the palladium in his chest would take three days to completely and successfully synthesize. That also meant he wouldn't have time to fix anything if it went wrong the first time, which, Tony realized, could potentially be a problem. Tony had no problem with the math, the planning, but he had the tendency to…destroy things in the process. It never really mattered to him _when_ he got things done (hence his punctuality problem) as long as they _got_ done and they were done well and perfectly. So what if he needed seventeen attempts? When he was finished, you'd be amazed. The iron man suit had taken him weeks to perfect after all.

So what were the chances that he'd _actually_ create the new element in three days? And do it all right the first time?

Tony threw down a collection of wires out the giant hole he had created. "Butterfingers…hold this," he directed and his robot came wheeling over.

"And if you let go, I swear I'm going to turn you into a coat rack."

Tony peered down the hole, not entirely eager to move the piano. As he thought about it, his focus shifted from the piano that was in the way, to Pepper who was barely visible in the hole, talking on the phone.

She could handle the job as CEO, he thought to himself. She knew what she was doing and she was responsible. So even if he didn't get the job done, even if he did mess up and he couldn't make the element in time, she'd be able to move on.

_Stop_, Tony warned himself quickly.

He wasn't supposed to think like that…he was setting himself up for failure by thinking like that. But if he expected failure, then he couldn't be disappointed.

_Yeah, but _she'll_ be_ _disappointed. And you can't do that to her._

Tony sighed, rubbing his eyes with his fingers and called out. "Pepper!"

"Can you give me a minute?" Pepper said to whoever she was talking to on the phone. Then she walked underneath the hole in the roof. "Are you insane?" she asked.

Tony ignored the outburst. "Listen, I'm about to smash through the piano, so you might want to continue your conversation in another room."

Pepper, made a face but nodded, complying. She took the phone and the few papers she had been holding.

"Thanks!" he yelled after her. Just before she left the room and closed the door behind her, she heard another loud smash as another hole was created where the piano used to be. She rolled her eyes as she tried to explain to the board member on the phone that everything was under control. The last thing she heard before she closed the door completely was "Butterfingers! I told you to hold it!" That sounded promising.

_Under complete control_, Pepper told herself.

* * *

_**An hour later**_

This wasn't working, Pepper finally realized as she threw aside the phone only for it to start ringing immediately. She couldn't do all this from Tony's home. She needed to go to Stark Industries and take care of some final business and while she was at it, hopefully convince the rest of the company that she could handle the pressure. The problem was, she didn't want to leave Tony at home even though the danger was over. He'd found his cure, all he had to do was create it. And for that, he didn't need her.

She stood up with a sense of finality, deciding that it was in not only the company's but Tony's best interest if she left to take care of business. She opened the door to search for him and was generally appalled and surprised at the sight in front of her. Half of the grand piano was shoved against the wall (she had no idea where the other half was) and over a dozen thick wires led from the top floor to the lowest level. She carefully made her way over the hole and peered down at the bottom.

"Tony?" she called out as she looked around.

She heard some shuffling beyond her sight and then Tony appeared underneath the opening. "Yeah?"

This was ridiculous, she thought to herself. But she knew it was probably necessary. She also knew whatever he was doing could probably be done with a lot less destruction but Tony didn't believe in minimizing damage. "I need to go to the office."

"Okay?" he said, not entirely sure why this concerned him.

"Do you need anything?" she asked.

"You don't work for me anymore, remember?" he said. Then he jumped a little and frowned. "Dummy…let go…"

Pepper frowned a little, realizing what he said was true (regarding work, not Dummy). He was right…she didn't work for him. So why was she still in that mindset?

"Force of habit," she told him. "Do you want anything?"

Tony kicked something and tried to keep himself from being entangled in all the wires. "I'm fine, Pepper. Dummy! That's not where I told you to put it!" And with that last statement, Tony left the opening to fix the mess his own robots had made.

Pepper smiled a little as she left him to do his work. As she left to go to the office, she realized that it had been a while since she had seen him working on some new project, besides fixing his ironman suits. It was nice to see him back to work and not as defeated. The Tony Stark she knew was still in there.

* * *

By the time she had finally reached her new office, she had already talked to over a dozen people, all wondering where she had been for the last few days and where Tony had disappeared off to. By the time, she had escaped into her own portion of the building, she was considering turning around and marching back out.

"Took you a while to get here," a familiar voice said on the other side of the room causing Pepper to jump up. She sighed, steadying herself and rolled her eyes as she walked to the other side of the desk.

"What the hell are you doing here, Rhodes?" she asked, honestly curious. He was never down here unless Tony was.

"Where's Tony?" he asked as she approached.

"At home," she told him simply, deciding she didn't have to be _completely_ evasive.

"I need to talk to him," he said.

"No, you can_not_."

"You just told me he was at home-"

"He's working," she said simply, starting up her computer.

"You're not mad at me are you?" he said, surprised.

"Why would I be mad?"

"Because I took his suit and sent it off to the military? Look, I know he's probably mad at me but-"

"No, he's not," she interrupted, remembering the letters she had found yesterday. "He's not mad. _I'm_ not angry either."

"So why can't I see him?"

"Because he's working!" she said, exasperated. She didn't have a problem with Rhodey seeing Tony, but she wasn't sure if Tony was ready to go ahead and explain everything that had happened in the last three days. "Tony's fine…I didn't kill him, but can you just take the hint and give him some space?"

Rhodey was taken aback by her harshness. This was Pepper, for crying out loud. And for her to get on the defensive so suddenly…there had to be something going on. Something was bugging her and she didn't want to tell.

"What's going on?" he asked instead.

"Nothing is wrong, everything's fine-"

"Don't lie to me, Pepper," he said, not liking the way her tone was changing. Something was going on…and it wasn't good news. He could feel it.

Pepper said nothing for a while, contemplating. Finally, she looked up and said, "You know, he trusts you. And he couldn't care any less about you taking the suit."

"What…?" Where was this coming from? He just wanted to know what she was hiding.

"I'll call you later, Rhodey. I'll tell you what's going on after I talk to him. But you need to keep it quiet. For now, just play along and pretend you don't know what's going on."

"I _don't _know what's going on."

"Trust me, Rhodey," she said. "I'll let you know soon. But right now…everything's fine."

"For now? What was going on before?"

Before Pepper could say anything, a member of the board barged into her office. Pepper sighed and then looked at Rhodey, "Later," was all she told him before the person who had just barged in babbled away about the stocks and the mob of reporters waiting outside the building.

Rhodey took the hint and left her to do her business. He wasn't going to go to Tony's now. No, he'd wait another twenty four hours or so and give Pepper some time to finally tell her the truth. When that didn't happen, he was getting his answers one way or another.

* * *

_Sir, Ms. Potts is calling_.

Tony was trying to saw something in half so now probably wasn't the best time to answer the phone. Still, he dropped what he was doing and started working on something less distracting and not as loud. "Yeah, send her through."

"Tony, it's me," Pepper called out.

"Why do we people answer the phone like that?" Tony answered. "Either I know who you are so it's useless to tell me 'it's me' or I don't know who you are, in which case it's still useless."

"Rhodey's here," she said, ignoring him.

Tony stopped what he was doing. "What does "here" mean? Here, as in at home? Or "here" as in with you?"

"Neither for now. But he wants to talk to you."

"Where is he?"

"I made him go away. I told him I'd talk to you first."

"I thought you didn't like it when I kept secrets," Tony said, resuming his work.

"I don't but I thought it would be best if I checked with you-"

"I'll call him later," Tony said, with almost no intention of doing just that. He didn't care if Rhodey knew at this point, but he was just so busy he knew he was going to forget anyway.

"Alright…and everyone's wondering where you are. I've got the press hanging on every word I say and the entire company thinks you're on the world's longest hangover."

"World's longest hangover…" Tony thought aloud. "That's not a very good alibi is it?"

"Seriously, Tony-".

"I am being serious. How long _is_ the world's longest hangover?"

"I need something to tell everyone. And a hangover isn't the best idea you've come up with."

"Vacation," Tony decided.

"You were just on a vacation."

"Yeah, and look at how well that turned out," he said, thinking about his "vacation" in Monaco that Whiplash had conveniently ruined. So much for that.

Pepper didn't say anything at first, understanding where he was coming from. Then she said, "Vacation in Spain?"

"Sounds like a plan," Tony said before telling JARVIS to hang up. He then shifted his entire attention on the work ahead of him.

Well, almost all of his attention. Part of his mind couldn't help but drift into the land of doubt. What if he didn't finish in time? What if he messed up and didn't have time to start over? What if the solution he had created to prolong his life was going to screw him over and kill him a day before or even a few hours before?

And worst of all, how would Pepper deal?

She would have to deal, there was nothing he could do about it if this all failed. He had to be realistic. There was a large chance that this was going to all work out just fine but "large chance" wasn't a "one hundred percent chance". There was still room for error and mistakes, and he needed to accommodate.

And in this case, accommodate meant to set things right. Take care of last minute business. His will was in place, Pepper was CEO of Stark Industries and all of his goodbye letters had been written.

All apart from one.

He bit his lower lip, trying to focus on the task ahead and not the possibility of failure. He needed to write her letter but he had refused to do it. He was worried that if he wrote and completed it, it would make everything else permanent, even though that was completely illogical. But to him, writing his last letter to Pepper was proof that there was nothing left, and even though he was worried and doubt had clouded his mind, he wasn't willing to accept that it was over yet. Writing that last letter was the ultimate sign of defeat.

He shook his head, thinking to himself. No. He wasn't going to write her letter. He was going to work, and he was going to finish this and get it right the first time. And if it didn't work…_then_ he'd write that last letter. Pepper's note would be the threshold between hope and despair; success and failure. When he knew for certain, when he knew that there was no point in trying, when he was one hundred percent certain that it was all over once and for all – then he'd write her letter.

He had to tell himself that he wasn't going to do that. He was _not_ going to write a goodbye letter to Pepper. The idea was too painful and just thinking about it felt like he was being stabbed through the chest. He wouldn't write that letter. He wasn't going to say goodbye forever. He had to not only tell himself that, but he also had to _believe_ it.

And for now, that would keep him pushing forward.

**I've decided that for simplicity reasons, Whiplash isn't going to be in this fic (for now. I may change my mind). Sorry, folks **

**A generally blah chapter. Again, sorry. But I guess you can't always have super exciting/angsty chapters all the way through…because then it gets boring and old. (After all…it's only day 3. I still have time for angst, lol). Don't worry…I promise it'll get better. Don't you trust me? . *hypnotism* haha, review please! XD thank you my loves!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Hey, guys! Enjoy the next installment! :)**

**Chapter 7**

_**Day 4, 2:00 PM**_

Blood toxicity: 64%

Tony exhaled loudly as he tossed the machine in the corner and sucked the blood from his thumb. He tried to shrug it off – blood toxicity of 64%. _That's expected_, he told himself. It had been four days since he had been administered the dosage. A blood toxicity of 64% was pretty low for the damage that was to come. He lifted up his shirt and inspected the growing spider veins in the bathroom mirror and bit his lower lip. In less than twenty four hours, his condition had gone from great to questionable. The symptoms were coming back and at full force. _It's expected_, he thought again. There was no need to freak out. He had his cure, he was almost done building the contraption meant to synthesize the element, so why did he have the horrible feeling that something might go wrong?

"Tony!" Pepper called out from outside, searching for him. Immediately, he switched on the tap water and ran some hot water on his face. As if that was going to make him look any less stressed out.

"Tony?" she called out again, growing increasingly worried and frustrated.

He sighed, opening the door. He understood that she was worried and scared – he got it. But he still wanted her to relax just a little. He wasn't dead yet. _Right, because that's going to make her relax._

His plan was to slip back into his office without her seeing him, but he wasn't granted that much luck. She found him moments after he had left his room.

"Have you called-" she started but she lost her words as soon as he turned around to face her, and he knew exactly why. The dark circles around his eyes, the distant look within them – he was exhausted.

"Did you sleep at all last night?" she asked. She wanted to reach up and take his face in her hands, and it took almost everything in her to hold back.

_No. I didn't sleep at all last night because I was paranoid I'd die in my sleep. So I set an alarm to go off every thirty minutes._ Not only that, but the palladium poisoning was catching up to him big time. For days its damage had been repressed but the dam had finally broken – the influx of metal into his bloodstream was increasing at a dangerous rate. It was only two in the afternoon and he was already tired.

"I'm fine," Tony told her instead. A lie. He was lying to her again. He should take it back, tell her the truth. _She doesn't need to know the truth, it doesn't matter right now. _That's what you said before and look at where it got you. _I'll tell her later…when it gets really important. Besides, she'll catch on._ And that's how you want her to find out? You want her to 'catch on' or do you want to just tell her? _Neither_. "I'm fine," he repeated, as if to convince himself. "What were you going to ask?"

She shook her head slightly. "Nothing…it doesn't matter. Later, okay? Do you need anything? Are you hungry?"

He laughed a little. "I told you – you don't work for me anymore, remember?"

She doesn't laugh back. Instead, she looked scared and worried and she shrugged slightly. "I just…I want to make sure you're fine….that's it…"

Pepper wanted normalcy, that's what she was really after. "Pepper, go home and get some sleep."

She rolled her eyes. "Will that be all, Mr. Stark?" she asked sarcastically.

"That'll be all Ms. Potts."

* * *

_**5:00 PM**_

Tony was on his back underneath part of his new creation, fixing a loose segment when the doors to the workshop opened.

"Pepper, is that you?" he said from underneath, his attention focused on his work and not able to see her. "Can you pass me the screwdriver? It's on my desk-"

A few moments later, the screwdriver appeared in front of him and he grappled for it, still focusing on holding his end of the contraption up. "Thank you-"

"No problem," said a voice much deeper than Pepper's. Caught by surprise, Tony tried to peer around to see who it was. "Oh. Hi, Rhodey."

"What the hell is this?" Rhodey asked, looking around. Not that Tony could see what he was doing.

"Uh…" Tony started, not entirely sure where to start. "What did Pepper tell you?"

"About this thing you're building? Nothing," he said, looking around.

_Oh, well, in that case_. "I'm trying to create a new element and this device should help me synthesize it."

Of course, Tony knew that a follow up question was bound to follow, so he waited for Rhodey to digest the information and then ask the inevitable. "What?"

Tony sighed, still underneath the machine. "You wouldn't happen to remember my little palladium issue, would you?" he asked, knowing quite well the problems with his arc reactor were everything except "little".

Rhodey frowned. "The arc reactor…the palladium cartridges you had to keep changing…?"

"Yeah, that."

"What about it?" he asked, knowing that whatever he was about to hear was not going to be good news.

"It's…not working very well. Actually, it's fine – the arc reactor is fine, it's the palladium that's killing me-"

"It's _killing_ you?"

Tony winced, still trying to hold up the metal tunnels. Oops. He wasn't supposed to drop the "it's killing me" bomb yet. "Uh…yeah, actually it is. So I'm trying to replace the palladium."

"You're _just_ starting to replace it? Why didn't you replace it before?"

Alright. _Now_, Tony was getting angry. What, did everyone think he was _that_ self destructive? That he would know that he was dying but still do nothing about it? "Actually, I've tried over a hundred different elements and combination of elements to replace it but nothing works – and I've been trying for three and a half months. So the only reason I couldn't just replace it before was because I had nothing to replace it _with_!"

When he stopped speaking, Tony realized that in his frustration, he had started yelling. He sighed, trying to calm himself down before continuing. "That's not the point," he said. "The point is, my time's up – as of four days ago. That's when my blood toxicity tanked. I invented this solution that would keep me alive for a week if that ever happened – and that's what's keeping me alive right now. And it will for the next three days."

It was a lot of information to absorb in one sitting. And it was even harder to have to tell his best friend. Rhodey didn't say anything at first. He just watched him work from where he was standing, still unable to believe what he had just heard.

"What?" Tony asked, hating the silence, even though he knew he should probably give him a moment to digest.

"What do you mean 'what'?" Rhodey asked. "What am I supposed to say to all this? Right now I'm pissed you didn't say anything until now! Why would you keep a secret like that?"

"There's nothing you could have done even if I had told you before. All you would've known is that I'm dying and no one wants to know that."

"No one wants it to be _true_, but people need to know the truth! You didn't want anyone to know? Knowing would have given us all time to-"

"To what?" Tony asked, trying to hurry up and put the machine in place so he could get out from underneath it. "Time to do what? Say goodbye? I didn't want to hear it, Rhodey! I didn't want anyone to start freaking out, I didn't want anyone to worry about saying the right things around me, to treat me any differently-" He hit the machine to jam the last piece in place and slid the screwdriver elsewhere before getting out from underneath it. "I didn't want anyone to know because I didn't want to deal with it."

He wiped the dirt on his hands on a rag beside him and finally looked up at Rhodey. He didn't seem angry, or frustrated or even worried…he looked shocked and surprised. _God_, Tony thought to himself. _Do I look that tired_? Tony sighed rubbing his eyes. "Don't look at me like that, Rhodey."

"When was the last time you had some sleep-?"

"It's nothing, it's not a big deal – it's the palladium, my blood toxicity levels are going through the roof. The solution's wearing off there's nothing I can do about it."

Rhodey sighed, taking a seat somewhere. "I can't believe you didn't say anything."

Tony winced again. This was the one thing he seemed to truly regret – he wished he could go back and tell everyone. Now…everyone he knew felt betrayed, and all he had meant to do was make it easier on everyone, himself included. "Okay, I know, I should've said something-"

"So was that the point of Monaco?" Rhodey asked suddenly. "Deciding to suddenly drive your racecar? Last minute wish?"

Tony thought about it for a moment, not sure how to respond. "I…wanted to drive it, and I never had and I thought if I didn't try it now I'd never get the chance to-"

"And your birthday…" Rhodey thought aloud, guilt weighing him down.

"Hey, look, don't beat yourself up; it's not your fault I decided to break drinking records."

"I took it to the military-"

"But really…if you think about it, it's great that you did, because that was my plan anyway, to send it off – so you really helped me-"

"You were planning to send off the suit to the military?" Rhodey asked, shocked. Again.

Tony felt like kicking himself. He really needed to watch his mouth. Ha. Like that would ever happen. "Yes…" he said slowly. "Yes, it was my plan to send off the suit to the military eventually because they wanted it and if I'm not around it's not going to do me much good so-"

"You've been planning everything for your death this entire time." The statement was a mix between a realization and a question.

"Well, not really, but…yeah," Tony finally decided. "Well…except for the party that was a last minute addition. But, come on, give me a break, it's my last birthday-"

"_It's_?" Rhodey questioned.

"Alright, Grammar Queen, it _was_ my last birthday-"

"It was?"

"See, now you're not making any sense," Tony said, pointing at him.

"No, _you're_ not making sense. It wasn't your last birthday period. You're making this…thing," Rhodey waved at the giant contraption that wormed its way around the entire room. "This thing is supposed to help you make another element to use, right? So you're going to be fine?"

Tony didn't say anything. He tossed the rag he was holding aside and Rhodey could tell there was something else. Something wrong – something Tony hadn't told anyone yet.

"You don't think this is going to work…do you?"

Tony rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm not sure. It should work, my math is right, the procedure should work but…I don't know, I just have this feeling that something's going to go wrong."

"So if you think this is going to fail why are you working on it?"

_Because I can't let her down. I have to at least try_."I…I have to try it."

Rhodey shook his head. "No…no, that's not it. Or at least that's not the only reason."

Tony's lip twitched slightly. "She wants me to try…" he admitted. "She thinks it's going to work."

He didn't have to say who "she" was; Rhodey could catch on. But he still couldn't help but remain confused. "That…doesn't make sense, you don't think it's going to work but Pepper does? So who's right?"

"I don't know who's right…it's complicated and I'm not sure-"

"Since when are you not sure?"

"I don't…_know_…" Tony tried to explain. "I can't know if this is going to work or not. It should work, everything adds up but I don't know if I'm going to screw this up. You don't get it, if I screw this over I don't have time to fix this. I've only got three days left."

Rhodey didn't say anything at first, trying to understand where he was coming from. He understood the worry, the doubt, but there was still a problem. "You need to tell her."

"No, I don't," Tony said standing up to work on something else.

"Yes, you do. You think it's better for her to think that everything's going to work out and if it doesn't for her to have to deal with that? Tell her you're going to try this but let her know you're not sure. Tell her the _truth_."

"I don't know anything-"

"Which is exactly why you should tell her your doubts. You've been lying to everyone since, no one knew about any of this-"

"Hey!" Tony said, pointing a finger at him warningly. "That's not fair."

"The least you could do is tell her the truth now. You owe her that. You owe us all that."

"You're not making this easy on me, I _know_ I owe her. She's been putting up with my shit for the last couple weeks, she gave me the solution that gave me a week to live which definitely wasn't her job, alright? I _know_ all that but damn it, you're not helping me out here."

"What, you want me to be your yes man? I'm telling you what I think is right!"

"And I'm telling you I can't do it!" Tony yelled back. The two stared at each other, Rhodey unable to believe Tony's adamant stubbornness and Tony unable to believe Rhodey actually thought he'd be able to tell Pepper that despite everything he was trying, it might all be in vain. Tony sighed. "I'll…tell her. Later. When I know for sure if this is going to work."

"It's going to be too late, then." Rhodey told him. Tony said nothing and Rhodey decided to drop the subject, realizing that he wasn't going to get anywhere. "Do you need help with anything?"

Tony shook his head. "I've got it."

"Why do you always do that? You don't have to do everything by yourself. It's okay to need help."

"I'm fine, Rhodes," Tony said, chugging a glass of chlorophyll.

"I'll stop by later, tonight," Rhodey told him, getting ready to leave.

"Sure, I'll see you then."

"Alright…and Tony?"

"Yeah?"

He stopped before exiting the room once and for all. "Don't hide things from me again."

Tony smiled at that one. "Sure thing, Platypus," he answered as he left.

Rhodey didn't understand why Tony really wanted to keep going. Why he was scared to quit. It wasn't because Tony didn't want to her hurt her feelings; but because she was the only one giving him the hope he needed to push forward.

If Pepper ever gave up on him, then he would know that the battle was truly over.

* * *

Pepper was about to walk into Tony's workshop but instead, she found Tony and Rhodey talking, or perhaps more accurately, arguing. She didn't enter, but tried to listen to what they were saying. This is what she heard:

_You don't think this is going to work do you?_ Rhodey. That was definitely Rhodey.

_I'm not sure…I have to try it…She wants me to try…She thinks it's going to work._

_That doesn't make sense..._

_It should work, everything adds up but I don't know if I'm going to screw this up…if I screw this over I don't have time to fix this. I've only got three days left._

_You need to tell her…you think it's better for her to think that everything's going to work and if it doesn't for her to deal with that? The least you could do is tell her the truth. You owe her that._

_I know I owe her!...I know all that but damn it, you're not helping me out here._

_I'm telling you what I think is right!_

_And I'm telling you I can't do it!_

Pepper turned around and went back up the stairs quickly, her head and heart pounding. So was Tony doomed to fail? Was this plan of his not going to work anyway? So why was he doing it? For her? To make her feel better? No, he couldn't do that. She didn't know what she would do if the only reason he was trying was to make her feel better; to give her a few days of hope. She had to tell him it was okay, that if he wanted to quit it was okay. This was _his_ week and because she was being selfish, she had unknowingly manipulated him into wasting his time. She had to fix this so that he could make use of the time he had left.

But she didn't want to give up on him. She didn't want to say goodbye. She tried to hold the tears inside but it was impossible. She knew she needed to stop this – she couldn't do this to him. She had to tell him that it was okay, because it seemed the only reason he was going on was because of her. And that wasn't right.

She had to tell him it was alright to give up.

* * *

_**An hour later**_

It had taken Pepper all she had within her to make her way down to the workshop. In her mind, she had formulated what she would say, how she would say it, but every conversation she envisioned in her head didn't seem to go the way she intended. She had finally decided to just go down there and tell him the truth.

The truth. It seemed to be the hardest thing to share now, especially in the last week. And she hated that.

Tony was chugging a glass of green liquid – the chlorophyll. He was back on the chlorophyll. Pepper kept her eyes slightly downcast, allowing them to travel across the entire room. But she kept her eyes away from Tony. She couldn't look at him. If she did she knew she'd break down. All she would think was, "This is it. He's going to die. He's going to leave me forever."

"Did you finally get some sleep like I told you?" he asked playfully, typing something on one of his computers. The bright blue glow of the arc reactor was visible through his shirt and Pepper felt like screaming. It was the most evil and mocking invention she'd ever seen. The arc reactor – a machine that had saved him and killed him. She hated it for doing both.

"Tony…" she started, now wishing she had thought of a way to start at least. "Do you…do you really think this is going to work?"

He stopped what he was doing and looked up and his eyes darkened. In a split second, he had gone from confident to vulnerable and frightened, but Pepper hadn't caught it. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"This…what you're making…" she tried to explain. "Will it work?"

"It would be relatively useless otherwise. Why?" He tried to keep the tone light but the fear was there. It was visible, as clear as spring water. Did she think this wasn't going to work? Was it over then?

"I…I was thinking that…that if you think this isn't going to work…or if you think it's too hard…or impossible…that it's okay. You don't have to keep going…" She could feel the tears threatening to escape and she looked away, hoping he wouldn't notice. She didn't want to make him feel guilty.

Tony said nothing, but his heart had fallen thirty stories. So it was over. No, she couldn't give up on him like that. Not now. Oh, God, please not now. "I…I think," Tony hesitated. "I might…or that I could-"

"It's fine if you don't want to, Tony. You don't have to do it because of me; you don't have to do anything because of me. I want you to do what _you_ want for the days you have left…" It was too late. The tears were falling on their own accord.

"Is that what _you_ think?" Tony asked. "That this isn't going to work?"

"I don't know-"

She didn't know, Tony thought to himself. The fear and doubt outweighed the positivity. She was more certain that this was going to fail. She was giving up on him. "You…want me to stop?"

"If you want to…I feel like I'm forcing you to do this and it makes me feel terrible-"

"No, you're not forcing me to do anything, I want to-"

"You're just saying that, Tony, I don't-"

"Stop," he said, standing up and walking up to her. "Please. Tell me the truth. Do you really think this?" _Please don't give up on me, Pepper. I need you now._

She sniffed and hugged herself before continuing, still unable to meet his eyes. "You don't tell me the truth so why should I tell you?"

He felt like his heart had been stabbed through his chest. He couldn't breathe, he could hardly think. The only thing running in his mind was that he had lost her. This is what keeping secrets did – no one trusted him anymore. Not even Pepper. "I'm sorry…I told you that. I know I shouldn't have kept all of this a secret, but I'm sorry…I should have told you I was dying but-"

She shook her head. "No, not that. But…today, I heard you and Rhodey talking."

His breath caught in his throat. How much had she heard? How had she taken it? Did she hear all of the conversation or just parts of it? What did she think? Did she hate him?

"I heard you and Rhodey talking and I felt bad because I had forced you to try this when you weren't sure…you don't even believe it's going to work but you're doing it anyway because of me, and I can't handle that.."

"Pepper…"

"How am I supposed to live with myself knowing that I forced you to run around in circles for a week because I was being selfish?"

"Hold up, slow down," he said, relieved. _This_ he could handle. "I don't know if this is going to work, I'm not going to lie to you. It should, but things can go wrong and I won't have time to fix it if they do. That's all. You should know that. But that doesn't mean I'm going to just quit."

"But that's what you want to do, isn't it?" she said, not convinced. "You're only trying because you think you owe me…but you don't owe me anything! That's what Fury said. He said you'd try if I made you feel guilty-"

"That is the last reason I'm doing this. Forget Fury, he doesn't matter, alright? I'm doing this because I think this can happen and _you_ think this can happen."

"So it's still partly my fault…I shouldn't be-"

"Just by believing that this is going to work you're helping me out," he admitted. "Okay? I can't do this if I'm the only one who thinks this will work. But if you think this will work too then I know I've got a chance. I think this can work. Do _you_?"

Pepper didn't look at him for a while, trying to formulate an answer. Finally she looked him in the eye and said, "Yes, Tony. I think you can do it. But I'm scared that-"

"That's it," Tony interrupted, placing a finger on her lips, cutting her off completely. He didn't need to know more. "That's all I need to know. Alright?" He was pushing boundaries, being this close, but he figured he could make an exception. For now.

Pepper nodded her head slowly as he took back his finger. He sighed. "You really, really need to get some sleep and stop listening in on my conversations, okay?"

She smiled. "I don't ever get to know anything if I don't listen in."

He shrugged. "Point taken. And to put your mind at ease…I should be done by tomorrow night." He saw her eyes light up and immediately afterwards, he felt terrible. He wasn't lying about being finished with the element by the next day, but what if something went wrong and he had to push back the date? He still had time but-

_Stop it, damn it. You need to stop worrying that something is going to mess up._

Or maybe…it wasn't that he was scared about messing up, but scared of disappointing her.

"Oh, God," Pepper said, burying her face in her hands. "I just want all this to be over." She rubbed the side of her face for a moment before looking back up at him.

"Go. Sleep. _Now_," Tony demanded, not taking no for an answer. She rolled her eyes but left the workshop, considerably more at ease than she had been when she had first entered.

_Damn it, Tony…you better finish this. And do finish it right._

**Thanks for reading and review on your way out please! Thanks! :)**


	8. Chapter 8

**Seven chapters and a grand total of 144 reviews. I believe thanks are in order :) I'd give you all real cookies but unfortunately all I have in my pockets are cyber cookies, so those are just going to have to work :) Thanks sooooo much! Reviews mean so much to me! Enjoy the next chapter!**

**Chapter 8**

_**Day 5, 2:00 PM**_

Blood toxicity: 76%

Honestly, Tony didn't know why he kept checking it. He knew it was only going to get worse until his time was up, so what was the point in monitoring how bad things got and how fast? Besides, he didn't need the machine to tell him that the poisoning was getting its job done. He looked like he hadn't slept in weeks; the silver spider veins were now widespread, surrounding half the area of his chest. He was taking twice the amount of chlorophyll he had been taking the day before and he changed the palladium cartridges regularly. He was right back where he was last week. And all in five days.

His exhaustion was in part due to the fact that he hadn't slept until four in the morning the night before, trying to finish up his latest creation. And if that wasn't bad, he had woken up four hours later to keep working. His imminent death was keeping him on edge, but if he was going to be so tired all day there wasn't much he could do anyway. The one thing that was keeping him on his toes and working towards his goal was that in approximately five hours, he should be finished.

* * *

Pepper was, again, on the phone, trying to keep everyone and everything in order although she wasn't physically at the company headquarters. She didn't care. Today, nothing in hell could make her leave the mansion. She couldn't just leave now, knowing that Tony was just hours away from his final breakthrough. And she was going to be here when that happened – to hell with Stark Industries. And the last thing she wanted to do was interrupt him when he was so close to the end of all this madness.

She knew she shouldn't get her hopes up too high. If she hadn't taken anything out of Tony's confession the day before then she should have at least gotten this – Tony wasn't one hundred percent sure this would work on schedule. He might need to push back the date, do some last minute adjustments. Or it might not even work at all…

Then what?

She didn't want to think about that. Instead, she told herself that worst come to worst, he'd move the date back slightly. This was going to work. It had to work. Because if it didn't, she wasn't sure how she'd make it after he was gone.

* * *

_**7:00 PM**_

Rhodey arrived to see how everything was going and Pepper let him in.

"Hi, Rhodey," she answered.

"Hey," he said, noticing that she didn't look as stressed out. In fact, she almost looked _relieved_, and for that he was grateful. It meant things were looking up. Either that or Tony was lying to her again but he preferred to believe the former was true. "How's Tony?"

"He's downstairs…he actually should be finished in half an hour or so."

Ah, Rhodey thought to himself. That's why she looked relieved. So this was almost over. The nightmare was that much closer to ending. She led him downstairs where Tony was welding a part of the giant machine together. Yet, despite the noise already caused by him working, his music was still turned up, blaring. Without a second thought, Pepper turned it down.

"Put my music back up," he yelled over the noise, still welding.

"How can you hear it?" she yelled back. When he didn't say anything, Pepper rolled her eyes. "Yeah, you can hear your music but you can't hear me."

As soon as he was finished, Tony turned off his machine, throwing the mask he was wearing aside. "Actually I did hear you… Rhodey, stop looking at me like that."

Rhodey couldn't help it – Tony looked like he had aged overnight. _I'm going to get a kick out of making fun of him about this once he makes his new chest piece._

"Stop gawking and make yourself useful," Tony demanded. "Come here…hold this up…"

Pepper was just glad that he was back to his regular self. He wasn't as down and depressed as he had been throughout the entire week. The Tony she knew was coming out of the shadows again; proof once again that this period of chaos and worry was almost over.

"Are you almost finished? What do you have left?" Pepper asked, hoping she didn't sound too eager or desperate.

"Well, if Butterfingers here can hold this for a minute…I'm talking about you Rhodey, not the robot, stop glaring at it…"

Pepper laughed, smiling to herself. "Do you need me to do anything?"

"Actually, if you can get that funny looking shield on my desk – yeah, that one…" he motioned towards his desk and Pepper brought the item he was referring to. Tony glanced at his friend who looked like he was having a hard time holding up his part of the machine. He couldn't help but laugh. "Having trouble, Platypus…oh, come on it's not that heavy."

"It's not heavy, it's just not balanced…" Rhodey told him, trying to keep it from toppling to the floor.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, give me this and hold that," Tony instructed, nodding at the shield as he took the piece from Rhodey. "Alright, now put it under…" Rhodey slipped the shield underneath the machine, keeping it upright and balanced.

"Let's get this show on the road!" Tony announced, twisting something into place. "JARVIS, make sure everything's heated up accordingly." He looked at Rhodey and Pepper, his hands clasped together. "Who wants to watch me blow something up?"

* * *

Ten minutes later, and everything was finally in place. Rhodey and Pepper remained in the workshop mostly due to their own anxiety. Tony tried to ignore them, knowing that if he paid them any attention, his own nervousness would undoubtedly increase as well.

"And…transferring power to wheel," Tony said as the lights dimmed. Every ounce of power in the room was necessary to fuel the procedure about to take place. Lights could be abandoned.

"Pepper, you might want to stand behind the machine and not in front of it…I'd hate to cut you in half…"

As Pepper moved aside, Tony mentally checked off everything on his list. So far, so good.

"Fire it up," Tony said as a hot beam of energy shot out of the opening of the machine and into the wall on the opposite end of the room. He tried to focus the beam on his intended target, still meters away from its current location, but the wheel was stuck. _Perfect_, he thought to himself as he quickly abandoned the wheel. Instead, he attached a simple lever to it and started to pull it toward him, rotating the wheel and ultimately, moving the beam toward his intended goal – the center of his new triangular shaped element. In essence, he was aiming for a space with an area of four centimeters.

Unfortunately, what Tony _didn't_ know was that a stray, unlit spark, still remained in the area of the machine he had previously welded together. Tony didn't catch it, JARVIS didn't catch it – there was no way any person or machine could have sensed its presence. However – this stray spark was full of potential – a ticking time bomb, if you will. Once a certain amount of energy was placed into it, the bomb would blow.

The problem was that Tony didn't know that this ticking bomb was still resting on the machine. Tony continued to pull the lever and as he did so, the beam slowly moved, making its way towards the target, destroying everything in its path. _Pepper's probably adding up how much she's going to have to pull out of my account to fix this_, he thought to himself, still pulling.

"Uh…Tony…" Pepper called out.

He knew exactly what she was talking about. The beam was about to approach a cabinet labeled "highly flammable". _So much for that_, he thought as he sawed it in half with the beam. "Whoops," he said aloud, trying to remember what exactly he kept inside the cabinet that had been "highly flammable".

"Tony!" Pepper yelled out again, but he could tell that whatever she was whining about this time was much more serious. He dared a few moments to glance in her direction and immediately saw the problem. A part of the tunnel that formed the machine was heating up and fast. Already, it looked as if it was glowing – the metal burning light orange.

"Oh, boy…" Tony said out loud but he continued to move the lever. He couldn't abandon it now. If he switched off the machine, he wouldn't be able to turn it back on – this was a onetime shot. No redo's.

And at that exact moment, the tunnel popped.

Well, not really – but it _sounded_ like that particular piece of the tunnel had popped. Something inside had snapped due to the heat.

"Pepper! Back off!" he demanded and she quickly complied. The next sound wasn't going to be nearly as conservative as a little pop.

Moments later, that section of the tunnel's color had changed from light orange to fiery red. In an instant, the section caught on flames and the sound was almost deafening – a miniature explosion. Pepper screamed as the fire escaped the tunnel and out into the open.

"Rhodey!" Tony called out but he was already on it, trying to remember where Tony kept the fire extinguisher. _He can take care of it_, Tony thought to himself as he pulled the lever a little harder. _Oh, come on…_

Rhodey and Pepper were doing their best to take out the fire but the rest of the machine was already overheating. Tony was already starting to feel the heat seep into the lever he was holding but he kept going anyway. He was so close to the target – if everything just held on for a little longer then this would all be behind him. He couldn't put in this much work only for it to fail merely inches from his goal.

_Come on, come on, come on…_ he pleaded, running out of words to say. This had to work. Somewhere in his peripheral vision, Rhodey had found his fire extinguisher and was putting out the fire. Still, he focused all his attention on the task ahead. _So close, so close…keep going…_

And all at once, the lights switched off completely and the beam coming from the machine disappeared – six inches from the center. Tony knew what was coming next thanks to the overheating. He closed his eyes, grimacing.

_Oh, crap_.

The explosion sent him flying to the other side of the room and set the other half of the giant machine on fire as well. Tony crashed into his desk, sending everything on top flying. Glass shattered beside him, cutting his arm and he tried to sit up to inspect the damage.

He had invested four days into this – and now he watched as fire consumed all of his work. He didn't stand up; he didn't even bother to help take out the fire. What was the point? So what if the fire spread and burned down the entire workshop – it wasn't like he was going to be there to use it in four days. He didn't have four days. The time he thought he had, the hope that he once possessed had been completely devoured along with his machine.

Tony's face felt warm and for a moment, he wasn't entirely sure why. _Oh…the fire…_

Wait, the fire? How had it spread so far so quickly?

"Tony!" he heard Rhodey yell and finally Tony was brought back into the present. The fire was feet away from him and yet, Tony hadn't even moved. Rhodey sounded like he was five miles away and even though he saw the fire, felt the heat, and heard his name, he didn't move. At least if he was taken now by the fire, the worry would finally be over and disappointment wouldn't be a factor. Better now then later. The fire could take him, it was easier this way.

"Tony!" Pepper screamed. Suddenly, the fire that was getting closer to him was extinguished in a long stream of white clouds. Tony couldn't help but be disappointed that his chance of escape had disappeared along with everything else.

No, he couldn't be disappointed. Did he really want to leave so abruptly? To die just like that? Without really saying goodbye. _You're being a coward_, _Tony. You're being a coward._

"Why didn't you move?" Rhodey screamed, grabbing his friend's shoulder, shaking him. But he didn't get the feedback he wanted. Instead, Tony remained where he was, the heat still clinging on to him though the fire had been put out.

"Tony?" Rhodey yelled again frantically. Why wasn't he saying anything?

_Leave me alone_, Tony thought to himself, but he still said nothing. Couldn't anyone understand that he wanted to be left alone?

Pepper looked around, finally taking in the damage that had occurred. Everything destroyed – just like that without a moment's notice. Tony was beaten, completely devoid of hope. The work that had kept him going was lying in front of him in pieces – virtually useless.

The first thing she thought was, _Is it possible to make it again before his time is up_?

She couldn't believe she could be more selfish. It had been her idea after all for him to look for the new element. He had found it, spent four days working on it, and then all of his work had blown up in his face. Now he had two days to live. The hope she had provided had been stripped away. He was miserable and it was her fault.

"Tony…?" What could she say? What could she possibly say that would make any of this better or even fair? She sat down on the floor beside him and Rhodey did the same. Still, Tony didn't meet her eyes. Looks could kill, but she would do anything for him to just look at her. She needed that reassurance. She knew she had screwed up, and she was sorry, but what was that going to do for anyone? For him?

"Please say something…" she pleaded.

"Tony…" Rhodey tried. "How much of it is…can you use any of it again?"

Tony shook his head. "There's nothing left…I can't re-use anything, I can't rebuild anything. It's over. I've run out of time."

_He talked to Rhodey_, Pepper thought to herself. _He talked to Rhodey but he's ignoring me. He's mad at me, he hates me…and it's my fault. _She wanted to say something, but she held her tongue, fearing rejection and Tony's disappointment. This couldn't be it. Things couldn't end like this. This wasn't right.

"But…you can try, right?" Rhodey asked. "There has to be something left that you can reuse and since you've already done it once it'll be easier to do again...?"

"Damn it, Rhodey, there's nothing left!" Tony yelled angrily, glaring at him. But though his eyes were brimming with anger and frustration, disappointment and sadness was laced underneath. "Even if half of what I had before was still here I wouldn't have enough time to build it all again! I don't have that kind of time anymore! It's _over_."

"We can _try_…" Rhodey said, not willing to let this go. He had only known of Tony's condition for less than twenty four hours and yet, anxiety and wishful thinking had seized him like no other. "You could get some help, get this done-"

"Don't you think I've thought about that? It's finished, Rhodes! God damn it, there's nothing left!"

Pepper and Rhodey said nothing, trying to accept the fact that the searching was over. The work, the hope – it was gone and finished. Tony had accepted it. Now it was their turn. It was the least they could do.

"Alright, Tony…" Rhodey told him. What Tony needed now was support. He needed people to not only back him up but accept that he was calling quits. He needed to know that no matter what he chose to do, they would be behind him every step of the way; even if it was only going to be for the next two days. "Alright, that's fine, Tony…you don't have to do anything else. It's alright…"

Tony nodded jerkily, staring at the work in front of him that was now null and void. Smoke still swirled around above him mockingly and all was quiet save the hissing of the broken contraption.

_No_, Pepper thought to herself. No, this couldn't be it. She didn't care if what Tony wanted, or even needed, was the knowledge that they would always support him. She wasn't going to give up. Pepper didn't want to think that Tony Stark would be dead and buried because they couldn't figure this out. What was she supposed to do with herself? For years she had worked not only _for_ him but also _with_ him and she didn't know any other way to live her life. This couldn't be it. She was _not_ going to say goodbye; not anytime soon and most certainly not in the next two days.

Rhodey sighed. "Alright, Tony…let's-"

"No," Pepper said simply. Tony and Rhodey said nothing, looking at her and Pepper dared to look back. "No."

"Pepper," Rhodey said, trying to give her the hint. _Not now. You can't do this to him now._

"_No!_" she yelled even more firmly. "This _isn't_ over."

"Don't do this," Rhodey whispered. This wasn't right, this wasn't healthy. "Not now."

Pepper breathed fast, not sure what she was doing or how she was going to tell Tony to try again. All she knew was that she wasn't giving up. And nothing in hell could change her mind. Tears began to fall from her eyes as frustration, fear and anxiety took hold. She shook her head. "This isn't it, this isn't over. We're not done."

"I can't…" Tony tried to tell her. It was hurting him to see her so wound up like this. _God, Pepper, don't do this to me now. Please, not now._ "I'm so-"

"Don't tell me that!" she screamed. "Don't tell me you're sorry." She took him by the shoulders, the never ending stream of salty tears still pouring down her face. "I'm not going to say goodbye, Tony. I'm not. So we're going to figure this out. We're going to try something else, try again, do something…because if you die I am not saying goodbye to you. There has to be something else we can try…"

Tony didn't say anything. He just looked at her. He saw the intensity in her eyes and could tell that she hadn't given up. Pepper wasn't about to give up on him. But how could she be so sure? And why did he already feel completely convinced that she was right?

"We can do something," she said, thinking. "You can't do this alone anymore, Tony. You need help, and me, Rhodey, we'll do whatever we can but we won't be enough..." The idea that had just popped into her head wasn't one Tony would like – whether he was dying or not, but she decided to go with it anyway. "You can hire people to help, you don't even have to tell them what's going on…Tony, you know you can always find help if you need it, but please, Tony, please…don't give up now."

He found himself mesmerized in her eyes. She was crying…he had done that. He had caused those tears to flow. He felt like a murderer facing the victim's family. _I'm sorry… _he wanted to say, but she didn't want to hear that. Instead, he found himself nodding; very slowly, very hesitantly at first – a simple, jerky motion. _Yes…she's right, I can try again…I'll do something differently…maybe it's possible, difficult, almost crazy but it's not going to be impossible…_ Gradually, his nods weren't just a movement – he was agreeing with her. It _was_ possible. _I can do this…we can do this._

Rhodey watched this happen before his very eyes. Tony, who had just moments ago, been ready to drop everything, to give up on trying and to accept his fate, had welcomed the prospect that life was possible. And it was because of her – Pepper. He _needed_ her. The only reason he was trying again, was because she was willing to.

She wrapped her arms around her boss, crying into his shoulder. "We'll figure this out, Tony…we'll finish this…"

_We'll figure this out, we'll finish this…_he thought to himself, repeating everything she said in his mind. Slowly, his own arms wrapped around her and his hands found her back as he embraced her. "Okay," he said simply. "Okay."

* * *

_**Midnight**_

In six hours, ten of the hundreds of interns that had requested to work under Stark Industries or Tony Stark himself would finally be granted their wish. And they were going to help him with a project of a lifetime.

It had been Tony's idea to use interns as opposed to trained engineers to help him. Engineers wanted to always argue with him, prove a point, and asked too many questions. Interns just wanted to show what they could do, were eager to learn, asked a lot of questions but never too much and knew how to keep their mouths shut. And quite frankly, he generally got along with the interns more than he did with practiced engineers. Granted, he wasn't going to actually _tell_ any of them what they were building, but he doubted that would be a problem.

Now at midnight, Rhodey had left, Pepper was asleep and Tony was in the shop. But he wasn't working on his latest project – JARVIS had taken care of the preliminary items required before the interns arrived. Now he was found himself staring at a single piece of paper with a single name in the heading.

_Pepper_.

Pepper's letter; the letter he had told himself he wouldn't write until he was sure this was going to fail (or at least more uncertain than he was certain). The final letter that he had held on to until the last minute because he didn't want to give up on life or on her.

_Pepper_.

He closed his eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered even though she wasn't there to hear it. His pen hit the paper and he began to write, silent tears falling from the corner of his eye.

**So this chapter definitely started on a positive note and then kind of went downhill from there emotionally…and then kind of better again…and then worse… Oh, damn.**

**I hope I don't sound evil or too sadistic when I say, "I hope you enjoyed this chapter!" XD or maybe :/ is more appropriate… or just :( hmmm….**

**Please review on your way out! Thanks so much! love ya!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Sorry guys, I know I haven't updated in a while. I was really busy – because I graduated yesterday! Yup! :) I'm officially done with high school, but now that it's summer, I can write and update more often. So enjoy! :)**

**Chapter 9**

_**Day 6, 6:00 AM**_

"Interns…" Pepper muttered to herself as she checked her watch again. Rhodey simply shrugged as he ate his cereal, both of them waiting for the interns that were due to arrive any minute now. "How can you eat at a time like this?" she asked him. Her stomach kept doing back flips and Rhodey was munching on Frosted Flakes.

"Hey…this is how I calm down," Rhodey defended, taking another bite. "And actually, interns are probably a good choice for a project like this."

"How? Engineers have at least been doing this for a while but interns…"

"Do you know how many people have requested for an internship under Stark Industries?" Rhodey told her. "They get hundreds of applications a day and Tony picked ten – the best of the best. Well.._I_ picked them, but still. People would kill for an internship position like this. That's why they can all come on such short notice."

"So what is it about these ten?"

"Well, for one they're all geniuses and they're from all over the world. China, Australia, Japan…"

"So how could they get here so fast?"

"Oh, they work here in America. All I had to do was send planes to pick them all up. And as long as you mention Tony's name everyone's pretty much in."

It paid to have a name like Tony Stark, Pepper thought to herself, and hopefully, it would save his life. Rhodey frowned a little, remembering something. "Where _is_ Tony?"

"Downstairs, he's working," Pepper said. "So…what are we telling them? We're not really going to tell them that they're creating a new element that's supposed to save his life, are we?"

"Tony said he was going to take care of that…not sure what that means but I wouldn't be too worried."

"Why not?"

"Because whatever mess he manages to put himself in, he always finds a way to get himself out."

_Except for this time_, Pepper thought to herself. _He's having trouble getting himself out of this arc reactor mess._ "Yeah," she said, agreeing.

_The interns have arrived – they've just been dropped off_, JARVIS announced.

"Let them in, JARVIS," Pepper told him. She and Rhodey glanced at each other, both thinking the exact same thing. _This better work. _

"Here goes nothing," Rhodey whispered before he introduced himself to each of the ten interns. Pepper silently hoped this would work out before introducing herself and leading them to Tony's workshop.

* * *

_Sir, the interns have arrived. Ms. Potts is leading them to the shop. Should I conceal the suits?_

Tony glanced at the Iron Man suits that were lined up in the back before focusing his attention on the computer screens in front of him, his music blaring. "Leave them," he said. He personally didn't see the point in hiding his things anymore, which was why he didn't care that the shirt he had chosen to wore allowed anyone to see the blue light from the arc reactor. Everyone thought the arc reactor was part of the suit – not a part of his body. So displaying the reactor like this...well, all he knew was that Pepper was going to be pissed when she found out, but he had a plan. He _knew_ how to make plans; he just didn't do it often.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Pepper and Rhodey walk in and quietly shuffling behind them, the interns Rhodey had brought in on such short notice. And of course as Pepper walked in, his music disappeared.

"Pepper, my music…" he warned her, knowing from experience that she wasn't going to do anything about it. "JARVIS, how long will it take to brief them?"

_Approximately fifteen minutes, sir_.

Tony nodded to himself, still messing with his computer. That should give him enough time to convince Pepper and Rhodey he wasn't crazy after he attempted to pull off his next stunt. Finally, Tony looked up from what he was doing and inspected the interns that had walked in, ignoring Pepper's widening eyes at the visible arc reactor. Two of the interns looked like they were about to sleep standing up but were too scared to try it, and all of them looked nervous out of their minds as they stared at him, waiting for him to make his move. None of them knew what to expect from the spontaneous man himself. But probably most obvious, they all looked uncomfortable.

Time to change that.

"They look like prisoners being led to the electric chair, I don't get it. What did you tell them?" Tony asked, as if he was disappointed at both Rhodey and Pepper. "Because quite frankly when they walked in I was half expecting some sort of applause, or ooh's and ahh's-"

One of the interns – obviously the playboy and clown of the group, cheered and two or three of the other guys in the group joined in, albeit nervously. That was all Tony needed. He made a face pointing at them as if he had just taught them a valuable lesson. "See, that's the sort of entrance I'm talking about!" The rest of the interns laughed, finally loosening up slightly. But only slightly.

_Know your audience, Tony. Work the crowd._

Though Pepper was completely taken aback by the fact that all the interns could see the arc reactor, she couldn't help but be slightly amused and relieved that he was being so laidback with them. The worry she was certain he felt wasn't seen amongst the others. He was playing the part and it was nice to see him like that – even if it was really a lie.

"Alright, now for the relatively formal introductions, that's usually next on the agenda, right?" Tony said, glancing at Pepper as if making sure he was on schedule. She rolled her eyes and he shoved the things on his desk onto the floor and sat down on top of it. Formal indeed. "You…cheering boy," Tony said, nodding at the intern who had cheered him on earlier. "What's your name?"

"Tobey-"

"Maguire?" Tony prompted wishfully.

He laughed a little. "Smith."

"Well, that's not nearly as exciting," Tony said as if disappointed, shrugging him off. "What about you?"

"Sarah Kim," the intern said, smiling.

"That's a nice name…back when I was in grade school my neighbor, she had a dog named Sarah," Tony pointed out. He nodded as if remembering a sweet memory. "That bitch hated me," he said finally, earning laughs.

"The dog?" One of the interns asked.

"No, the girl who owned it," Tony said instead and this time, everyone laughed. "Your turn," Tony said nodding at a particularly pretty girl.

"Samantha Yates."

Tony smirked. "My first girlfriend's name was Samantha…I actually _liked _her too."

She was obviously slightly uncomfortable which was what Tony was going for this time. "What happened?" she asked, mostly to be polite.

"She dumped me," Tony said, making a face that looked like he had eaten a rotten vegetable. Everyone else laughed. "Yeah, you guys would think that's funny. You kind of look like her too, you know…" Tony prompted, causing Samantha's cheeks to burn. "But I guess that's slightly awkward isn't it…is that awkward?" he asked the rest of them, batting his eyes suggestively and finally Samantha rolled her eyes, cheeks still flushed but laughing.

"Anyway, enough of that – I don't need any more Monica Lewinski jokes floating around about me-"

Tony continued on this path, greeting each one and adding his own little commentary. The entire process took a little more than fifteen minutes and by the end, Rhodey and Pepper were still in the room watching him interact with them.

"I'm not entirely sure why he hasn't thought about working with interns before," Rhodey whispered in Pepper's ear as the group laughed at something he had said. "He does a damn good job…even I have trouble with incoming pilots sometimes. They're always so uptight…"

She shrugged, smiling to herself. "He's good at it," she noted, watching.

But Tony knew exactly what he was doing, and he knew he was good at it. It was a personal gift, being able to walk in the midst of a crowd and put on a show, eventually making sure everyone was comfortable before he started his main point. But he was putting in an extra long time today, and it was for a reason. This was the last group of people he'd be in touch with if the accelerator didn't work again. At least if he died, he would die knowing he'd at least affected these interns – the best of the best, even. The future. Again, it was about legacy and Tony leaving his mark one way or another; in a positive light.

Speaking of light, he thought to himself as he lightly tapped the arc reactor on his chest.

"So contrary to popular belief," Tony said after they had all introduced themselves. "I am _not_ insane – I don't usually kidnap people from across America and tell them to meet me in my garage, and I usually don't wake up at six in the morning. So what did my beautiful ginger and my best friend tell you guys?"

Pepper rolled her eyes when he said "beautiful ginger". The interns on the other hand were all silent, waiting for instructions. The fun and games were over, now the work began and they were ready. Tony saw that in all of their eyes. _See, this is why I get along with them_, he thought to himself.

_Obviously nothing helpful_, Tony thought to himself and with that he lifted up his shirt and threw it aside, revealing his entire chest – arc reactor and silver veins included. No funny jokes about not keeping his shirt on – everything could speak for itself. Pepper's eyes widened and she held her breath and Rhodey closed his eyes, cursing.

_Tony! What are you thinking?_ she wanted to scream but what was that going to do now?

Tony, on the other hand, completely ignored the now angry and frustrated ginger and best friend and looked at all of the interns in front of him. Shock, horror, confusion…he saw it all. But he also saw something else – they wanted answers.

"I'm dying," he said simply. "Of palladium poisoning. Which, in itself, is an interesting story-"

* * *

As Tony explained, Pepper repeatedly asked herself the same question over and over again. _Is this man crazy?_ Why would he choose to tell ten people he had never met before his secrets? She thought he was going to make up some story and allow them to at least partially create the accelerator and get them to leave before they could catch on to what he was doing – instead, he had chosen to tell them the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

Why would he do that?

He was finished in less than ten minutes and as soon as he was finished he woke up JARVIS. "JARVIS!" he called out once he had said his last word.

_Yes, sir?_

"Brief them," he said as he jumped off the table and put his shirt back on. The lights dimmed and the screens around the room sprung to life as JARVIS explained the purpose of the accelerator, the plans Tony had already completed, and how they could help.

Tony actually whimpered as he approached Pepper. She was livid and Rhodey looked ready to beat him to a pulp.

"I thought you _liked_ it when I told the truth," Tony said to Pepper, but she only frowned.

"What the hell were you thinking!" she whispered angrily.

"Tony, what is _wrong_ with you?" Rhodey attacked. "You don't know any of them and you decided to tell them the arc reactor-"

"Alright, my turn," Tony interrupted, not ready for a lecture. "First, I only told them what it _did_. I didn't explain how to make the reactor so we're safe. Second, we're not going to get anywhere very fast if I have to keep covering my tracks with some engineering lie every time they ask a question. They're smart, they'll catch on. Lastly, I know I should've told you guys and you feel betrayed, blah, blah, blah, but if I _had_ told you, I wouldn't have heard the end of it and you would've whined," he swayed back and forth to portray how pointless it would have been. "And then I would have ended up doing what I wanted anyway so really, I just skipped a couple steps and saved time."

Rhodey sighed. "I need to get a drink," he said, leaving the workshop. Pepper was about to follow (though not because she wanted a drink) but Tony stopped her, taking her hand.

"I had to tell them the truth, Pepper," he said, all joking aside. "I feel…I feel as if I at least owe them that. If this doesn't work they'll be the last people to have talked to me-"

"Don't say that-" she said immediately.

"We have to be reasonable," he said and as soon as he did, he wanted to take it back. "Sorry…not like that, I don't mean that," he amended, although it was too late for that. "I feel like I owe them the truth. Not telling you the truth earlier…it still haunts me and I didn't want to go back and do that again."

Pepper nodded, understanding, but what he had said about "being reasonable" about his possible death pained her. "I understand," she told him.

"You do?" he asked, just to make sure. He needed her approval.

"I do, it's fine," she said, smiling a little. "A little heads up would've been nice too-"

"Yeah, right," he said as she turned to make her way upstairs. Tony turned around to see how far JARVIS was in briefing the team. In a few minutes, they were about to work on a project of a lifetime.

* * *

_**3:00 PM**_

They had been working nonstop with only a half hour break for lunch, and for some reason, that surprised Tony; the tenacity each of the interns had and their determination to finish as much as possible. Yet, at the same time, they were all learning, and Tony took his time to teach. The odds of him living to see next week were slim, and even though he didn't want to broadcast that information, he knew it. So he had chosen to spend a decent amount of time, passing down what he knew – advice, tips, funny things he had picked up throughout the years. There was no point in hiding his knowledge.

Three of the interns were watching him work on a particular piece of the accelerator, brainstorming ways to fix a vital piece of the machine that had been blown off by the previous explosion and seemed almost impossible to replace.

"Nothing's going to fit exactly in the area," one of the interns noted. "So we need to find something that's close and reshape it."

"But it has to be made of the same type of metal and reshaping something too big is going to just waste time…" another added.

Tony already knew how to fix the problem but allowed them to brainstorm, pitching in ideas to lead them in the right direction. Once he could tell they were close enough to success, he messed with a nearby touch screen and called Pepper.

"Pepper? Hey, where are you?" he called out waiting for her to answer.

"I'm in the house, Tony," she said as if it was a stupid question and he could easily tell she was rolling her eyes.

"Are you busy?"

"What do you think, Tony?" she said sarcastically, but he could tell there was no malice in her voice. She was just being obnoxious, no doubt to enact her revenge on him for telling the interns the truth without telling her his plans first.

"I don't know," Tony answered. "Yes? No? I honestly have no idea-"

After a very brief moment of silence, she sighed loudly and answered, "What do you need?"

"My keys-"

"You're not really going to _leave_ are you?"

"No, I'm not, listen I just need you to get my keys, alright? They're on my desk in my room. All of my keys, just bring down all of them, I'll take the ones I need."

"Sure, I'll be down in a minute."

* * *

Once she got Tony's call, Pepper immediately stopped what she was doing and answered. And when he asked if she was busy, she wasn't sure if she should laugh at how crazy that sounded or just roll her eyes and shrug it off. The entire world was on the lookout for Tony Stark, the company was about to wring her neck, she had all of this week's worry piled on her head and he was asking if she was busy? And yet all he wanted were some keys in his room. The keys were probably important for whatever he was doing and she didn't mind dropping what she was doing to get them for him – anything to make sure this nightmare was over.

Once she was inside his room, she couldn't help but be faintly surprised at how clean it was. Still, she focused on what she was looking for. _Keys, keys, keys…_ she thought, scanning the main desk in his room. Nothing. She sighed and checked his dresser to see if the keys were there. Knowing Tony, "dresser" and "desk" were pretty much synonymous – it wasn't like he knew the difference. And just as he suspected, a set of keys rested on his dresser next to a bunch of papers.

She was about to grab it and leave when she saw what the papers were – the letters. She bit her bottom lip, trying to force herself to ignore them. Those goddamn letters seemed to be following her everywhere she went, and she hated that. Was he changing them? Updating them? She didn't like looking at any of them because they kept reminding her of his possible death. The only difference was that this time, the letter addressed to her was resting on top of the others.

_Oh, hell_ she thought to herself, grabbing it and slowly opening it. Had he written anything for her? Her hand shaking, she slowly took the paper inside out and once it was out a few centimeters, she stuffed it back in again.

Words.

He had finished her letter, he could see the words scrawled in his handwriting in black ink. _Damn it!_ He was still making preparations for his own death.

She knew she had to act fast or else it would look suspicious, so she quickly folded the envelope into eighths and stuffed it in her pocket before leaving the room, making sure she left everything where it was. She couldn't decide if she wanted to read it. A part of her, the curious part, wanted to open it and read it there and then even though that was ridiculous. But the hopeful side of her didn't want to have to open it ever. Whatever was in that letter, she wanted Tony to tell her face to face – and preferably after his given seven days were "over".

Once downstairs, she walked up to Tony who was talking with a group of interns. But before she handed him the keys she pointed at his workstation, eyebrow raised. "Desk. That is a desk, Tony. You put clothes in a _dresser_."

"So?" he said, trying to grab the keys from her hand.

"These were on your dresser – not your desk."

"Well, I knew it was on _something_."

"You don't even know the difference between a desk and dresser," she said, eyeing him.

"Do too!" he whined.

She rolled her eyes and tossed him the keys before exiting the room altogether, trying to shove the letter out of her mind.

* * *

_**Midnight**_

Hours later, and the entire team had done one hell of a job – well over half of the machine was done, but everyone still needed their rest. The entire team had left a few hours and now, Tony was in his room ready to get some sleep. He was going to need it if he planned on finishing the accelerator tomorrow.

What surprised Tony the most was how serious and focused they had been about getting the job done. He expected the surprise, the disbelief – he had, after all, told all of them that he had less than forty eight hours to live. And they were the only people, except for Rhodes and Pepper, to know the truth of the entire situation. Why Tony had even trusted them with the information, he wasn't entirely sure. But for some strange reason, he felt like it was the right thing to do. _In case I don't make it – then I know I did the right thing…_

He sighed as he tossed his shoes in a corner while glancing at the letters on his desk. He had purposely left them there that morning, knowing that someone would find them if tomorrow didn't work out. But just looking at them made him feel worse, so he quickly tossed them in an open drawer.

"Tony?" Pepper asked hesitantly from just outside the door. He quickly turned around and pushed the open drawer closed.

"Yeah?" he asked.

"You need to get some sleep," she told him from where she was. The fact that he looked so tired wasn't the only thing that was bugging her. For the last few days, he only slept a few hours at night and they weren't always a few hours consecutively. She understood that the last thing he wanted to do was sleep especially considering his condition, but it wasn't healthy to not sleep at all.

"I'm fine," he said, yawning.

Pepper laughed dryly. "I can see that," she told him. "Go to bed."

Tony chuckled. "Of course, Ms. Potts." But instead of leaving at the cue, Pepper remained where she was, watching him. Instantly, he could tell that something was on her mind. "What is it?" he asked.

She shook her head. But after a moment she said, "You got a lot of work done today," she said. "You and the interns."

He nodded. "Yeah, we did…"

"Do you think it's going to be enough?"

The vital question. _Don't lie to her, don't lie to her_. "It should be. We won't really find out until tomorrow, but there was nothing more we could have done. We'll just have to see how everything plays out." He sat down on the bed and looked up at her.

"How can you take this so lightly?" she asked, finally entering the room. "It's your life and you're so…dismissive about it."

"I'm not being dismissive," he defended. "I'm…I'm just saying that there's no point worrying about it."

"_I'm_ worried," she told him. "I'm not even sure I can sleep tonight."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Does that mean you'll get off my back about _me_ getting some sleep?"

"Oh, please," she told him sitting beside him, the slight hysteria that was rising dying down within her. Now next to him, she could see the spider veins that now reached his neck and the gravity of the situation hit her again hard. The two of them sat silently for a few moments, saying nothing but meaning everything. A moment like this would either come again multiple times or never again, and it all depended on tomorrow. Either way, it was something to cherish and welcome.

"You did great with those interns today," she told him finally. "Even if you did tell them way too much information." She rolled her eyes at that one. "But they trust you. _I_ don't know how you do it."

"Am I really that difficult to trust?"

"No, I don't mean it like that-" she said, trying to defend herself. But instead, Tony laughed a little.

"Someone's on their toes," Tony quipped, smiling.

"Well, I really can't help it. I'm on edge and I'm jumpy because I don't know what's going to happen tomorrow-"

"Tomorrow," he interrupted. "Is just another day." He looked at her and she met his eyes for a split second.

"Yeah," she said, unconvinced. _Tomorrow's the most important day of your life. Of both of our lives_.

"It's still just another day," Tony told her again, as if he had read her thoughts. "There's no point worrying about it now."

_How could he be like this?_ she asked herself. He was so collected, so composed and she felt like the biggest wreck since Titanic.

"Thank you," he said, choosing to look at her. "For being here this week. It's been…hard. But you managed to pull me through it."

She nodded slightly. "It's…fine…"

"I…I just want you to know that whatever does happen-"

"Tony, don't talk like that-"

"I'm grateful," he interrupted. "We don't know what's going to happen tomorrow but it doesn't matter to me right now. I just…want to thank you for being here."

Pepper nodded again, lost in his eyes. And she found herself leaning towards him, as if she could fall into his eyes. For a moment she was lost for words but she managed to whisper, "It's okay…"

There was so much more he wanted to tell her, but he didn't think now was the best time. He wanted to tell her truths that he had still kept secret from her – how he felt about her, how much she meant to him, but he couldn't bring himself to voice them. "You're all I have, remember?" he said instead, wishing it was enough but knowing that it wasn't.

They were so close to each other now, but neither of them wanted to separate that distance. He could practically feel her on him though they weren't touching. Her breath rested on his lips and it took everything in him to not close that remaining gap. She tried to hold her breath but failed woefully and her hand rested on his chest – her palm on the reactor and her fingers resting lightly on him. He almost whimpered at the sensation. _Oh, God, Pepper…_ It was enough to make him lean that much closer.

And yet, he couldn't find it in him to continue. He couldn't do this even though he desperately wanted to. It wasn't fair, and it was almost evil for him to kiss her, especially now. What was it supposed to be? A goodbye kiss? I'll miss you? No, he couldn't do that – if not for her, then at least for himself. Doing this now would be cruel. If tomorrow worked out, then he would know if she felt the same. But now, with the fear of his death clouding their thoughts…was she only doing this because of the chance that she might never see him again? Or was there more to it? He needed to know…

So he would wait.

But her presence was obscuring his thoughts. He closed his eyes his forehead resting on hers. Her hand found his cheek, caressing. _Jesus, Pepper…_ He reached for her hand on his cheek, his fingers wrapping around hers. _If you knew what you're doing to me…_

"Tony…"

_Don't do this_, his rational mind warned him. "Pepper…"

_Don't do this_. "No…" he whimpered sadly.

The temperature seemed to drop to zero degrees. She opened her eyes unbelievingly but his eyes remained closed, as if he was already regretting what he had just said. He opened his eyes to look at her, the pain showing clearly. _I can't do this to you, Pepper. Please, understand._ "You should…" he struggled to say, carefully and gingerly peeling her hand from his face. As soon as he did, he immediately missed her touch. "You should…rest…"

His lips said little but his eyes said so much more. _Please, understand_, he begged with his eyes. She saw it, but instead she felt abandoned, hopelessly vulnerable. She had in just a few moments, opened her heart to him and he had rejected her. Lost, neglected, unwanted – that was what she felt. This time, _he_ had said no.

Before the tears could fall in his presence, she stood up and left, practically bolting from the room. Tony was alone, desperately hoping that what he had done what was right. Her smell still filled the room and the aching in his heart hurt even more. He wanted to run after her and apologize, explain in words why he had chosen to pull away. But that would defeat the purpose. If he lived to see past tomorrow, then he would explain. Then she would understand. But if he didn't…then the letter would explain and she would understand. Either way, tomorrow was going to be infinitely harder to live through.

The letter.

He managed to drag himself from the bed to check the letters, pain seeping into his core. He felt broken and with a heavy heart, he looked through all of them. _The Press, Rhodey, Stark Industries, The Military…_ he frowned when he didn't find the one he was looking for. Had he left it downstairs in the workshop? No, he remembered leaving them on his desk until just moments ago when he had put them in the drawer…

They had been on his desk all day. In his room. And he had sent Pepper to his room earlier that day…

And now the letter was missing.

He groaned, holding his head. _Crap!_ Had she already read it? No, most likely not. She would have mentioned it if she had read it, no doubt about it. But she probably had the letter now.

She was going to read the letter ahead of time, and that was the last thing he wanted. _There's nothing you can do now_, he told himself. He rubbed his eyes, wondering how he was going to deal with this.

* * *

Lost. Neglected. Unwanted.

Then anger. Anger was the next thing she felt as she quickly left his room for the guest room. What was wrong with her? He had no problem screwing any other girl without a second thought but all of a sudden he backed off when it was her? Her sane mind knew that was actually a _good_ thing, but currently, rationality was the last thing on her mind.

Sadness. Misery. That was next. And guilt. Guilty because she knew that he _hadn't_ slept with anyone for months. He might flash a glance at the hot girl who passed by or flirt with a nearby reporter – but nothing that lasted more than five minutes. And why was that?

The real reason she felt angry, frustrated and everything in between was because she had been rejected. The emotions that followed didn't always add up and make sense. And the only reason for her to feel those emotions would be because she felt something toward him.

Of course she did. He was her boss though…but had that stopped her from almost kissing him? Did she...love him? She asked herself the question but was scared to answer herself, because she feared the rejection. She wanted to first know how he felt towards her.

His letter. It was the first thing that popped into her mind and she quickly pulled it out from her pocket, unfolding it quickly. He probably knew by now that she had it but she didn't care. She ripped it from the envelope, tossing it aside and her heart stopped as she once more saw the words he had written. _No more secrets, Tony_, she thought to herself before she started to read:

_Pepper,_

_I chose to write your letter last. Writing it would have been accepting the end, and I wasn't ready to do that. For weeks I've tried to plan out what I wanted to tell you, but I couldn't make myself do it and I was scared to say goodbye. I didn't want to think about it. But I think I'm ready now._

_I want to thank you, Pepper. For sticking with me for all these years. I know I've been difficult and taking care of me is no easy task, but I appreciate it. All of it. You'll be a wonderful CEO, there's no one I can think of who can do the job better than you. I picked you for a reason – remember that, despite what any idiot may say. I trust you. _

_When I was held in captivity for three months in Afghanistan, I wasn't alone. There was someone else there – Yinsen. And he once asked me if I had a family, or someone to come home to. I told him no, but I now know that's a lie. I had you. I have you. _

_I love you._

_I'm not entirely sure when I fell in love with you. Maybe it was just a gradual process over the years. Or maybe when Yinsen asked me if I had a family, I realized it then. Or the time I came back from Afghanistan and Rhodey was leading me out of the plane. And I saw you standing there, waiting for me…and the look in your eyes – it could have been then as I walked towards you. I don't think I'll ever know. But even though we couldn't be together in this life, I'll always be yours._

_The arc reactor, Pepper. I want you to have it. I already wrote this in my will explicitly but in case something goes wrong, I'm telling you now. I want you to keep the arc reactor because I want you to always know that my heart will always belong to you._

_I love you and goodbye,_

_Tony_

For almost a full minute after reading the letter, she held on to it, staring at it. She felt as if the air had been sucked out of her and she couldn't breathe. He loved her. Tony Stark loved her. Unknowingly, she read the letter over and over again and each time, the tears poured down her face at an increasing speed. _Oh my God…God, oh God, oh God…_

She covered her mouth after reading it a few times, closing her eyes as the water from her eyes fell on their own accord. Sobbing, she knew felt the same. _I love you, Tony Stark._ _I love you. _

They had both realized it, both of them knew it, and they had never said a word about it to each other. She remembered what he had written at the beginning of the letter.

_I was scared to say goodbye. I didn't want to think about it. But I think I'm ready now._

What did that mean? He was ready to leave her? Forever? He had only written this because he was so sure he would never have the chance to say it in person before he died. He was so convinced the accelerator wouldn't work, he had written this anyway. Knowing this, she broke down, kneeling on the floor and weeping into the bed. So this was really it? She had to go back to him now, tell him how she felt…

No, she wouldn't. She wasn't going to rush it, because she had to believe that she would have the chance to tell him. She had to believe that because the only other option was that he was going to be dead. _He is not going to die…I'm going to tell him how I feel. When he's finished with the accelerator, I'll tell him_.

She had to believe that, for her own sanity.

**This chapter was so hard to write in so many different ways – please review! Thank you!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I know I haven't updated in a while – sorry. I ran into a little writer's block – wasn't sure how to organize the rest of the fic. But I dealt with it so here we go!**

**Chapter 10**

_**Day 7, 7:00 am**_

Pepper had been tentative to go in Tony's room and had stalled for almost half an hour. The interns were downstairs working and she was sure Tony was sleeping in – something he definitely deserved. Still, she was unsure how to face him after what had happened yesterday. Worst of all, she had read his letter so she knew she was going to look as guilty as hell going in there. Finally, after gathering enough nerve to face him, she knocked on the door and when he didn't answer, as expected, she walked in.

What she didn't expect to find was Tony laying on the floor, half of the bed sheets on top of him as if he had dragged them over in his sleep. He was facing the door, his mouth slightly agape.

"Tony!" she squealed running up to him and trying to wake him up, fearing the worst. She relaxed a little when she saw him breathing. Yet, he was burning up, sweat resting on his brow. "Wake up, Tony…" she begged, shaking him. Finally, he moaned a little, ducking his head as if he was trying to hide. After some more pleading from Pepper, his eyes slowly cracked open revealing his bloodshot eyes. His lips twitched as if he had a bad taste in his mouth, and his breathing was labored.

Pepper panicked. This wasn't supposed to start happening so early in the day; it was only seven in the morning, for the love of God. "Tony, do you need something? What do you need?"

He looked up, trying to focus his eyes on her, but instead they darted back and forth like a madman's. "I…was supposed to change it, but… tired…" he tried to explain.

"Don't worry about it, just tell me what you need," she told him.

He squinted, turning his head as if trying to think of the word. He said nothing for a while and finally closed his eyes again, resting the side of his head on the floor, his lip twisting in discomfort. "Tired…" he finally muttered, as if that solved everything.

"Tony, come one, get up," she pleaded. "What do you need, you have to tell me…"

He groaned, muttering something unintelligible. In an instant, Pepper left the room and ran down the stairs that led to the workshop and made her way toward the desk that held the palladium batteries. This far in the game, she knew when the arc reactor was to blame. All the interns' heads had perked up once the door had opened, thinking it was Tony but once they realized it was a false alarm, they quickly went back to work. Pepper grabbed one of the batteries along with the canteen of green chlorophyll still resting on the desk.

Tony was still on the floor in a slight slate of delirium when she made it back into his room. She pulled the covers away from him, and Tony tried to take them back, whimpering and muttering to himself – his restless eyes jumping from one thing to the next.

"No, you can't do that, you're burning up," she tried to explain, though rational explanation was the last thing he currently cared about. "Alright, here we go," she said as she raised up his shirt so the arc reactor was completely visible. The veins that spread throughout his chest, now reached the base of his neck and Pepper chose to ignore them as she placed her hand on the arc reactor and slowly turned it to the left. _I hope I'm doing this right._ As soon as she heard the first _click_ she pulled it out to find the palladium cartridge inside smoking and hissing. _Jesus, Tony_… she thought to herself as she removed it and inserted the new cartridge. The reactor quickly accepted it, the metal hooks attaching to the cartridge and she gingerly placed the reactor back into his chest, turning it again until she heard the final click.

She brought his shirt down and rested her hand on his cheek as he shivered despite his blazing fever. "It's okay, Tony, it's okay…" But though she remained composed, the worry and panic within her was rising. This wasn't supposed to be happening now – not when he still had the entire day ahead of him, not when he had to finish the accelerator. If he was like this at seven in the morning, what was going to happen at noon? At six in the evening? _It's going to be okay,_ she told herself. He _had_ to be okay, because she still needed to tell him the truth – that she had read his letter…that she loved him…

For ten minutes, he didn't seem to get any better – in fact, he was only getting _worse_. The fever was increasing, his sentences, if they could even be called that, were choppy and nonsensical, and he kept drifting in and out of consciousness. _Come on, Tony_, she pleaded silently. _You can pull out of this_.

Finally, after what seemed like hours to Pepper, his breathing became stable and the shivering ceased. As cold sweat dripped down the side of his face, his eyes slowly opened. At first, they focused on nothing and he stared into the distance. Gradually, his eyes flickered about before finding Pepper's face as if he had just woken up from a deep sleep. "What…?" he whispered ever so softly, his voice hoarse, and Pepper could hear the confusion in the single word.

"Nothing, it's fine, you're fine now…just rest for a minute, okay?" she told him.

Of course, the last thing he did was listen to her. Immediately, he tried to sit up, moving his arms feebly underneath him to support himself. She quickly grabbed him helping him to sit up with the bed support his back. He tried to reach for the canteen of chlorophyll but Pepper took it first, untwisting the cap and handing it to him.

He chugged nearly half of the liquid before resting his head on the bed, sighing. He closed his eyes – what he really wanted to do was sleep but that was ridiculous. "What time is it?" he asked.

"Seven fifteen."

His eyes popped open again. "Perfect," he muttered sarcastically as Pepper helped him up.

* * *

Once alone, he took a long look at himself in the bathroom mirror. The circles around his eyes were even darker now – he looked like he had aged and was suffering through the world's worst hangover. Sighing, he took out the familiar machine meant to take its daily reading of his blood toxicity levels. It was almost like a rudimentary drill now and he hated that he had become so used to it. He felt the familiar prick and the reading stared back at him.

_Blood toxicity: 93%_

He tossed the machine aside, running through the facts in his mind. He'd be unconscious somewhere around 97% – give or take a couple thousandths of a percent. At 97.5%, he'd stop breathing.

"JARVIS, give me a running number of how much time I have left at 93% toxicity," he said, running the tap water.

_At 93% toxicity, it is estimated you have approximately twelve hours and sixteen minutes_. In the corner of the bathroom mirror, a clock counting down appeared.

He sighed, staring at the clock counting down to his death. He'd be dead by 7:30 that night.

* * *

The two were silent as Pepper applied the cream that would significantly reduce the dark circles around his eyes. The tension in the room could be cut with a plastic knife, but still they said nothing.

"Stay still, please," Pepper told him once, but that was about it.

After another half minute, Tony asked, "Are the interns downstairs?"

"They have been for almost an hour," she told them, choosing to focus on what she was doing.

"How're they coming along?"

"What do I know about accelerometers? I have no idea," she said. But a split second too late, she realized she sounded angry and bitchy. She twisted her lip, wanting to apologize. She didn't mean to sound angry, but she was worried that if she wasn't careful, she'd sound guilty and then Tony would know something else was up.

Tony read the anger when she answered him and was quiet for a moment. _She hates me. I'm going to die and she's going to hate me_. "Sorry," he said, not really knowing what else to say.

Any other day, she would have congratulated him. "Sorry" generally wasn't in Tony's vocabulary. "About what?" she asked, trying to ease up on him.

_About everything!_ "Listen," he said, trying a different approach. "About…last night-"

Pepper freaked. Internally, of course. _Shit! He knows I took his letter_. But she still wanted to talk about what had happened the day before, right? No, she didn't. Yes, she did. Shit. "It's…nothing," she lied.

"No, it's-"

She didn't allow him to finish. "It wasn't…anything. We were both…emotional," she finished with a sigh, knowing that she was lying through her teeth. "That's just it, there's nothing to…talk about."

He said nothing, looking above her as she applied the lotion. She had read the letter – any sane person could tell. She looked hopelessly guilty and it was obvious she was trying to hide it. Yet, at the same time, she was denying having the same feelings he felt towards her.

Of all the pain he had felt in the last week, nothing even came remotely close to the pain he felt now. So she didn't feel the same toward him – she didn't love him. And God knows, he would have gone through the pain a hundred more times to know that she loved him. To know his own feelings were reciprocated would have made this entire week worth it, but now the woman he loved was standing in front of him trying to tell him that she didn't love him. And on top of all of it, he had twelve hours to live.

Pepper finished fixing him up and rubbed the remaining lotion on a washcloth, cleaning off her hands. Tony cleared his throat slightly, quietly adding, "Thank you, Ms. Potts". Before she could say anything else, he left the room altogether, looking down. He couldn't look at her – he'd break down right there if he looked at her. How was it that she still had the power to make him feel so much worse literally at the steps of death?

Trying to keep himself together, he bounded down the stairs. This was the last thing he wanted to do – to fix his current problem, find a cure and then go back to living life. Go back to _what_? A life where he'd have to look Pepper in the eye every day, knowing that he had offered his heart and she had denied it? It wasn't her fault she didn't feel the same way, but how would he be able to not only deal with it but accept it?

Feet away from the glass doors, he stopped, still on the stairs, resting his head on the wall and closing his eyes. He didn't want to be here. He wanted to mourn alone, in his room, and let the twelve hours he had left quickly pass him by. But he had ten interns downstairs working on the machine meant to save his life, desperately hoping that they would. He had Rhodey, wherever the hell he was, crossing his fingers hoping they'd see each other tomorrow. And he still had Pepper expecting a miracle.

He sighed, opening his eyes, trying to keep himself together. He couldn't afford to break down now, even though that was the one thing haunting his mind. So with sadness he had never imagined and pain that seeped into his inner core, he opened the doors to his workshop and smiled. He smiled to encourage the ones looking up to him and trying to help, and he smiled so they would know that he hadn't given up and that there really was hope.

He smiled, in the process, perfecting his lie.

* * *

_**10:00 AM**_

For the last few hours, Pepper had silently hoped she had done the right thing. She didn't want Tony to know she had read the letter – she wasn't supposed to anyway. And in shrugging off what had happened yesterday, she was playing the "responsible Pepper" part she always played; nothing out of the ordinary there. So all was well, right?

At least, she desperately hoped so. Usually, she could read Tony's expression as if he was an open book. Now, the one time she wished she could read his expression, she was having trouble hiding her own. She sighed, frustrated, as she made her way toward the kitchen where she found Tony messing with the coffee machine – and obviously struggling with it. Any other day, she would have scowled, telling him it was too early for coffee but made it anyway.

She walked up to him, trying to hide the worry etched into her face. Tony was holding up a piece of the coffee maker machine in one hand while trying to read the instructions engraved in the side. Pepper rolled her eyes as she took the piece he was holding and decided to save him the grief. "Well, now you can claim to be the only engineering and mathematical genius that _still_ doesn't know how to work a coffee machine," she joked.

"It's a stupid invention," he muttered to himself as if that changed everything.

"And yet, the entire world thinks it's the best thing since sliced bread, myself included," she said, glancing at him.

When he didn't say anything she added, "You shouldn't be drinking coffee so early."

"I know."

"So why are you taking it?" she said, all joking aside.

"Because I'm exhausted," he said, rubbing his eyes. Despite the mini surgery she had performed on his eyes just a few hours ago, she saw that he did look tired. She remembered what JARVIS had told her just a week ago. _Mr. Stark's degeneration will be completely painless. And he will most likely pass away in his sleep._

He was tired because he was dying. His body was getting ready to shut down.

* * *

_**12:00 PM **_

Lunchtime, and Tony was back in his bathroom, checking how fast his deterioration was taking place.

_Blood toxicity: 95%_

Instinctively, he stuck his pricked thumb into his mouth but just as he did, he immediately gagged. His own blood tasted like a bar of metal. _Is that even possible?_ he thought to himself as he rinsed out his mouth, the bitter taste lingering. He gagged again which morphed into a stream of coughs that shook his entire body.

He held on to the faucet to keep himself from collapsing, as the coughs grew stronger, controlling his movement and in the back of his mind, he recognized the bitter metal taste in his mouth. The coughs subsided for a few moments and Tony touched his lips, the slick, dark red liquid staining his fingers. He inhaled deeply, trying to catch his breath but not a moment too soon. Seconds later, the coughing resumed, racking his body as he heaved. Drops of blood splattered into the sink.

* * *

_**1:30 PM**_

"There's nothing left for them to _do_," Tony tried to explain to Pepper just as Rhodey walked into the workshop.

"What's going on now?" he asked. He could tell almost instantly when they were arguing – there was a certain aura that was expelled into the air every time they were about to attack…

"He wants the interns to go home," she told Rhodey angrily, but keeping her voice quiet as to not alert everyone else in the room.

"There's nothing left really for them to work on, and I can do the rest myself no problem," he explained to Rhodey, quickly shifting all of his attention to his friend and immediately Pepper was hurt. Lately he had been ignoring her, or at least trying to ignore her. Now that Rhodey was here, he had quickly jumped from her to him, without a second glance – as if just looking at her was painful.

Rhodey didn't notice any of that – instead focusing on what Tony was telling him. "Are you crazy? So what's the big deal if they leave later?"

"I don't mind if they leave later, I just…don't want them around when I actually _test_ this thing."

"Why?" Rhodey.

"Because it might not work," Pepper said sadly looking at Tony. "Is that it?"

Tony shrugged and rolled his eyes, sighing. _Yes_.

Pepper looked away, her lip twitching in thought. Rhodey exhaled deeply. "When do you want them out of here?" he asked finally. "Give me a time and I can get everything else set up."

"Four," Tony said instantly. He'd already though through all of this – three hours to put the finishing touches himself. He could do that…right?

Rhodey left to make the arrangements as Pepper silently hoped for the millionth time that this would work. When she turned around she found Tony looking at her, sadness filling his eyes. Not just looking at her, but staring right into her eyes. His eyes were trying to tell _her_ something, but once again she found it impossible to completely read his expression. What was he thinking? What was he trying to say?

_I should tell him now_, she thought. _Tell him the truth – that I read his note, that I love him…_

Her throat suddenly felt dry and her tongue heavy as she walked past him, trying to push those dark, sad eyes out of her mind.

* * *

_**3:00 PM**_

Time flies when you're having fun. _Or when you have four and a half hours to live_, Tony thought to himself as he finished up yet another cup of coffee. In an hour, he'd be sending the group of interns home. Still, he knew exactly how to repay them.

If the accelerator worked, then they would all be credited with the discovery of the new element – which meant Tony probably wouldn't be allowed to name it Starkonium as he had previously planned. Damn it.

And if it didn't work…well, it wouldn't matter then, now would it?

* * *

_**4:30 PM**_

Already?

* * *

_**5:00 PM**_

After seven cups of coffee, Tony had still managed to fall asleep. He had only meant to take a small five minute break but obviously the rest of his body didn't think five minutes was long enough.

Pepper had found him first, on her way down to check on him and see how far he was coming along. She didn't know exactly how much time he had, though she was certain Tony knew but wasn't telling anyone. When she didn't hear any whirring, sawing, or the sound of any mechanical machinery running, she immediately panicked, but when she saw him asleep in his chair – she relaxed slightly.

"Hey, Tony…" she hummed, shaking his shoulder slightly. But instead of waking up or stirring, his head rolled to the side, his lips parted slightly. "Tony," she said a little firmly but still he didn't wake up. She bent down next to him, desperation rising. He wasn't breathing. "Tony!"

Rhodey was downstairs within moments, having heard Pepper's screams. "What's going on?"

"He's not breathing!" she screamed, scrambling somewhere else before Rhodey could stop her. He rested his index and middle finger on Tony's neck feeling for a pulse. His heart was beating which was a good sign; means he had only been out for a couple seconds—

Before he could analyze the situation further, Tony was splashed with a bucket full of ice cold water and a good portion of it landed on Rhodey. Tony suddenly jumped up and began gasping for air, eyes wide and filled with terror.

Pepper was standing above him, holding an empty bucket, trying to slow down her heart. _It's okay, he's fine now._ Tony was still trying to swallow the air around him, holding on to his chair as if it was the only thing keeping him connected to Earth.

"You stopped breathing," Rhodey informed him, with a hint of annoyance and frustration hidden in his tone of worry.

"I'm fine," Tony said, trying to shrug it off though he was still gasping. "I'm…fine, I just…fell asleep…"

"And stopped breathing!" Pepper said, trying not to yell.

"I'm fine…" he was finally starting to catch his breath and as he did, he realized just how fast he was running out of time. He couldn't afford another one of his power naps – not only because he had two and a half hours to live but because these power naps could very well be the death of him. Literally.

"Tony," Pepper said seriously, looking him in the eye. "What aren't you telling us? How much time do you have? And what can we do to help?"

Truth time. _I have two and a half hours to live and I need your help to make that a lot longer._ The look on Tony's face warned Pepper and Rhodey that whatever they were about to hear, they weren't going to like it.

**That's it for this one. Hope it wasn't too much of a disappointment. I know everyone was expecting the big 'finale' to happen in this chapter but I chose to do this instead…which means the big finale is coming up NEXT! WOOHOO! (I don't mean big finale as in "the end". A few more chapters before I officially close so don't worry).**

**So watcha think of THIS chapter? Hmmm? Review please. Wanna know why? Because reviews make the world go 'round. Everybody knows that! ;)**


	11. Chapter 11

**I went out to watch The A-Team after posting the chapter and when I came home I had a LONG list of reviews stocked up in my email! It made me happy! :) Thanks guys! I mean, over 200 reviews already? Holla! XD**

**And now for the next chapter:**

**Chapter 11**

_**Day 7, 7:15 PM**_

Pepper literally thought her heart had fallen through the floor once she heard Tony had less than three hours to live. Over the past week, her heart had done backflips, somersaults and even cartwheels but to find out he was so close to Death's gates – she hadn't been prepared for the news. But she was filled with new determination – now they had a visible deadline. And the three of them were going to kick ass to meet it.

Unfortunately, Tony's kick ass stamina was diminishing. And fast. As time passed him by, he found it almost impossible to keep his eyes open and his endurance disappeared. Keeping his eyes open for more than ten minutes at a time was becoming difficult, and if he stayed on his feet for too long, he'd find himself on the brink of unconsciousness due to simple exhaustion. He felt as if he'd run a marathon across the entire country and was now forced to stay awake – it was pure torture.

Pepper and Rhodey did their best to keep him awake, but doing so was difficult even for them. They both knew he was in pain and to force him to endure it was excruciating on its own right. The hours passed and the accelerator in its completed form now snaked around the entire room. But they weren't finished yet – they still had last minute finishing touches and adjustments before the accelerator could officially begin its work.

By seven fifteen, Tony knew his time was up. His body was weak and he was breathing came in short gasps as if there wasn't enough air in the atmosphere. Beads of sweat dripped down the sides of his face and his shirt clung to his back. All he wanted to do was sit down and close his eyes but he knew if he did there would be no waking up. He didn't need to calculate how much time had left to the second – it wasn't much longer anyway.

"Tony, you need to sit down," Rhodey finally told him, trying to hide his panic. "You can explain it from there or JARVIS can-"

Tony shook his head but when that proved to be more exhausting than he expected, he muttered, "No – can't sit down…just let me-"

"No, it's fine, come on, Tony-" Pepper tried to convince him taking him by the arm and leading him to the nearest seat. He obviously didn't want to follow but didn't have much choice, collapsing into the chair. JARVIS was trying to pick up from where Tony had left off, explaining how to finish he last minute details to Rhodey. But Pepper's attention was focused on her dying boss.

"It's going to be okay, Tony," she told him, taking his shoulder gently. "It's going to be okay…you're going to be fine."

He swayed back and forth as he took in each shaky breath and shook his head slightly. "How do you know?" he asked, shaking.

It hurt Pepper to see him like this. Not just weak and exhausted but _broken_. It was a side of him she had never seen even throughout the entire week. He had threatened to give up, had almost lost hope but now she felt as if she was talking to a shell of the man she once knew. She reached up and took his face in her hand. "I _know_," she told him firmly, looking into the dark eyes she knew so well. But this time, she sensed emptiness as well; and it scared her.

He took in a sharp breath and winced but just before Pepper could ask what was wrong, Rhodey called out, "I think it's done! JARVIS, am I done?"

_The accelerator is complete. Should I commence charging?_

"What?" Rhodey exclaimed, more than asked. What the hell did that mean?

As JARVIS tried to explain what to do next in layman's terms, Pepper turned to Tony, a glint of relief in her eyes now that this nightmare was over. But when she looked at him, the relief within her disappeared. Tony's breathing was coming in short bursts and yet it he looked like he was trying to hold his breath.

"What's wrong?" Pepper asked taking his hand.

He was running out of time and he knew it. He probably had just minutes left – his vision was fuzzy and now, now he felt like someone was literally squeezing the life out of his heart.

"What's wrong?" she repeated, her own heart racing.

"Chest…tight," he gasped, trying to point at Rhodey. "He needs to…switch on…JARVIS can do the rest…"

"Shh, stop, he'll get it-"

"Not enough time," he said closing his eyes and wincing while squeezing her hand.

"Pepper!" Rhodey called out as the accelerator came to life, whirring and humming. She hesitated for a moment, wanting to stay by his side. "Pepper!" he called out again a little more frantically, but she still didn't leave him. Instead, she looked Tony in the eye. _Hold on for me, Tony_. With hesitation plaguing her movements, Pepper finally stood up and left him.

"What?" she yelled over the noise at Rhodey who was struggling with turning the wheel.

"The lever – I think it's on his table…"

She ran to retrieve it and by the time she came back, the familiar beam of energy shot out of the opening – drilling a hole into the wall. Rhodey ignored it, attaching the lever and pulling it towards him, moving the beam towards the target that had been set up earlier.

For a moment, Pepper watched the beam move at an excruciating rate. Then realizing she couldn't handle just staring at it for God knew how long, she turned towards Tony and saw him standing up, his two hands gripping the table for support.

"I need to do it-" Tony tried to explain, his breathing sounding forced.

"He's got it it's okay-"

"I need to put it in…" He motioned towards the accelerator as if to say he wanted to go there.

She didn't understand why he needed to be there but she complied anyway, mostly out of fear and worry. She put one of his arms over his shoulder allowing him to lean on her slightly. Slowly, the two of them shuffled toward the machine and Tony tried to ignore the growing pain in his chest. It wasn't supposed to hurt – he wasn't supposed to die in pain, he knew. That was the point of the solution he had invented, but he also wasn't supposed to be awake right now either. At a blood toxicity level so high, he was supposed to be unconscious, but instead he had chosen to fight through the growing exhaustion that plagued him. He wasn't on the brink of consciousness anymore – he was on the brink of death.

Halfway toward the accelerator – he lost it. Whatever was keeping him grounded disappeared. The room started to spin, his legs felt like jell-o and his arms went limp. His legs gave way as his eyes rolled towards the back of his head. Pepper shrieked as the two of them came crashing towards the floor.

"Tony!" she screamed trying to stay upright with his head resting on her shoulders. "Tony, come on – we're almost there."

He groaned, his tongue feeling heavy as he gasped for air. Pepper, knowing they couldn't go any further, set him down on the floor. "Tony, come on…"

Everything happening around him seemed to fade. He couldn't hear Rhodey working on the new element, the sound of the machines and even JARVIS's voice had vanished. Pepper was looking at him, holding his face in her hands saying something, repeating something over and over again but he couldn't hear anything. He couldn't even feel her hands on his face. The pain in his chest was numbing and even though his breathing was ragged, he couldn't tell. He was drifting, drifting…

So this was dying? He would have laughed had he had the strength. If this was dying then he had no idea why anyone feared it. It was so peaceful, so painless. He was leaving…

"Tony!"

He was forcefully brought back to the present by the sound of his name. He was still alive and he could hear the noise, feel the pain…

"Tony, look at me…" she pleaded, crying. "Look at me, please, look at me…"

The tightening in his chest returned, and he tried to suck in the little air he could. Air entered his lungs in quick shallow bursts, his chest rising and falling quickly and as he tried to breathe. His eyes finally found Pepper.

"Tony, it's going to be okay…"

No, it wasn't. It was too late for him now. He wasn't getting enough air and the edges of his vision were turning black. It was over. He felt her soft, perfect hands in his hair, trying to draw him back. This was why dying was hard – he'd have to leave her.

"Stay with me," she begged, but he knew he couldn't do that. His breath caught in his throat – literally, and he panicked, trying to take in some air. A nerve wracking moment passed and he closed his eyes, hating the discomfort. And just as quickly as the sensation had come, it left and his lungs seemed to work again.

"Tony?"

He opened his eyes, as another moment without air took over. He was dying, leaving her. With every ounce of remaining strength still inside him, he lifted his arm, reaching for the side of her face. His hand gently caressed her cheek, feeling her soft skin and his fingers brushed against some loose strands of hair. With his thumb, he lightly wiped a tear away. _Don't cry for me, Pepper_.

Tears still falling, she held his hand in place, her fingers wrapping around his. "Tony…Tony, don't leave me, please…please, don't leave me…"

He didn't want to leave her, God knows he didn't want to. But he could feel himself leaving, slowly disappearing. The dark edges surrounding his field of vision were closing in on him.

Pepper held on to his hand, calling his name. His eyes were open but they seemed distant and his hand was limp. Panic seized her as she grabbed his shoulder screaming for him. "Tony! Tony! Tony…oh, God, no, no, no…"

She didn't even notice Rhodey come up beside her, holding the arc reactor with the new element resting within. He held it up beside her, breathing heavily and staring at his best friend, lying on the ground unconscious.

With tears still streaming down her face, Pepper quickly lifted up his shirt and removed the arc reactor inside him. Quick as a flash, she put in the new one and as soon as she had, she looked at him, holding his face in one hand. He was still breathing faintly but she could tell he was losing him. This was it. This was goodbye.

"Tony!" she shrieked shaking his shoulders hoping something would work. "Tony, please, don't…"

A shaky, sharp breath. His eyes focused on her and for a moment, her heart stopped, thinking he was coming back to her. The remnant of a smile crossed his lips as if to tell her that it was going to be okay. His eyes fluttered shut, a final breath, and then – nothing.

"No!" Pepper screamed, but his eyes didn't open. It was too late now – but she had to tell him…she had to. "Tony, please…" she lowered her face so she was just above him, her right hand still on his cheek and tears pouring down her cheeks. "Tony, I wanted to tell you – I read the letter…I know you didn't want me to but I read it anyway. I read it and I realized…I love you, Tony. I love you so much, and you can't leave me now, please…I love you…" she blubbered endlessly not thinking about the words coming out of her mouth but meaning everything. She rested her head on his lifeless chest, sobbing. "I love you, Tony…" she whispered. Her hand continued to caress his cheek and she felt the warmth slowly leave him. She lifted her head to look at him. Eyes closed, color leaving his face. She remembered the dream she had just last week of his death and remembered that in her dream, he simply looked _dead_. For some reason, now he looked like he was finally at peace. She leaned down and gently kissed his cheek. "I love you."

Rhodey placed a hand on Pepper's shoulder, comforting her but silently mourning and grieving. He was looking at his best friend's lifeless body, had even watched him die. It wasn't fair and it wasn't right. Pepper buried her face in Rhodey's shoulder and wept bitterly at the loss of a friend and the man she loved.

* * *

Tony had it all figured out. He was a billionaire that made weapons and slept around. Alright, so "heaven material" wasn't exactly plastered on his forehead but after he hit the jackpot in Afghanistan with the Ten Rings, things had changed. He became Iron Man. And as if that wasn't good enough, he was the reason the world had experienced its longest peace period. The six months of "Responsible Tony" had to count for something right? And he was genuinely a nice guy – isn't that a good thing?

So when he found himself back in the middle of an Afghan desert – well, he wanted to talk to whoever was in charge. And as if that wasn't bad enough, the worst sandstorm he had ever imagined or even heard of seemed to be happening in his current location.

_Perfect. In my hell, I get to relive the worst three months of my life – plus a sandstorm. _

He would've preferred the pit of fire. _I think_.

Wherever he was, Tony couldn't see anything. The sand whipped around as if it was forming a giant tornado with him in the center, and the blistering heat wasn't helping matters. What the hell was this place?

_Tony!_

He squinted, holding his hands to his face to keep sand from entering his eye. Someone was calling him.

_Tony!_

He knew that voice…her…she worked for him. What was her name? Ginger, freckles…

_Tony, please!_

Pepper! How could he forget? What was wrong with this place? He wanted to scream her name but he seemed to have no voice. Where was she? He turned in every direction but he could see nothing except for the whirling sand around him. And she sounded as if she was everywhere at once.

_Tony, I wanted to tell you…I read the letter…_

Where was she?

_I know you didn't want me to, but I read it…and I realized—_

Instinct told him to go against the blowing wind. The wind and surrounding air was the evil thing trying to keep him away. But trying to walk in the opposite direction was easier said than done. Within moments, he found himself on all fours trying to crawl against the wind.

_You can't leave me now, please…_

This was pointless, he knew, but he tried anyway, getting nowhere. He didn't even know where he was going – everything here looked the same? Was he stuck here – whatever "here" was?

_Please…_

His chest tightened and Tony gasped. He relaxed once the pain had subsided but it happened again – and again. It felt like someone had tied a rope around his heart and was trying to pull it out of him.

Tony collapsed as the sand and wind consumed him.

**Update coming soon! Review please because that will make me type A LOT faster. **


	12. Chapter 12

**I got a record number of reviews for the last chapter – super thank you! How about I keep this A/N short and let you read on, mkay?**

**Chapter 12**

Tony wasn't exactly sure when the sandstorm finally ended. All he knew was that it was significantly cooler buried underneath the sand than it was above it – which didn't make any real sense at all. Still, underneath was better than the hell above – no pun intended.

Finally, when he could tell that the activity above had ceased, he slowly dug himself out into the open and looked around. Nothing except for the endless, rolling hills of sand. A cloudless sky was above him, almost mocking and there was nothing to see for miles.

Oh, joy.

Reluctantly, Tony pulled his legs out of the sand and took off one shoe to empty out the sand. He might as well, considering he'd probably be there for a while. He was about to take off his next shoe when he noticed something in his peripheral vision. He quickly turned to see who it was and at first, was convinced he was going crazy, if that was even possible.

A helicopter was about to land in the middle of the desert about a hundred yards away. Tony quickly stood up, abandoning his shoe, trying to figure out what was happening. A few people were leaving the helicopter all dressed in military camouflage and they were running towards someone. Tony walked a little closer to see who they were running towards and saw that it was a man who looked like he had just been through world war three. He had a bloody arm and was on his knees waiting for them to reach hi m. As Tony approached, he saw and immediately recognized the blue light on the man's chest, visible even through the shirt he was wearing.

The man on his knees was _him_. It was Tony, six months ago waiting for the helicopter that would take him home from the middle of the Afghan desert. Without thinking or trying to make sense of the situation, he ran towards the helicopter. _Hey!_ Tony wanted to scream as he ran, but his throat seemed locked. By the time he reached them, Rhodey had reached just-out-of-captivity Tony. _How was the Fun-vee?_

Recently-dead Tony wasn't sure what to do now. They couldn't see him and he couldn't say anything. So what was the plan? "Hi, I'm Tony from the future. You died by the way, yeah six months from now. Anyone hungry? I ordered a pizza from 1-800-GOTOHELL. It should be here in a millennium or so."

_Get on the helicopter_.

The voice echoed in Tony's mind and he whirled around as the scene behind him unfolded.

_Get on the helicopter_.

Tony continued to search for the voice that was everywhere at the same time while the Rhodey behind him helped the "other" Tony get into the plane.

_This isn't your time. Get on the helicopter._

What the…? Tony thought to himself as he watched the other army men get in the helicopter. Everything was happening just as it had happened six months ago, and they weren't about to wait for Tony to catch up. Without much thinking, Tony quickly ran towards the escaping helicopter and jumped in.

* * *

A full minute had crawled past them and Pepper was still crying into Rhodey's shoulder. She finally turned away to look at Tony's lifeless body, completely still. It didn't seem right and even though she was staring at him, it still didn't seem physically possible for him to be dead. It didn't make sense in her head; like when she was stuck in a really bad dream and didn't know how to get out of it.

Only this was no dream.

Silent tears slipped down Rhodey's face too, not knowing what to do. He hadn't planned for this – despite the gnawing feeling of doubt he had felt he had still expected it to work. He hadn't planned to say goodbye. He didn't think he would have to.

Both of them wondered the same thing – What now?

Doing something, or even starting to do something was acceptance. But neither of them wanted to accept the truth that was in front of them. What now? Should they move his body? Call someone? And the interns that had been helping for the last two days, now they had to tell them it was all in vain?

Pepper finally pulled away from Rhodey completely. Still looking at Tony, she told him, "He wrote letters."

It was the first word spoken since his passing and Rhodey didn't comprehend at first. "What?"

"Goodbye letters," she explained, brushing aside the stray hairs on Tony's still face. "He wrote goodbye letters to everyone – Stark Industries, the Press…me…you…" She slowed down realizing that something was wrong. Tony's skin was warm – so warm, almost as if he had a fever. That couldn't be right, not after over a minute had passed.

_Goodbye letters_? Rhodey thought to himself but he noticed the look upon Pepper's face. "What is it?"

_Stop it,_ Pepper told herself. So what if he was warm? He wasn't breathing, he had no pulse – he was gone. And hanging on to every last shred of hope now was pointless. But even as she tried to convince herself that all hope was lost, she couldn't help but notice that the color in his face was also returning.

"Rhodey?" Pepper whispered as she placed her hand on his cheek. What was happening? She felt for a pulse but found none, still the hope she had grappled for was buried in her heart.

"Tony?" she whispered so quietly she herself barely heard it.

"Pepper," Rhodey told her gently. "Don't…" He didn't want her to do this – get her hopes up, and for what? So they could be dashed on the floor again?

But it was too late to stop her racing heart now. She was lost in her own world and only one person was on her mind. _Come on, Tony…Come back…_

_

* * *

_

Dark. It was dark and that was just about the only thing he could comprehend. He couldn't hear, feel or see anything else. The only observation he could actually grasp and understand was the impenetrable darkness that seemed so thick he could even taste it.

_He wrote letters._

Pepper – without a doubt or a single hesitation. Her voice echoed in his mind as if she was talking to him in an empty, giant hall. But she sounded closer now, as if she was just right next to him. He still couldn't see anything and the darkness was choking but at least he heard her voice.

_Goodbye letters. He wrote goodbye letters to everyone…_

He detected the lightest sensation on the side of his face, as light as a feather. At first, he couldn't figure out what it was, but as feeling returned, he realized it was a finger – Pepper's finger, tracing his hairline. Her soft fingers resting on his skin seemed to send a jolt of electricity through him. He wanted to respond, say something – dammit he wanted to _look_ at her.

Suddenly the sensation disappeared and Tony immediately felt abandoned – as if he was back on that stupid desert again. _No, come back!_ he wanted to scream, but his throat felt as if it had collapsed and he couldn't breathe…

For the first time, he realized he wasn't breathing. Shit! Panic took over and as that happened, the burning feeling in his chest strengthened. Air…he wanted air…

_Rhodey…?_

She sounded worried. What was going on? Was Rhodey okay? And why couldn't he breathe? He felt Pepper's fingers return but this time they were on his neck and not his face. Her touch seemed to bring him towards her, as if she was holding a chain and trying to yank him out of a deep abyss.

"Come back, Tony…come back…"

Her words were drawing him closer to her – further and further away from the endless void.

"Come on, Tony…"

He could hear the hope in her voice, the anticipation beckoning him.

"Tony…"

A jolt of electricity once again coursed through his body and as it did, his lungs relaxed and he was finally given the chance to inhale. As the fresh air entered his body, feeling flowed through him. He could at last sense the clothes he was wearing, the cold sweat still resting on his brow, the air conditioned atmosphere surrounding him – he could hear the low humming of his machines and gadgets, the heavy and expectant breathing of his best friend and the woman he loved. And as he slowly opened his eyes, trying to gasp for air, he could see the tears in both of their eyes; the joy and relief within them. He was home.

* * *

When she felt the slight pressure on the side of his neck she wasn't sure what to do or how to respond. Her body seemed to be frozen in time and space and it was as if she was out of her body, watching the entire experience. Tony was alive, his heart was beating – her Tony was alive.

And then the struggling first breath, his slowly opening eyes – those dark, brown eyes.

It was when she saw his eyes she lost all sense of composure. She covered her mouth with her hand to keep herself from screaming as her body racked with fresh tears of new and refreshing emotions – tears of joy, relief, love. She took in a shaky breath as she watched him come to, albeit weakly. "Oh, God….Tony…"

His chest continued to rise and fall with every breath and though he was still weak, his eyes flew around as if trying to figure out where he was. He opened his mouth slightly to say something but only incomprehensible sounds escaped his lips. Disorientated, he tried to grab at the air around him as if to say he wanted to get up.

Rhodey quickly hooked his arm underneath him, holding up his head so he could breath. He wasn't even sure how to respond. The friend he had thought was lost was breathing in front of him. Conflicting emotions ran through him until at last he just laughed, relief flowing through. "You son of a bitch," he added – for good measure, still laughing.

Tony tried to half laugh at that, though it looked more like a satisfied smirk. It probably would have looked less obnoxious if he wasn't so focused on breathing. _In, then out, in….okay let it out now…_

It was when he laid eyes on Pepper he abandoned his focus on respiration. The emotions he saw flooding through her eyes were enough to paralyze him and the same emotions he saw in her eyes were mirrored in his own. She wrapped her arms around him, unwilling to let go and allowed her hands to knead through his hair – the sound of his breath on her ear, the beating of his heart, the humming of the functional reactor – she was having trouble trying to get her brain to accept all at once. He tried to mutter something but Pepper stopped him. "Sh, it's okay…it's fine, you're fine…"

_Welcome back, Mr. Stark. _

Tony actually chuckled at the sound of his AI. Even JARVIS sounded relieved to hear that he was back. Exhaustion began to take over and he rested his head on Pepper's shoulders, eyes closing gently.

"Let him sleep," Rhodey told her once she realized he was out. "He's earned it."

_Mr. Stark isn't quite out of the woods yet._ JARVIS warned. _The amount of palladium in his blood stream is still high so an extensive period of detoxification must take place before his system can be deemed fully functional. It is estimated total period of detoxification should take anywhere from three to five days._

"We should take him to his room," Rhodey said, about to carry him. Pepper let him take him, still hardly believing everything that was happening.

It was fine now. Everything was fine now because her Tony was alive.

* * *

The first three days were like hell.

The worst was over, Pepper knew. But knowing that still didn't help when she sat by him for hours at a time, holding his hand and watched him shiver uncontrollably. The fever she had first noticed had increased over the last few days and his skin was flushed. And worst of all – he remained in an unceasing state of delirium; eyes always unfocused and never entirely sure where he was. Yet Pepper remained by his side, doing her best to cool him down and keep him grounded.

"Hey, Tony…" Pepper hummed, placing a damp washcloth on the side of his face. "I'm here…"

"Mmph…" he muttered in reply, eyes rolling into the back of his head, twitching.

Rhodey was always slipping in and out of the house, checking up on Tony whenever he could, growing increasingly worried at his regressing state. He wasn't looking any better and he wasn't _getting_ any better.

"How is he?" Rhodey asked. Just looking at Tony hurt.

"The same," she answered quietly, looking up at him.

"We should take him to a hospital."

Pepper shook her head emphatically. "No, no we can't-"

"This isn't right," he interrupted, motioning towards Tony. "This isn't healthy – what we _should_ do is take him to a hospital to make sure he's really doing okay."

Pepper still didn't like that idea. "He wouldn't want to be taken to a hospital and JARVIS already said that the detoxing was normal, that he'd be fine-"

"Does he look fine to you?" Rhodey questioned, trying not to sound as aggravated as he felt. Meanwhile, Tony squirmed in his bed, his forehead damp. His eyes rested on Rhodey though they didn't seem completely focused. Rhodey rubbed the side of his head in a feeble attempt to calm down. "When was the last time he had anything to eat?" he asked.

He _had_ been eating, Pepper told herself. Even if it was just a slice of bread here and a cup of juice there, he was keeping some food down. Whenever he was in his right mind, at least which sure as hell wasn't often. But the few bites he managed to keep in his system wasn't enough. And Pepper knew that. "I…"

"It's fine-" Rhodey tried to tell her.

"No, it's not…it's never fine," Pepper said, trying not to break down. Despite everything that had happened throughout the last week she had managed to live through it handle what had been thrown at her. Now, the reactor had been fixed, Tony was finally on the questionable road of recovery and she still felt as if she was going down the steepest drop of a roller coaster. When was it all going to end?

"He's almost out of this," he reassured her. "We're all almost out of this."

Pepper nodded, her bottom lip twitching as she exhaled deeply. "Okay," she said simply.

* * *

The next morning, Tony woke up, his eyes slowly cracking open and adjusting to the light. And for the first time in over a week, he felt rested. He didn't have a headache, didn't have a sudden urge to run to the restroom and throw up and (best of all) didn't feel exhausted. He turned his head, trying to figure out where he was and what he had missed and saw Pepper next to him. She was asleep; sitting down in a chair next to him but the upper half of her body was resting on the bed. Her hand was wrapped around his and for a moment, Tony remained where he was as bits and pieces of information returned to him. The reactor… Rhodey had been working on it…then he had passed out, or something… Tony rolled his eyes and groaned – trying to remember was only hurting his head.

Reluctantly, he pulled away from her grip and slipped out of the bed. But the first steps he took weren't as graceful as he would have hoped. His knees buckled and he quickly caught himself on the side of the bed before falling flat on his face. _Alright, it's not hard…right, left…something like that. _Slowly, Tony shuffled out of the room.

_Good morning, Mr. Stark_.

JARVIS's voice echoed throughout the room and Tony nearly jumped out of his skin. "_Shut up!_" Tony whispered angrily, quickly turning to see if Pepper had woken up. She only stirred slightly. Tony quickly left the room, closing the door behind him. "No talking in that room, JARVIS!"

_Good morning to you too_, JARVIS said and even Tony heard the sarcasm.

"Alright, alright, good morning."

_I'm reading significantly improved vitals._

"Yippee," Tony muttered but he couldn't help but smile to himself as he made his way to the kitchen. Without paying much attention to what he was doing, he started pulling every piece of edible food onto the countertop. He couldn't care any less what he was about to put together – he was starving.

"Tony?"

He jumped and dropped the cereal bowl in his hand and it came crashing to the floor, shattering into pieces."Shit!" he muttered, quickly turning to see Pepper standing outside his room. "Hi," he said after a brief moment of silence. "Sorry, I-"

She didn't even wait for him to finish. She ran up to him and in a moment, her arms were wrapped around him, her face in his chest. Tony staggered back slightly, caught by surprise but he hugged her back, sure that this would be the one and only time he'd be able to do so.

"Oh, God, Tony…"

"It's okay, I'm fine-"

"I missed you so much."

"I didn't go anywhere," he said, though he knew what she meant.

"You…you were gone but then you came back-"

Tony wasn't entirely sure what she was talking about. "What?"

"You were dead, Tony…and then the last few days, you were delirious-"

Tony blinked – both of these pieces of information were new. "It's fine, I'm fine…"

"I missed you so much…"

"It's okay…I didn't go anywhere," he repeated.

She pulled away to look at him, smiling a little. She held on to him with one hand as if frightened he would disappear and lightly tapped the arc reactor resting underneath his shirt. She nodded ever so slightly to herself as if remembering something, her mind returning to the memories of the last week.

"Pepper," Tony whispered quietly, drawing her back to the present. He held onto the hand tapping his reactor. "You okay?"

She nodded as if to assure herself. "Yeah."

They hadn't noticed Rhodey walk in through the doors on the side and he happened to catch them in their current position. Worry had been etched into his skin but as soon as he saw Tony standing, any hint of anxiety disappeared. And when he saw Tony _and_ Pepper – he wasn't entirely sure how to make his entrance.

He finally decided on, "Am I interrupting something?"

Tony and Pepper turned, quickly letting go of each other. _Damn it_, Rhodey thought to himself. If they had talked (as in "talk" talk), then they wouldn't have reacted like that.

"No," Tony quickly said, answering his question.

"Uh-no, no we were just-"

"Talking-"

"Yeah, that-"

"And he just woke up-"

Rhodey smiled to himself._ I can get used to this_. "What's up, man?" Rhodey asked, patting his friend on the back. "How're you feeling?"

"Pretty good, Platypus," Tony said, smirking to himself and returning to his collection of food items on the table.

Rhodey shook his head, making a face. "Don't call me that, Tony-" he warned.

"Why not, Sour Patch?"

"Don't call me that either."

"Well, now you're just being rude-"

"What the hell is all this stuff?" Rhodey asked as Tony made some sort of sandwich that included potato chips, chocolate spread and pretzels.

"Tony?" Pepper asked, grimacing at how disgusting whatever he was making looked. "What is that?"

"I have no idea," Tony answered, as he stuffed something in his mouth. "I'm just hungry. Hey, it's your fault you haven't fed me anything."

Pepper's jaw dropped and Rhodey started laughing. Tony winked, stuffing something else into his mouth.

"So, Ms. Potts-" Tony said, mouth full. "What have I missed?"

"Excuse me?"

"Come on, I've been out for over a week, there's got to be something I've missed – I'm special."

Pepper smiled, trying to list things off the top of her head. "Let's see…you've missed three dinners, a benefit-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's boring. I want the latest scoop – give me something _interesting_!"

"Okaay…" Pepper said slowly trying to think. She snapped her fingers. "Oh, everyone's been wondering where you are since you've been missing for a while and the most interesting stories have come up. Some people think you escaped to Canada, other people think you're going through the world's worst hangover-"

"Tell him the Brazilian story," Rhodey said, smirking. "This is a good one."

Pepper didn't seem to think it was a good one but she rolled her eyes and said, "Most unlikely but widely speculated excuse is that you eloped with a Brazilian…exotic dancer….and went to Germany."

"Like a stripper?" Tony clarified and Rhodey burst into laughter.

"I _said_ exotic dancer…"

"You meant stripper," Tony said. "Hmm…I'm not into strippers. That's a dumb story. And Germany…I don't think I've ever been to Germany."

"Yes, you have, multiple times-" Pepper interrupted.

"I mean _not_ for business."

"Oh, well in that case no. And Stark Industries has been haranguing me about you. You need to make an appearance soon or else they'll have my neck. And I'm sure they'll love that."

"Aw, they don't mean it," he said. "Hey, Rhodey have you called the interns yet?"

"Uh…" Rhodey said, a little surprised that he'd brought them up. "No, not yet."

"Give them a call – how fast do you think I can have a new element approved?"

Rhodey, Pepper and Tony continued to talk as Tony tried to catch up on everything he had missed. Rhodey, for one, was surprised and slightly disappointed at how fast Tony and Pepper could return to their professional roles. The two of them needed to talk, but they seemed more comfortable playing the Ms. Potts and Mr. Stark parts.

Yet, Pepper and Tony maintained the well established front. Pepper knew she'd talk to him later but Tony was convinced it was all a lost cause. She had already made it obvious she didn't want a relationship, and he couldn't bear to lose her. So it was best for him to quickly go back and play his established role in their boss-employee relationship.

Rhodey rolled his eyes. Tony Stark had literally been brought back from the dead and nothing had changed.

Only in this household.

**Excuse any typos. Hope this chapter wasn't too fast. So…tell me what you think! Review please! I really want to know! And for all you closet readers out there – your opinion counts! ;) (Remember when I said that reviews make the world go 'round? Yeah, I wasn't lying).**


	13. Chapter 13

**Excuse any typos plz :)**

**Chapter 13**

Tony was staring at the accelerometer that snaked around the room. Looking at it now, after all had been said and done was a bittersweet moment. On one hand, the machine he was looking at had ultimately saved his life, even if it had decided to malfunction the first time. On the other hand, it had also caused so much pain to people around him. In the end, it was really Rhodey and Pepper who had saved him. The accelerator was just a necessary piece. So many times in the last week he had wanted to quit and the prospect of death meant the end of the worry and the pain. And he probably would have given up had it not been the hope supplied by Rhodey and Pepper that had fueled his own. Now as he looked at it, he saw not only life and a second chance but also memories that he would rather forget.

And he wasn't entirely sure where to start with the disassembling of the machine. It could take days, or even weeks just to move everything out and to do so he'd have to start breaking it down, tearing it apart…no wonder he paid people to do everything.

Rhodey found Tony looking perplexed and stood next to him, looking at the accelerator.

"Good times, huh?"

"Yeah, _that_," Tony said, playing along. "And I _really_ don't feel like breaking this down now."

"So do it later."

"What else am I going to do?" he said lazily as he started untwisting a segment. "Fix the drama going on at Stark Industries? That doesn't sound like me."

Rhodey smirked but held on to the piece Tony was working on so it wouldn't come undone. Now that the two of them were alone, he sensed a looming sadness surrounding Tony's presence. Today was a time of celebration or at least relief that the drama and chaos was over. Yet, Tony seemed everything but excited, relieved maybe, but the happiness anyone would have expected was nonexistent. Something was bothering him. But Rhodey wasn't entirely sure how to ask.

Maybe it was just being in this room? The ill memories that now found their home in the workshop were bound to stay forever. Were they haunting him now?

"You don't have to do this now," Rhodey told him.

"Why not?" Tony asked, baffled.

Okay, so that wasn't what was bugging him. "Because you're a lazy ass and you're only going to make me do most of the work," Rhodey quickly saved. Tony laughed at that one.

"So…when do I get my letter?"

The piece Tony was trying to detach fell clattering to the floor but Tony didn't bother picking it up. He just looked at his friend with a look in his eye that read: _You're not going to drop this are you?_

"What letter?" Tony asked, playing dumb.

Rhodey chuckled. "You know what letter. Pepper told me you wrote some. I want to know when I get mine."

"Feeling sentimental, are we?" Tony said, turning the tables.

"And…Pepper?" Rhodey prodded.

Tony didn't say anything for a moment but Rhodey saw the playfulness leave him. "What about Pepper?"

"What do you mean 'what about Pepper'?" Rhodey asked, enjoying this game. Making Tony uncomfortable was always fun. After what he had seen that morning between the two of them and Pepper's confession just moments before Tony had nearly died – well, there was _something_ going on that he was missing.

Tony didn't answer him. He just looked at him and rolled his eyes, getting back to work.

"So there _is_ something I'm completely oblivious about."

"This isn't high school," Tony deadpanned.

"So I'm right?"

"There's nothing – hold this," Tony demanded, giving Rhodey a particularly difficult job just to get back at him.

"So I'm right?" Rhodey repeated, purposely pushing his buttons.

"No." Tony finally gave him a straight answer without meeting his inquisitive eyes. "No, there's nothing."

Rhodey was so close to questioning him again but when he noticed Tony's downcast eyes and mouth set in a firm line, he changed his mind.

Tony was hurting.

And why should he? He was alive, wasn't he? But that obviously wasn't the root of his disappointment. The source of his disappointment was Pepper and considering the…position he had found the two of them earlier that morning before he had spoken up, Rhodey didn't quite understand what the problem was.

Rejection? It could be the only logical explanation. Someone had been rejected and by the looks of it, Tony had been on the receiving end. Rhodey tried to figure out some sort of time sequence in his head – he hadn't been at the house all day. In fact, he had only come back from the base an hour ago. Something _must_ have happened while he was out. Of course, Rhodey had no tangible proof so this was all speculation. Maybe they _had_ talked, and Pepper had dismissed any notion of a relationship.

But even that seemed out of character in so many ways – Pepper had admitted she loved him, so why would she deny it now? After everything they had all been through? Rhodey had no evidence, no proof, nothing to go on – but rejection was definitely the underlying root. And that was a hard prospect to face, especially for Tony.

Tony had gone through a week and a half of pain, and not all of it physical. The first time Rhodey had found out about Tony's problem, he was halfway through his designated week, only a few days left. And he had even said that the reason he was even bothering with the accelerator was because Pepper had hope that it could be completed. Without her hope, Tony's was nonexistent. He had failed once and had gotten up to do it again – because of Pepper. He had tried because of her and had written that letter because of her. During the week, he didn't need to know if she loved her – just that she cared. And his feelings toward her – whether from love or friendship – made the week tolerable. But knowing that she felt the same way about him would have made the week worthwhile.

From the observer's point of view, it seemed like Pepper and Rhodey received the brunt of the blow. They had to take care of him, be his strength and source of stability in a trying time. And having to do that as well as remain hopeful for Tony's sake was difficult. But now that the cards had been dealt and the worst was over – it was easy to see that it was really Tony who had ended up suffering in the long run. He could have chosen to give up and let it go –but he hadn't because of her. And it wasn't simply the matter of choosing to continue. Dying is easy – living is what was hard. And she was the reason to choose the latter. And now that the reason proved to be in vain, nothing seemed to be worth it.

Rhodey asked no more questions as he helped him clean up.

* * *

Pepper was in Tony's room holding the letter she had so frantically opened days before. But now that she was there, she wasn't sure if she was ready to talk to him about it. He wasn't in the room – he was probably in the workshop tinkering or taking apart that obnoxiously large contraption (she didn't care if it had been necessary, the worry it had caused was enough to make anyone frustrated). So she stood in his empty room, twiddling with the obviously handled letter not sure if she should just leave it and see where things went from there or confront him once and for all. From the way things had gone back to normal earlier that morning, it didn't seem like Tony was too eager to change anything.

But she couldn't help but remember what had happened earlier that morning before Rhodey had walked in. Tony had held her and looked into her eyes, and just by looking at him she could tell there was so much more he wasn't telling her. She wanted to know what that was.

"Pepper?"

She gasped and spun around facing Tony, clutching the letter. She hadn't even heard him walk in. Yet he didn't seem in the least bit annoyed or even curious as to why she was in there. He actually had that satisfied smirk slapped across his face – the same one he wore whenever he was about to do something he knew she wouldn't approve of.

"I just wanted…to make sure everything…was in line," Pepper lied. Terribly.

"You do realize," he said, walking up to her. "That by _not_ being my employee any more you don't have to look after me as often as usual. And since I'm _not_ dying anymore you do have the right and privilege…"

He was right in front of her now, completely in her space, breathing the same air even until he could be no closer. Yet, Pepper willed herself to keep her cool. She focused her gaze on Tony but instead of things going where she thought they were, he reached behind her, his hand on the dresser and finished his sentence. "To go home."

His hand snapped back beside him and she saw that he was holding a bunch of envelopes - the letters he had written. He raised an eyebrow and squinted as if carefully examining her reaction and Pepper held the straightest face she could. After a moment, he turned around, taking the letters with him.

What was that all about? Was he teasing her? She frowned at the notion and realized he had completely ignored the envelope that was in her hand – there was no way he could have missed it.

"What about this one?" Pepper said before he completely left the room.

Tony turned around to face her, stopping just outside the door. For the first time since the encounter, she saw a different emotion in her hands – not triumph, not that smart-ass look but a genuine look of either sadness or disappointment. She couldn't place it. "What about it?" he asked.

She hesitated before saying, "Aren't you going to take it too?"

He smirked, the smart-ass look returning but the sadness did not leave. "Well that would be relatively pointless," he told her. "After all, you already read it. Right?"

Pepper's heart hit her throat but Tony didn't even spare her a second glance as he walked out the room, throwing the letters on a nearby table nonchalantly. Pepper followed him, on his heels.

"How did you-" Pepper started.

"Pepper, I'd like to think that I can read your expressions like a book considering how long I've known you," he said sounding more amused than anything else. But in an instant, he dropped the subject entirely. "JARVIS! Move everything I have tomorrow up an hour and a half – any dinners or benefits that are before noon, cancel and Pepper-" he turned around as if remembering he had just spoken to her, walking backwards. "Where the hell is that Natalie chick?"

Had she just imagined what had happened just a few seconds ago? Tony had just stated that he knew she had read his letter and he had landed on the subject for a whole two seconds. Why was he jumping back to professionalism again?

"What are you doing?" she asked, bewildered.

Tony stopped. "Well, I'm _trying_ to be responsible – you usually like it better when I'm responsible."

"And this?" Pepper asked, holding up the letter. She wasn't sure if she should be disappointed or frustrated.

Not even the slightest hesitation crossed his countenance. He nodded his head slightly as if to say, _Go on…_

She was flabbergasted, not even sure what to say and in her state of confusion, she just exhaled suddenly, frowning. "Fine," she said after a moment, hurt clouding her eyes. She tossed the letter aside and turned, walking in the opposite direction.

"Are you _angry_?" Tony asked, genuinely curious causing her to stop and turn around to look at him.

She smiled – a look of disappointment rather than good humor. "Really, Tony? I usually thought you were so good at reading my expressions."

"You're angry. At me," he said in disbelief as he stepped closer. "I'm sorry, I thought you preferred the professional Tony Stark – you've at least made that obvious on more than one occasion." Biting sarcasm.

"What does that mean?"

"You know quite well what that means, Ms. Potts."

How did he do that? How could he maintain almost complete professionalism yet show his hurt, anger, frustration and resentment? Why was he being so cruel?

"No, _Tony_," Pepper insisted. "I don't."

"Pepper, don't toy with me," he spat out, walking past her. Another side of him she had never seen.

"_I'm_ toying with you?" Pepper demanded, grabbing his arm before he could leave angrily.

"You read it, Pepper," Tony finally said, acknowledging the letter. "You read it. You know how I feel. And you don't need to insult me by pretending that you feel the same just for my sake." He didn't yell, didn't show any outward anger. Yet, frustration seemed to be seeping out of every pore in his body. He spoke barely above a whisper – a voice he reserved for annoying members of the board or a particularly nosy reporter but never _ever _for her.

"Oh, okay, Tony. _You_ were about to kiss _me_ that night. And _you_ were the one who chose to back off. And now you're saying _I'm_ toying with you?"

"You know why I said no." The anger and resentment was waning, now being replaced with a cold bitterness.

"I _don't_. You're assuming I know these things, Tony – I don't know. _Tell me_."

He didn't say anything at first and Pepper found herself staring into his cold and calculating eyes. She had never seen these eyes before and she hoped she never would again. It was as if they held a barrier between the two of them, completely impenetrable. But at last, the barrier came crumbling down. "Because you're different," he told her simply. "Because I don't need you for quick lay but because I need _you_. And because I care about you…and I wanted to know if it was because I care or because I wanted to escape the notion of death for a couple minutes-" He paused as if realizing he had already said too much.

"And what did you find?" Pepper asked, honestly fearing the answer.

"That it didn't matter," he said about to leave again but Pepper stopped him.

"Why do you keep assuming what _I_ think?"

"I'm not assuming anything. You said so yourself, it was nothing. That it _meant_ nothing."

"I never-"

"The day after," Tony reminded her. "We were in my room and _I_ tried to talk about it. About _why_ – and you said that it was meaningless."

She remembered – but she had only said those things because… "I thought you didn't know I read the letter. I know you wouldn't have wanted me to read it."

"Then why else would I write it?"

"Because you wanted me to read it after you died. That was when you wanted me to read it but I read it beforehand. So…I said that…because I thought you wouldn't realize I had already read it." Jesus, this wasn't helping her argument. "It doesn't even make sense now but Tony I-"

"Don't-"

"I read it afterwards, Tony," she interrupted frantically. Now it was _her_ turn to speak. "I was angry. I was angry and frustrated because you didn't kiss me and at first I thought you were just toying with _me_…and that's when I read your letter." Just remembering brought tears to her eyes but they did not fall. She had cried enough in the last week. "I read it afterwards and I saw that you loved me. And I knew I loved you too but I couldn't tell you that because then it would mean I thought you were going to die – and I couldn't do that. So I decided to wait, Tony-" she tried to let everything out almost in a single heartbeat, as if fearing she would forget something or change her mind halfway. "I waited because I didn't want to give up and because…because I love you so much and-"

He shook his head almost unbelievably. "I thought…" His words got stuck in the back of his throat.

At the most inconvenient time possible, her Blackberry in her pocket started to ring obnoxiously and Pepper groaned loudly. She whipped it out without even looking at Tony, not yet ready to face him again fearing rejection and yelled into the receiver, "What!"

Tony would have laughed had it not been for this strange turn in conversation. And he still had Pepper's words locked inside his head. She loved him – it hadn't all been in vain. There had been truth. She loved him.

"This isn't _my_ problem anymore, I don't work there," Pepper spat out angrily and Tony took a mental double take.

"I don't know who you should call but it most definitely is not me." And with that she hung up and stuck her phone back into her pocket.

"Who was that?" Tony asked suddenly.

"Stark Industries. I resigned."

Those words felt like a punch in his gut. So she was leaving? "Why?"

"Because, Tony – I can't handle it!" she shrieked, about to go into full rant mode. "All this week when I've had more important things to worry about _they_ keep calling and interrupting me when I couldn't care any less what was going on. And then there's _you_! I don't know when you're going to do something crazy like kill yourself or…or…wreck the whole company…or…."

"No, it's fine," Tony said, taking her hand, his eyes downcast.

Pepper stopped, hesitating – her breath caught in her throat. "Uh-"

"You've been taking such good care of me, you deserve better," he said quietly. "Right?"

The words he was saying scared her, and the sincerity and honest sadness in his eyes added to the fear. "No," she whispered softly, shaking her head as she wove her fingers through his. "No, it's not I don't want to-"

Tony pressed his lips to hers, finishing what he had once started. Her eyes closed and her other hand found his cheek, taking him in. His arms wrapped around her and his hand rested on her neck, feeling her skipping pulse that so easily matched his own. Her mouth opened slightly and Tony used the opportunity to pour himself into her.

He could never let her go. He knew that now. His hand slowly travelled upward from the crook in her neck, taking her face in his hands and feeling her soft hair in his fingers. He needed this, he needed _her_.

She broke away slowly, immediately missing the touch of his lips on hers. Her breath was heavy on his neck. "I want this," she whispered before taking him again. "I want this."

"Don't leave," he murmured between kisses.

Pepper stopped again, looking into his dark eyes. "I don't intend to."

"Then why-"

"Tony – I resigned as CEO. I…was hoping my previous position as your assistant was still available," she said, a playful smirk dancing on her lips but with hopeful eyes staring back at him.

Tony's smile was undeniable. "In that case, welcome back, Ms. Potts," he whispered before taking her lips again.

**The aftermath! Up next…only on *catchy theme music* **

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	14. Chapter 14

**I'm going to college orientation tomorrow so I wanted to quickly get this chapter in! **

**Well guys, this is it. The last chapter. Sadly, all good things must end and I really, really hope you guys thought this was a good fic! Enjoy the latest and last installment! It's a really short one.**

**Chapter 14**

_**3 Days Later**_

That morning, Pepper woke up in Tony Stark's room…in his bed to be precise. In the back of her mind, she was hit with a mild case of déjà vu, remembering the last time he had woken up in his bed – two weeks ago, the night after she had given him the solution meant to end his life after one week. Yet, at the same time, the situation was now entirely different. Tony had decades ahead of him now (if he watched the Iron Man stunts of course) and she…well, she was naked underneath the covers and facing a sleeping Tony Stark.

She sucked in her lips to keep herself from chuckling and waking him up. He looked…hopelessly cute when he was asleep, his mouth half open like a child's and at the same time, completely peaceful. He needed the sleep after the chaos the last week had provided and their last night…activity.

"What's so funny?" he murmured, startling her.

"Nothing…wait how did you know-"

"It was either that or you were choking on air," he said, finally opening his eyes slightly, smiling. "Good morning."

"Morning," she said, leaning towards him to kiss him. "How long have you been awake?"

"Half an hour," he admitted.

"You were watching me sleep?" she said, honestly flattered but trying to sound suspicious.

"You had no problem watching _me_."

"That's not fair," she said, pouting. But her mind was still resting on the fact that Tony hadn't left. So many women had been in bed with him and for each one, he had left long before they had even opened their eyes, not bothering to even see them out the door. He had never made an exception – except for today. And knowing that made her heart swell. She wasn't another one of his accomplishments – she was his, forever and always, completely and entirely. And she loved that.

"We should get up if you want to get to work on time," she said, not willing to follow her own advice.

"No…" he groaned into the pillow. He was about to leave the house for the first time in two weeks and now he wasn't ready leave the bed. But for the last few days, all he had wanted to do was get the hell out of here.

He didn't understand what the big deal was with leaving. He wasn't a psych patient, he could leave the house whenever he wanted. Yet, Pepper had managed warn JARVIS that if Tony stepped one foot out of the house she would teach the AI the true meaning of "permanent software malfunction".

"But that's blackmail," Tony had whined.

"It's just as effective," Pepper had told him. "Besides – JARVIS likes me."

"JARVIS doesn't seem to remember who created him."

_I'm right here, you know_, the AI reminded him sarcastically.

Of course, with the prospect of leaving the house came the unfortunate issue of having to make some sort of story as to why Tony had gone AWOL for the last two weeks. Personally, Tony thought the "world's longest hangover" was a good enough reason but of course, Fury got in his way through Agent Coulson.

And apparently, the best reason was no reason at all.

"Stark Industries wasn't affected by your disappearance in any way so you don't need to come up with an excuse to validate your disappearance," Coulson rationalized. "It was obviously for a personal reason so, therefore, it's none of their business."

"Well, that's…lame," Tony had decided. "So if they ask, I'm supposed to say none of your business?"

Agent Coulson shrugged. "Use your imagination."

With that, he walked out of the room and Tony thought about it for a moment. He turned to look at Pepper who was standing over him. "I still like the hangover idea."

"No one's going to believe you."

"That's the beauty of the idea!" he had said excitedly.

Pepper hesitated before answering him, raising an eyebrow disapprovingly. "Fine," she muttered as the frequently disappearing Natasha Romanoff walked in, sans catsuit – which happened to be the first thing Tony noticed.

"Where's the suit?" he had asked immediately, earning a fiery look from Pepper. Tony pretended to be picking at something in his nail.

"I'm glad you're feeling better," she had said instead as she walked up to him, a few papers in hand. "And your vitals look promising."

How the hell would she know his vitals? "JARVIS seems to like _everyone_," he complained as he glanced at a few of the documents.

"Actually, Fury has an updated report. Not even an ounce of palladium left in your system."

"How does _he_ know?"

"He knew you'd ask that. And he told me he wanted me to tell you that he 'has his eye on you'."

"Hmm," Tony had said unimpressed as Pepper signed in the designated areas, formally relinquishing her position as CEO to Tony Stark – who wasn't looking forward to it.

"I hate CEO-ing," Tony had told her just minutes before Natasha's arrival.

"Well, then who's supposed to be in charge?"

He thought about it for a second before replying, "JARVIS?"

_No, thank you, _the AI had replied promptly.

Unfortunately, no one seemed to agree with him so Tony had no choice but to accept the position. Of course, he could just hand it over to one of the members of the board who were dying for the spot but he wasn't that desperate yet.

Now the next day, he was half asleep in bed with Pepper Potts. And all he could think was, _Stark Industries can go to hell._

Pepper easily read his demeanor. "I know what will wake you up," she told him.

"Pepper, you are _insatiable_."

"_Tea_," she corrected, laughing as she reluctantly rolled out of bed. She picked up the nearest item of clothing – Tony's AC/DC t shirt – and slipped it on before leaving the room.

She could get used to this – easily. It just seemed right, _normal_ to wake up beside him in the morning and it aggravated her to know that it took Tony's impending death for her to realize she wanted to be with him.

Behind her, she heard a door opening and some shuffling feet as the water boiled. She reached up to pick up a mug and tea bag as he approached. "Tony? Tony, are you up?"

"Not quite…"

Pepper shrieked and spun around, dropping the mug that shattered on the floor. Rhodey was standing behind the table and he wasn't sure if he should start laughing or look appalled. "This is…new," he decided, trying not to laugh.

_Oh, God_, she thought to herself. She looked like a deer in headlights – a deer wearing nothing but her boss's shirt. "Um…it's…" _What? It's not what you think? It's everything he's thinking_. She groaned, knowing there was no point. "Well, you might as well help me pick up all this glass," she said angrily as she left the room to find something more appropriate to wear. She found Tony standing at the bedroom door, pouting. Obviously, he had just observed the whole thing. "But I like it when you wear my t shirt."

Pepper frowned, but found it impossible to be truly anger as she quickly went past him and out of Rhodey's field of vision.

"It took _both_ of you long enough," Rhodey said, smirking. "Now, what have you got to eat? I'm hungry."

* * *

Ever since the great Tony Stark had gone missing, the public was growing in an increasing frenzy. Not necessarily because they were worried about his whereabouts, but because his whereabouts remained unknown, a total secret even to Stark Industries. Tabloids had jumped on the story like vultures above an animal carcass and newspapers were disappearing from the stands faster than ever.

"It's nice to know I'm appreciated," Tony said, smiling to himself as he did a quick Google on his disappearance.

"Yes, appreciated or just used just to sell magazines," Pepper said, unable to hide her disgust and frustration.

"You're cute when you flare your nostrils."

Pepper wrinkled her nose. "I thought I looked constipated," she deadpanned, raising an eyebrow.

"It's a euphemism."

"Interesting euphemism," Pepper said, laughing. "Anyway, we have a few things to take care of before you're officially out of the house…you have a six o'clock dinner benefit that you absolutely must attend, oh, and one of the interns has requested a letter of recommendation for an engineering opportunity at MIT-"

"Consider the recommendation done and I'll be at the benefit by eight thirty."

"You need to be at the benefit _on time_."

"But I don't even want to go," Tony whined, standing up in front of her. "It's boring, it's dull and it's not even one of the exciting benefits where's there's entertainment and stuff blows up-"

"Well, that's just unfortunate-"

"We don't _have_ to go…we could go out…have dinner…" Tony suggested, lacing his fingers through hers suggestively.

"I'm not easily bribed," Pepper said turning up her nose, being intentionally difficult. She was about to go on to what was next on the to-do list.

He leaned towards her and kissed her gently and Pepper eagerly accepted him. Tony's lips glided towards the side of her neck as he whispered into her ear. "Dinner at Ferrari's?"

"Italian?"

"Of course."

"Tonight?"

"Absolutely."

"What time?"

"You name it."

She bit her lip as she rolled her eyes to the ceiling, pretending to think about it. "We'll spend three hours at the benefit."

Tony pulled away, frowning, obviously not pleased with the deal. "One!"

"Two."

"Done," he decided.

"Wait…I thought you wanted to keep…us…quiet?" Pepper reminded him. They had both decided to keep their relationship a secret from the public, but neither of them were entirely sure how long that was going to last. Tony was always in the public eye, a place Pepper hated ever since she had become CEO and at the same time, he didn't want anything to happen to her if Iron Man ever became an issue or threat. He didn't want her anywhere near harm's way.

"I could rent out the restaurant?" Tony suggested.

"No, you can't!"

"Of course I can."

"But that's hardly fair to everyone else who-"

"Relax," he said, rolling his eyes as she adjusted his tie. "I'll take care of it."

And for some crazy reason, she believed him. She put her arms beside her and sighed happily. "I think that's all, Mr. Stark."

"Yes, that's it, Ms. Potts," he smirked before they made their way out the door.

* * *

"Jesus Christ," Tony murmured to himself as he looked out the tinted window of the Rolls Royce. Happy was driving and smirking, pleased that he wasn't the one about to get out of the car.

They were just outside Stark Industries and a mob of reporters was waiting for him, microphones practically attacking the car. People were yelling questions as if they expected him to wind down his window and answer them.

"Brilliant," Pepper muttered.

"You know a decent amount of them probably want to talk to _you_," Tony said, glancing at her. "You were CEO for what – two weeks? How do they even know I'm going to be here?"

"Well, Stark Industries knows – I gave them a heads up. It might have gotten out. And I had a justified reason for choosing to resign," Pepper quickly added.

Tony looked at Pepper one last time before getting out of the car. The beautiful and poised yet headstrong and slightly stubborn woman that he was in love with. She encouraged him to be better and become better and accomplish more than he ever thought possible while keeping him grounded. He lived for her and he would die for her. He didn't know it was physically possible to feel so strongly toward a single person. His hero and savior was sitting in front of him, and nothing on Earth would make him blow his chance with her.

"Time to go," Pepper told him, urging him on. A small smile crossed her lips.

He smiled back before opening the door and for a split second, the reporters' yelling diminished until it was just a low hum.

"Honey, I'm home!" he announced before the swarm of voices surrounded him again.

**TA-DA! :) **

**I hope everyone enjoyed the journey and I'm endlessly grateful for ALL my readers! Thanks so much for the support, especially to my reviewers! This is my first completed piece (EVER!) of a significant length so it's a great milestone I've passed with all my readers' help! You guys kept me motivated! **

**I'm actually planning on a sequel. I've been jotting down some ideas in my notebook and I think you'll like them! :) If anyone else has any ideas though, please leave a review or PM me and I'll see what I can do, ya? If you haven't reviewed yet, please give me a little thumbs up or thumbs down so I know how I did for this fic and if you liked it or not! Tell me what you wished I did, liked that I did, what you'd like to see next, the whole deal. Anything! Any and all feedback is definitely appreciated.**

**Thanks so much again! And I hope to see you soon! Don't forget to leave me one last review for the road ;)**

**xoxo writingmonkey10**


	15. note

_**Sorry. No update.**_

_**BUT - the sequel to this fic is out. It's titled "The Road to Happiness" so if you haven't already, knock yourself out XP**_

_**Not sure if it's FanFiction legal to put up an A/N only though I have seen other people do it (this was someone else's idea actually) so if it is illegal...well, my bad. **_

_**Umm...kthxbai**_


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